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Fic: "Trapped In Darkness" R (22/?) [Logan/Rogue, Scott/Jean]

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  • Nadja Lee
    Hi all, I know, I know....*hides under the table*...this fic is long overdue. So sorry for the long wait. Where were we? Oh, yeah....Ororo was believed killed
    Message 1 of 1 , Jan 5, 2003
      Hi all,
      I know, I know....*hides under the table*...this fic is long overdue. So sorry for the long wait.
      Where were we? Oh, yeah....Ororo was believed killed but was in reality with BT. And now what you all asked me to write....how Ororo's doing...
      Warning: Brief mention of murder and torture.
      Read the first 21 parts here:


      Part 22:

      “ Ororo?” Black Thunder asked a he entered his room. He heard crying from the bathroom and hurried in there. He saw Ororo on the floor before the mirror, her body and hair wet from a shower and a towel wiped loosely around her body.

      “ Ororo, what is it?” He asked concerned as he carefully pressed her closer to him. She didn’t pull back but leaned in closer. She had lived with him for a month now and although she missed the others she had quickly adapted and accepted that she couldn’t leave. But that didn’t mean she couldn’t plan. She had come up with one plan after another of how to rescue her team-mates, one more unlikely than the other. She had without hesitation told him of her plans of trying to rescue the others, only four days after he had brought her to his room. He had doubted her sanity for first of all telling him and second of all by the nature of her plans which had often been more fiction than have any hold on reality. She had asked him to help her try and break the others free and although he had protested that he really wanted to just be here, with her, as safe as they’ll ever be, he couldn’t say no to her. He had long missed a woman in his life. Someone to live for and he didn’t want to lose her so he had agreed to try and help her. After all he did want to see the others freed, all of them but he just seriously doubted that such a wish had any hold at all in reality and his own survival would have to come first, as it always had.

      Most of her plans had started with them getting the collars off and she using her powers over the elements to push resistance down. His powers of healing and flight could do little in a fight. For all intends and purposes, he’ll be useless in a battle, at least power wise. She’ll have to be the one to save them. But it all came back to getting the collars off and even he didn’t know how they came off so they were back to square one.

      “ The...mirror…my body….my hair…,” she whispered as tears fell from her eyes and onto his shirt as she leaned against his shoulder. Black Thunder stroked her hair. She had been so strong all through the first four weeks. Even at night when she had awoken with a scream or when she had flickered at his gentlest touch she had refused to talk about it, she had dedicated herself to find a way to free the others. Why had she broken down now? Was it the mirror? He never should have brought it but he thought a woman would have liked to see herself so he had found one and put it up last night.

      “ What is it with your body?” he asked softly as she drew back from him. She looked at him with fury in her eyes.

      “ Are you blind? I’m hideous. See these marks…see my hair!” She demanded and showed the burn marks on her arms which had left small circles and her chopped hair which had left her once so long and beautiful white hair as only a few inches of white on the top of her head.

      “ I see but you’re not ugly. Your beauty shines in your eyes. It was those eyes…those brave eyes which held me up through that night when they took you,” he whispered and stroked her cheek. For the first time, she didn’t draw back.

      “ Hold me,” she whispered and he held her close. She moved her lips to him and he deepened the kiss.

      “ It this what you want?” he asked as they drew back, desire flaming in his eyes. He wanted her, had from the first moment he saw her but he wanted her to be sure of what she was doing. To seek comfort in his arms was one thing but to seek comfort in his lovemaking was another.

      “ Yes, I need this,” she whispered and ran a finger over his lips. He caught her hand and kissed it.

      “ I know you do but do you want this?” he whispered and Ororo turned away from him.

      “ You…you don’t want me?” she asked in a tiny tone. She had been right. She was ugly. Black Thunder took her under the chin and forced her head to him again but she still looked down in shame. Maybe it had all been her fault. Maybe that was why he didn’t ….

      “ Ororo, look at me,” he asked and slowly she did. “ You are the world’s most beautiful woman and I do want you but I can wait. We can wait. I want to do this when you want to. When you are ready to feel something for me,” he said softly and she nodded.

      “ Have you ever….you know...had someone?” she asked as she leaned against him and he pulled the towel closer around her so she wouldn’t freeze.

      “ I was married once,” he replied tonelessly. She turned and looked at him.

      “ Really? I thought you told me mutants can’t marry. That was why Peter and Kitty didn’t,” she said. Black Thunder told her things from the outside and how the others were doing but she suspected that he hid the darkest things from her. Today he had seemed very grim when he had entered but she hadn’t noticed before now. She hoped that everything was alright.

