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Fic: Misunderstandings, L/M, 15

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  • Alana Helbling
    Please ignore earlier message, damn comp got it wrong! Fic: Misunderstandings (Or Telepaths can be Match-makers too!) Disclaimer: I no own, so you no sue,
    Message 1 of 1 , Dec 3, 2002
      Please ignore earlier message, damn comp got it wrong!

      Fic: Misunderstandings (Or Telepaths can be Match-makers too!)

      Disclaimer: I no own, so you no sue, comprende?

      Rating: 15 in da UK, not sure in Amreica

      Feedback: Yeah, but first fic, so be gentle!!, to alana_helbling@...

      Archive: you’re kidding me? You’d want this? (If so just let me know, but sure!)


      It started out fine.

      Logan came back, ruffled my hair after hugging me hello, shot a heated look at Jean, and then went to unpack. He didn’t give the bike keys back, but that was just to annoy Scott.

      Then we did the friendship thing. Or tried to. But we had to work at it at first. I mean, sure, I’d been in his head, and I knew what he found funny, what would piss him off, and what would cause him to hurt. But that didn’t mean I knew how to talk to him as a person. If anything, it made it more difficult, because some of the stuff I knew he could do, well, I had to work to forget it around him or I’d just have stood there with my mouth dropped open in admiration.

      And then there’s the little fact that in his head, the box with my name on it contained very little content. As a matter of fact, at first I think it only contained three things.

      I couldn’t be touched.
      I was from the South and was heading North, originally.
      I disliked being kidnapped by the Brotherhood.

      So, after the first few sticky moments where neither of us could think of anything to say, we settled down, and tried to trust each other, and for the most part succeeded.

      Then I overheard something that made me think again.

      The link from Alkali Lake had turned up nothing. That was common knowledge. So the professor had been working with him to remove the memory blocks from around his previous life. Now Logan was not fond of this idea at all. No siree. As a matter of fact, the base of our friendship was probably formed from when the Prof. Had just sprung the idea on him, and he’d track me down to talk to me about his feelings on the matter. Listening to him spill all his insecurities and worries to me over this was what probably gave me the strength to ignore my little crush and focus on Logan, my trying-to-be-friend rather than Logan object-of-my-steamy-teenage-affections. After much brow beating and soul searching he decided to go along with it. And it was fine. Until Jean took over his treatment.

      It was never supposed to happen, but on the day the Prof and Logan were supposed to be having an intense training session, something major came up in Washington, which required the Professor to be there. But their appointment couldn’t just be rescheduled – if they left it, the barriers would work their way back up, and they would have to start all over. So Jean had to do it.

      That meant Logan had to trust her with the entire contents of his mind as completely as he’d trusted the Professor, and, to some extent, me. And Logan doesn’t like trusting people, so adding yet another person to his list of people-that-know-everything-about-me was not his favourite idea in the world. But he did it. And that’s where the trouble started.

      Logan’s feelings about Jean were fairly well known and accepted. So I didn’t really mean to pay such attention to part of a conversation I heard through a door. Really. I was supposed to be meeting with Jubes to discuss what we’d be doing to celebrate our 19th birthdays. So standing outside the door of the maths classroom where Logan and Jean were having their session was not where I was supposed to be.

      "Logan, I, I can’t believe you’d think…. My God, I just don’t believe it!"

      What, so Logan had propositioned Jean? Big deal, we all knew it would happen.


      "I mean, Logan, what are you thinking? There’s no way-"

      "Yeah Jean, I know. Which is why I’m not telling Rogue."

      OK, that hurt. They’ve obviously done something together which he sees fit to keep from me...

      "Well, I must admit that that’s sensible, but this, this problem needs to be addressed…"

      "Yeah, well I’m taking care of it, so if you’re smart you won’t tell anyone else. Especially Scott."

      The last phrase was muttered, and was swiftly followed by a ‘mumph’ like someone trying to say something but being stopped by something covering his or her mouth.

      Like someone else’s lips.

      I couldn’t take any more. I ran outside and into the garage. Mentally giving the finger to my inner Logan, I took the most impractical car in there, and went and burnt out my new credit card.

      By the time I came back that afternoon my mind was made up. I had to talk to him about it – I couldn’t just pretend I hadn’t heard what I had, and besides the fact he didn’t want to tell me, most important was the fact that he was heading for a broken heart.

      And I wasn’t sure I was up to picking up the pieces.

      He wasn’t around at dinner, nor was he in when I knocked on his door, although he’d left it unlocked. I let myself in and settled down on his bed to wait him out.

      I guess I must have fallen asleep because the next thing I saw was his face scowling down at me.


      It started out fine.

      I came home, and pulled up into the garage with Marie beaming and throwing herself at me, Jean sending out her I’m-gorgeous-and-I-know-it vibes, and Scott glaring at me with looks that could kill.

      No pun intended.

