FAN FIC: RENTER'S BLUES
- In honor of Griff getting a new apartment
By Linda J.
Disclaimer: yeah, yeah, yeah, they're not mine, I don't own them,
they won't make me rich!
Setting: Takes place after X2
Summery: The brotherhood is looking for a new headquarters
"It's not much to look at " The landlord warned the strange and
rather odd looking group as he opened the front door. "But it's the
only furnished dwelling place I have right now."
"It will do nicely." Erik assertively declared before he even saw
the inside the aged two story house.
"Um some things may need a little fixin'. The older white normal
looking male explained as the rest of the group slowly strolled into
the house examining what was probably become their new hide
out. "I'll get to them soon. I promise"
Pyro leaned over to whisper to Mystique who had taken the form of an
ordinary looking woman. "Like hell he will."
She gave him a flirtatious smile. This young juicy boy was next on
her "hit" list and winked. "Have you ever known a normie who wasn't
a born liar?"
Magneto gave the two mutants a harsh `keep quiet' look and began to
rush the landlord over to the side to discuss the leasing
"Hey!" The ferocious mutant known to most as Sabretooth bellowed as
he started walking up the stairs, "Can we keep animals in here?"
"You better hope we can." Toad who was testing with all the light
switches, spoke in a teasing manner. "Otherwise, you'll have to stay
*Grrrrrrrr* Victor gave his quasi friend a threatening look but
chose to ignore his remark for the moment at least and continued to
walk up the stairs.
Mystique and Pyro made their way to the kitchen. It was dingy and
the walls were covered with old faded and poorly designed wall-paper
and the ceiling was covered with water spots from the leaking roof.
Pyro walked over to the double sink and looked at the rust stains
and dripping faucet. He nervously played with his lighter opening
and closing it's lid with even more fervor then usual, perhaps the
annoying noise it made was John's way of unconsciously expressing
his dissatisfaction to his new home.
Meanwhile, Mystique opened the door to the pantry and flipped the
light switch on. Suddenly, the cool, calm, commanding and ever in
control Mystique came running from the kitchen screaming at the top
of her lungs!
"AAAAAAGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!" She cried. "Mouse!"
"Um yeah, yeah," The landlord tried to explain away the
problem. "The last tenants were a bunch of slobs never cleaned up
after themselves. We've been trying to get rid of the pests for a
couple of weeks now, but there might still be a couple of rodents
hanging around. A few bugs too but nothing really bad."
"Then you live here and we'll take YOUR house!" Pyro threatened the
landlord only to have Magneto grab him by the shoulder and whirl him
around to speak to him.
"This place will suit our needs just fine young man. Now " Magneto
used a caring and fatherly voice, go check on Mystique. She is
probably hiding in the van.
At that moment both Toad and Sabretooth were making a mad dash into
"Mouse? Where?" Sabretooth asked excitedly as he leaped from the
balcony onto the living room floor with a thud.
"It's mine!" Toad yelled. "I was here first!"
A moment later both Erik and the landlord could hear the two mutants
in the kitchen struggling to get the mouse first. "I called it!"
Sabretooth growled as Toad kicked him into wall.
"Too bad, you mangy ol' cat!" Toad retorted as Sabretooth through a
kitchen chair at him. *crash*
"Ah! There it is!" The mouse was hiding in the corner of the room
for dear life.
*ZAP* and suddenly the mouse was in Toad's mouth and swallowed on
"Don't feel bad Vic." Toad tried to comfort Sabretooth before his
temper got the best of him. "I'll let you have the next one."
The landlord looked at Erik and made sure he pointed out the part of
the lease that said the renter was responsible for paying for all
damages incurred to the property as long as the lease was in there
Erik signed the papers paid the landlord in cash a six month advance
so long as no questions were asked and there whereabouts where kept
The brotherhood moved in and started to stake out there rooms.
Mystique insisted on having her own bedroom, much to Erik's
disappointment. This left four men to share two bedrooms.
"Don't worry `bout me." Sabretooth happily chirped as he carried in
his sleeping bag which was actually a collection of furs that he
piled together and rolled up into a bundle for easy transporting.
"You know where I'll be." And with that he opened a window and
started to climb onto the roof.
"Where the hell IS he going?" Pyro wondered strangely.
"Creed's rather fond of perching." Erik mildly explained the huge
felinoid's habits to the newest member of the brotherhood.
"The bloody wanker's got a lot of quirks, but we love him." Toad
smirked as they heard the heavy foot steps pounding above there
"Well " Erik then asserted himself. "That settles things rather
nicely. I take this room, and you two can have that one."
Toad and Pyro looked dreadfully at each other.
"No thanks I'll take the couch." Pyro sounded depressed as he began
to walk down the stairs.
He was beginning to wonder if coming over to the brotherhood was
such a great idea after all when he heard an ominous sound coming
from the roof. A creaking, crackling noise that seemed to get louder
by the second. Suddenly just as everyone heard Sabretooth's howl the
roof gave way and he came crashing through the roof through
Mystique's bed room which was on the second story floor through the
living room narrowly missing Pyro on the first story floor and
finally ended up in the unfinished basement.
"I'm OK. I'm OK." Sabretooth reassured his colleagues as he climbed
out of the new pit in the middle of the living room.
"Like any of us care." Mystique quipped as she came down the stairs
in a huff.
"Surely we're staying HERE any more." Pyro insisted.
"Fine fine" Erik gave up and threw his hands in the air. "We'll stay
at a hotel tonight and look for somewhere new tomorrow."
The group left the house in shambles and began searching for a
hotel. The only one open was a ringky dingky "No-tell Motel" type of
hotel just on the other side of town.
"I only have one room so you'll have to share" The night manager
said as he greedily counted the extra money Erik threw at him.
Pyro shook his head,
`Wonder if Charles would take me back.' He thought to himself just
as he heard Mystique scream "Mouse." While Toad and Sabretooth once
more chased the rodent around the property trying to catch it
first. THE END