      “ Normally they can’t. My wife…was a gift from the Captain.”

      Ororo stared shocked at him and drew back.

      “ A gift?! A woman was a gift? And you accepted?” she asked furiously.

      “ What would you have me do? Had I said no she’ll have been killed and I punished. That wouldn’t have served a purpose,” he reached for her and she let him gather her back into his arms.

      “….Did you love her?” she asked quietly and wondered why that question was so hard for her to ask. It wasn’t like she felt anything for her rescuer. Or did she? It was only gratitude and friendship…wasn’t it?

      “ Silver Moon was a fine wife and mother. I grew to love her,” he said as he became lost in memories. Silver Moon smiling at him, her cooking for him, them making love and her holding their baby son in her arms. His son who had only lived a few hours.

      “How did she die?” Ororo asked and hold his hand in hers. Even though he didn’t talk about his grief she felt it inside him.

      “ She was killed. We had a mutual friend, Davis, a white human man. The first and ONLY human I have ever trusted…and see what it brought me?……Silver Moon valued him highly and had carelessly told him of the child she was expecting,” now his voice held suppressed anger and bitterness.

      “ You disagreed? You wouldn’t have told your best friend?”

      “ In here you have no friends only potential enemies. Silver Moon should have known that but she was too trusting,” sadness had entered his voice now.

      “ What happened?” she asked gently, sympathy in her voice.

      “ What happened? It went as it must…he told the captain and hours after our son was born beneath the stars therefore the name we gave him, Star Child, soldiers surrounded us and Silver Moon and Star Child were killed,” his voice threatened to break down. He had wanted to die that day. He had even pleaded with the captain to let him join his family but he had refused. He had still need for him, he had said. He couldn’t tell Ororo the whole truth. How Star Child had been killed, how the captain had tortured his mind and body……….how in the end………he had killed Silver Moon, his own wife.

      “ How did you move on?” she asked, tears in her eyes for him.

      “ I didn’t. They wiped my memory of the incident to prevent me from ‘doing some irrational’ like rebelling or trying to kill myself,” he remembered that day. That terribly day where he had woken up from the haze of torture, blood and pain….only to find that he had killed her. The one woman he loved. The captain was right; he could make him do anything.

      “ It happened five years ago and slowly over the years, I have begun to remember more and more details of our life together but the feelings are gone. I remember the actions as one would a book read long ago but….I feel only from those pictures. I do not recall loving Silver Moon but through the pictures I see, I know the feeling to have been there,” he admitted and wiped her tears away. The day he had recalled Silver Moon’s murder…….recalled her pleading with him to stop, to remember their love, to fight the darkness, the control, the pain………the confusion…….he had remembered it all. Only the fact that he didn’t remember his feelings as he had thrust the knife into her chest had saved him from going totally mad.

      “ How can you talk about it so...casually? They took away your life…your memories!” Ororo protested as he tightened his arms around her. She had noticed that his voice hadn’t changed from its usual low whisper like tone he always used. She wondered if he had adapted that tight control over his emotions and learned to use that kind of voice due to fear of punishment when younger.

      “ I’m not the first and I won’t be the last. If not we find a way out of here before your friend…Kitty gives birth….it’ll go her and Peter the same way,” Black Thunder said softly and a shiver ran through Ororo.

      “ Then we just have to free them before the child is born,” she said determined.

      “ If only we could but it’s a mere fantasy,” he whispered pessimistically.

      “ Have you no hope left? Have they really broken you so?” she asked softly and planted a soft kiss on his cheek, her eyes filled with heartbreaking sadness for him.

      “ This place leaves no room for being human for to them you are not human. You hide your emotions and try to survive. This place either breaks you or change you,” he said and pulled her close, his hand intertwining with hers.

      “ And you changed. They stripped you of your humanity,” she whispered sadly as she felt his lips touch the top of her head.

      “ That’s right, Wind Rider. Make no mistake; if it serves my purpose I’m ruthless and I’ll not hesitate to kill,” the words were softly spoken but Ororo knew the truth in them but also the warning.

      “ Would you harm me if it served your purpose?” she asked boldly.

      “…No, never that!” he admitted and Ororo smiled.

      “ Then you DO have some humanity left after all,” she said softly and brought her lips to his and their lips met in a kiss. A kiss promising more. Promising something greater. Promising love….someday…

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