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FIC: Through My Eyes: The End is the Begining 7/7

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  • autumnleaves@autumnpenguins.com
    Title: The End is the Beginning Series: Through My Eyes 7/7 * Disclaimer in part one* Previous parts can be found at: www.autumnpenguins.com
    Message 1 of 1 , Feb 6, 2003
      Title: The End is the Beginning

      Series: Through My Eyes 7/7

      * Disclaimer in part one*

      Previous parts can be found at:



      Love is Blindness. Three small words with so much meaning and
      clarity inside them. Scott is right of course because it is blindness. It
      is the one thing that can put us in danger more than any other vice on the
      planet. In a sense it is the most destructive weapon in anyone’s arsenal.
      I see that now. Love is what we hold as the highest emotion. It is
      universally celebrated, and the death of love is deemed sorrowful enough to
      refer to as heartbreak.

      I see Jean and Scott right now and I can feel their pain. Jean
      is projecting so strongly, and I want nothing more than to tell her that
      everything will be all right, that she and Scott will get over this and go
      on with their lives. But I can’t do that too her, I love her too much to
      hurt her. Though it pains me to see her struggling with this, I know I can’t
      interfere with what is to be. Scott and Jean are adults, not the lost
      children I took in all those years ago. Everybody is rooting for them to
      pull through this, but it will not be easy.

      I know Scott lays part of the blame with me, he would like to
      perhaps blame me completely but he is too noble and level headed for such
      theatrics. I haven’t spoken to Scott since he was in my office yesterday,
      but I have thought of little else since our conversation. I remember when
      he and Jean became a couple, she was 28 and he was barely 20. They were
      lucky to have Ororo as a friend. She was the one who got them together and
      assured them that the age difference would matter to nobody. All we, as
      their friends and family wanted for them was their happiness. It’s the most
      we can ask for the ones we love.

      Ororo is trying to be there for everybody, and not concerning
      herself with her own emotions. I have noticed her spending an extended
      amount of time with Rogue in the last few days. I feel it is good for her;
      the other children have been rather distant towards her since the encounter
      with Wolverine. Bobby and St. John have been the exceptions, and I pray
      their befriending of her will influence the others quickly. I don’t feel
      that she is in any danger of being completely alone though. The Wolverine
      has taken a keen interest in her, which I feel is a magnificent thing. They
      could both benefit from some attention and I think they are a good match, or
      will be one day.

      I admit it was disconcerting to speak to Rogue a day after the
      event. Her speech patterns were disturbingly like Erik’s and Logan’s.
      However, after working with Jean, Rogue is finally back to herself and is to
      meet with me in about an hour. I truly hope she chooses to stay on here. I
      think it would benefit her and the team eventually should she choose to go
      down that road. I have no designs for her future, but I can’t deny that I
      think she would be a great asset with a few years of training. I’d
      understand though if she didn’t wish to join us, but I am an optimist at

      The tangled love lives of the inhabitants of this mansion have
      always been a cause for happiness and at times worry, but never so much as
      now. We have all been forced to look at the dark side of love and examine
      if we have it in us to carry on. Sacrifices will need to be made at many
      ends. Love always requires sacrifice, even when it is a pure sacrifice.
      Love can be a beautiful thing and it always has an element of magic too it.

      But if we’re not careful it can consume us and twist a beautiful thing into
      something ugly. Love can lead us to abuse, manipulation, death and hate. I
      have seen the happy things that love brings, the caring, the intimacy, the
      friendship and just generally feeling content. I am afraid that that time
      is over for us. I am afraid that it has been over for a long time and I was
      too blind to see it.

      Erik has manipulated me. He’s been using me to gain information
      about the X-Men, and I am ashamed to say he succeeded. I told him more than
      I ever should have. It is an unleveled playing field that my team is on and
      it is entirely my fault. Erik is intelligent enough to devise a way to
      track the X-Jet. He knew they would be there and he knew how to trap them.
      I failed to see what his motivations were for asking the questions. I
      failed my team for not being vigilant enough to know what was happening. It
      is a mistake I can’t afford to make again.


      "I hate trees. They're so tall, and arogant." -Eric, 'That 70's Show'

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