      I was home to stay for a while. Actually I really couldn’t imagine myself leaving voluntarily in the foreseeable future, but I kept the keys to piss Scooter off, who of course immediately started trying to warn everyone who’d listen not to get too attached ‘cause I’d be taking off again soon. No one had the good sense to believe what was wishful thinking on his part. Heh – stupid pansy.

      Me and Marie became close. ‘Course it helped she was the one I spilled my guts to about how worried I was about the Professor creeping around in my head looking for memories.

      It wasn’t the memories I was worried about him finding. It was the remnants of the daydreams that had started slinking up on me ever since the week after I left. The ones that involved a naked, touchable, writhing Marie in a multitude of positions and places, all of which included an equally naked, touchable and writhing me. She was wearing a bearskin in some, was pregnant in a couple.

      And one even had her in a wedding dress.

      Sweet Jesus, how was I gonna explain this to wheels?

      I decided pre-warned was pre-armed, so one morning I just strode into his office and was more honest to him than I had been to myself.

      Yes, I wanted Marie, despite the fact that she was barely legal.

      Yes, most of my waking hours since this realisation had been taken up with various fantasies of her, so if he was gonna go rummaging through my head, he was gonna come across more than a few of them.

      Yes, since I had realised this I had ceased to feel desire for any other woman – including Jean.

      No, this had never happened before, even during that long week I had thought I was in love with Jean.

      And finally in a very small voice inside my head, I admitted my last point:

      Yes, I think I love her.

      He still heard me.

      He just nodded gravely, and said that my business was exactly that - my business. Thank you for warning him, and he’d do his best to ignore and forget anything he thought was private, now would I please excuse him, as he had to prepare for a meeting with a prospective pupil. Then he said something I nearly didn't believe as he wheeled himself out of the door of his office.

      In truth, if you took into account my memory loss and the effects of her mutation, the age difference really wasn’t existent anymore, so I should stop worrying about it so much. And then he winked at me, and disappeared around a corner.

      I don’t think I could have told you what happened the rest of that afternoon if WWIII had started, I was so in shock. Then Marie came home from some mechanics conference she had been to in the city, and I shook my self out of it, and started planning.

      Too bad I never got to carry any of them out.

      The meeting Charles (as he’d asked me to call him – in truth all of the adults did in private) got called away to was a genuine emergency. Something similar to the mutant registration act but worse – in truth he was so anxious about it, his explanation of what it was to me didn’t quite make sense, but that wasn’t what was important.

      Jean would be taking over my training for an entire week. Not long enough for us to make any significant breakthroughs together, but long enough that she would have seen what I didn’t want her too. But it was either that or start all over, and there was no way I was gonna do that.

      The sooner I found the past the sooner I could get to grips – literally – with my future, was my line of thinking, one sunny afternoon as I sat in the garden, watching Marie twirl a piece of hair around her finger as she read, and the professor went roaring off down the drive with Ororo as a chauffeur. One hour later I was off to my session, hoping I could get it over with quickly. Of course it could never be that simple.

      We had barely begun when she came across one of them – it wasn’t actually too explicit by my standards, but she still reacted as though I’d poured boiling liquid into her lap.

      "Logan, how, how…?"

      "Yes Jean the professor knows."

      Maybe that would shut her up.

      "Logan, I, I can’t believe you’d think…. My God, I just don’t believe it!".

      Yeah didn’t think so, but if she’d just listen,


      "I mean, Logan, what are you thinking? There’s no way-"

      I don’t care if you think there’s no way, and what I plan to do about it, but maybe if I pretend I think it’s as wrong as you do you’ll shut up.

      "Yeah Jean, I know. Which is why I’m not telling Rogue."

      "Well, I must admit that that’s sensible, but this, this problem needs to be addressed…"

      Jesus Christ – problem? That is irony coming from you Red’, Miss-I’m-8-yrs-older-than-my-fiancee. Oh crap, if she tells Scooter I’m gonna be out on my butt faster than you can blink. Shit, can’t let that happen-

      "Yeah, well I’m taking care of it," and you wouldn’t like how, " so if you’re smart you won’t tell anyone else. Especially Scott." Come on doc, get the hint…

      It was then I caught the scent, one laced with sadness and misery, one that I should’ve noticed a hell of a lot sooner if I hadn’t been distracted. Jean had started to say something more, so I put my hand over her mouth so I could concentrate on it, and no sooner did her muffled noise of protest reach my ears than I heard frantic footsteps down the hall. She’d heard us.


      It was time to come clean. That was the only way I could see out of this, and I was praying that even if she didn’t want to at least give us a try she’d let us remain friends. It wasn’t much of a chance, but it was better than what I had at that moment in time, which was exactly nothing.

      She didn’t come back until the evening, but by four I’d decided that I needed to get off the school grounds to sort out what I was gonna say to her, and without much effort ended up at a bar.

