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FF: Renter's Blues (PG)

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  • Linda J
    RENTER S BLUES By Linda J. Disclaimer: yeah, yeah, yeah, they re not mine, I don t own them, they won t make me rich! Rating: PG Setting: Takes place after X2
    Message 1 of 1 , Feb 20, 2006
      By Linda J.
      Disclaimer: yeah, yeah, yeah, they're not mine, I don't own them,
      they won't make me rich!
      Rating: PG
      Setting: Takes place after X2
      Summery: The brotherhood is looking for a new headquarters

      "It's not much to look at…" The landlord warned the strange and
      rather odd looking group as he opened the front door. "But it's the
      only furnished place I have right now."
      "It will do nicely," Erik assertively declared before he
      even saw the inside the aged two story house.
      "Um…some things may need a little fixin'," The older
      white `normal' looking male explained as the rest of the group
      slowly strolled into the house, examining what was probably to
      become their new hideout. "I'll get to them soon. I promise"
      Pyro leaned over to whisper to Mystique who had taken the form of an
      ordinary looking woman, "Like hell he will."
      She gave him a flirtatious smile. This young juicy boy was next on
      her "hit" list and winked.
      "Have you ever known a normie who wasn't a born liar?"
      Magneto gave the two mutants a harsh `keep quiet' look and began to
      rush the landlord over to the side to discuss the leasing
      "Hey!" The ferocious mutant, known to most as Sabretooth,
      bellowed as he started walking up the stairs, "Can we keep animals
      in here?"
      "You better hope we can," Toad who was testing all the
      light switches, spoke in a teasing manner. "Otherwise, you'll have
      to stay outside." *Grrrrrrrr* Victor gave his quasi friend a
      threatening look but chose to ignore his remark for the moment at
      least and continued to walk up the stairs.
      Meanwhile Mystique and Pyro made their way into the kitchen. It was
      dingy and the walls were covered with faded, old and poorly designed
      wall-paper. The ceiling was covered with water spots from the
      leaking roof. Pyro walked over to the double sink and looked down
      at the rust stains and the dripping faucet. He nervously played
      with his lighter opening and closing its lid with even more fervor
      then usual, perhaps the annoying noise it made was John's way of
      unconsciously expressing his dissatisfaction to his new home.
      Mystique opened the door to the pantry and flipped the light switch
      on. Suddenly, the cool, calm, commanding and ever in control
      Mystique came running from the kitchen screaming at the top of her
      "AAAAAAGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!" She cried. "Mouse!"
      "Um…yeah, yeah," The landlord tried to explain away the
      problem. "The last tenants were a bunch of slobs…never cleaned up
      after themselves. We've been trying to get rid of the pests for a
      couple of weeks now, but there might still be a couple of rodents
      hanging around. A few bugs too but nothing really bad."
      "Then you live here and we'll take YOUR house!" Pyro
      threatened the landlord only to have Magneto grab him by the
      shoulder and whirl him around to speak to him.
      "This place will suit our needs just fine young man. Now,"
      Magneto used a caring and fatherly voice. "Go check on Mystique, she
      is probably hiding in the van." At that moment both Toad and
      Sabretooth were making a mad dash into the kitchen.
      "Mouse? Where?" Sabretooth asked excitedly as he leaped
      from the balcony to the living room floor with a thud.
      "It's mine!" Toad yelled,
      "I was here first!" A moment later both Erik and the
      landlord could hear the two mutants in the kitchen struggling to get
      the mouse first.
      "I called it!" Sabretooth growled as Toad kicked him into
      the wall.
      "Too bad, you mangy ol' cat!" Toad retorted as Sabretooth
      through a kitchen chair at him. *crash*
      "Ah! There it is!" The mouse was hiding in the corner of
      the room praying for dear life. *ZAP* and suddenly the mouse was in
      Toad's mouth and swallowed in one gulp.
      "Don't feel bad Vic." Toad tried to comfort Sabretooth
      before his temper got the best of him. "I'll let you have the next
      The landlord looked at Erik and made sure he pointed out the part of
      the lease that said the renter was responsible for paying for all
      damages incurred to the property as long as the lease was in there
      name. Erik signed the papers and paid the landlord in cash a six
      month advance, so no questions were asked and there whereabouts
      where kept secret. The brotherhood moved in and started to stake
      out their rooms.
      Mystique insisted on having her own bedroom, much to Erik's
      disappointment. This left four men to share two bedrooms.
      "Don't worry `bout me." Sabretooth happily chirped as he
      carried in his sleeping bag which was actually a collection of furs
      that he'd piled together and rolled up into a bundle for easy
      transporting. "You know where I'll be." And with that he opened a
      window and started to climb onto the roof.
      "Where the hell IS he going?" Pyro wondered strangely.
      "Creed's rather fond of perching." Erik mildly explained
      the huge felinoid's habits to the newest member of the brotherhood.
      "The bloody wanker's got a lot of quirks, but we love him,"
      Toad smirked as they heard the heavy foot steps pounding above there
      "Well…" Erik then asserted himself. "That settles things
      rather nicely. I take this room, and you two can have that one."
      Toad and Pyro looked dreadfully at each other.
      "No thanks… I'll take the couch," Pyro sounded depressed as
      he began to walk down the stairs. He was beginning to wonder if
      coming over to the brotherhood was such a great idea after all when
      he heard an ominous sound coming from the roof. A creaking,
      crackling noise that seemed to get louder by the second. Suddenly
      just as everyone heard Sabretooth's howl the roof gave way and he
      came crashing through the roof through Mystique's bed room, which
      was on the second floor, through the living room, narrowly missing
      Pyro, on the first floor and finally ended up in the unfinished
      "I'm OK. I'm OK." Sabretooth reassured his colleagues as
      he climbed out of the new pit in the middle of the living room.
      "Like any of us care." Mystique quipped as she came down
      the stairs in a huff.
      "Surely we're staying HERE any more!" Pyro insisted.
      "Fine… fine," Erik gave up and threw his hands in the
      air. "We'll stay at a hotel tonight and look for somewhere new
      tomorrow." The group left the house in shambles and began searching
      for a hotel. The only one open was a ringky dingky "No-tell Motel"
      type of hotel just on the other side of town.
      "I only have one room left so all of you will have to
      share," The night manager said as he greedily counted the extra
      money Erik threw at him. Pyro shook his head, `Wonder if Charles
      would take me back,' he thought to himself just as he heard Mystique
      once again scream "Mouse!" while Toad and Sabretooth once more
      chased the rodent around the property trying to catch it first.
      –THE END
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