      Surprise surprise.

      Three hours, an astonished bartender and two comatose drunks later I was on my way back, only to be forestalled by 90 minutes when I discovered that one of the aforementioned drunk’s friends had took upon himself to give me a little payback via the means of the bike. So it was actually more like five hours, two cops, a bartender and four comatose drunks/idiots I arrived home.

      Needless to say I wasn’t in the best of moods.

      She wasn’t in her room, but a fresh scent trail led me to mine, to find her crashed out on my bed, all wrapped up in my blanket. God, did she look cute, and sweet.

      And so goddamn hot. What with the view and the dregs of alcohol still in my system and the fact that she now smelt more like us than her, well, none of it was helping my mental state. My mind went back to what I had planned to say to her, which was by no means mushy, but it still brought a lump to my throat that I couldn’t speak around.

      Hey, it was the closest thing to an emotional confession I’d done in a long time.

      Well, not if you counted Jean and Charles, but this was to the one person who actually mattered, dammit.

      Sighing, I went with plan B – the ‘what-the-hell-were-you-eavesdropping-on-me-for-don’t-you-know-I’d-tell-you-anything?’ one. That started off with me being mad, so I slapped on my best I’m-gonna-kill-someone face and nudged her awake.

      Then she opened those gorgeous chocolate eyes with an adorably confused look on her face, and I was lost.


      Logan speaking

      ~Logan thinking~

      Marie speaking

      ~Marie thinking~]

      "Hey there sugar,"

      ~Oh my god, did I just call him sugar? Shit I did, dammit, thought I’d gotten past that.~

      ~Sugar? I like it. Of Course I’d like it even better if she was purring it after…No, have to straighten things out first.~

      "Hey there. Mind telling me what you’re doing on my bed darlin’?"

      ~Darlin’? Oh God, didn’t mean to call her that. And o’ course I’d have her on my bed full time if I could…~

      ~Darling? He called me darling? Oh my God, no down hormones, he’s just been drinking, that’s all, yup I can smell the booze. Of course it’s physically impossible for him to get drunk, but I’m not going to think about that until I’ve gotten this out.~

      "Logan, I overheard you talking to Jean this afternoon, and I didn’t mean to, but I did and I’ve got to tell you some stuff before you go any further, so, so just stay quiet and hear me out."

      ~Oh God, look at his face. He really didn’t want me knowing, he looks like he’s going to be sick. Maybe I ought to just tell him it’s not a good idea and stop, it’ll probably cause him less pain.~

      ~Oh God she’s gonna agree with Jean. She’s gonna say she doesn’t even think we should try. Shit this is gonna be hard to listen to. Glad I kept those keys, I might need to take off after this, I can already feel that lump in my throat coming back.~


      ~Good, he’s gonna at least listen.~
      "I’m just going to say I think it’s a bad idea, and that people are going to get hurt. I’m sure you can work out why, and I’m going to leave what I say at that."

      ~There, leaves him plenty of options, and I didn’t guilt trip him hardly at all and – oh he looks even worse. What did I say that was so bad? Come on Marie, think, before he slips away from you altogether…~

      ~She doesn’t think it’s gonna be a good idea, and won’t say why. Well, it’s pretty damn obvious why. Chuck, you were wrong, the age did matter, and the drinking, and swearing, and the fighting. Oh baby, don’t give up when we haven’t even started, I’ll change, I’ll beg, don’t push me away…~

      "I think it could work," ~Could I have sounded any more sorry for myself?~

      "I can change, really, if I work really hard, I’m sure it’ll work, I mean, I just want a chance…"

      ~God, baby, please, just one chance, one little chance, a week, a day, an hour. I’ll make you so happy, I promise…~

      ~God, he sounds so desperate, and he thinks he can make her leave Scott. Oh, he loves her so much, it’s not fair on him, why does she have to play with his heart – I never thought she was this cruel, but she’s a telepath, how can she not know?~

      "Logan don’t you see? You shouldn’t have to change to be in a relationship that works. If you are it’s the other person that doesn’t deserve you, not the other way around…"

      ~Please Logan, don’t let her break you, you’re worth so much more than she is…~

      ~No, baby please, I’m asking for you, don’t turn this around and give my that not good enough bullshit, I know I’m making you feel guilty, but one chance, and I’ll leave you alone. Please.~

      "I know, but if it’s the only way…Don’t you see Marie, if I had just one chance I could prove it, I know I could, that’s all I’m asking, please?"

      ~Come on darlin’, just nod that pretty little head of yours, I’ll make you smile so much, I won’t even let the nightmares get you if I have to stay up all night to guard you sleeping, please baby please,~

      ~Oh God, why is he asking me? Does he think I can put in a good word with her or something?~

      "Logan, I’ll be honest, I don’t know what to say. It’s pretty clear how your feelings are on this," ~God baby, please just say yes, or even maybe, I can work with that too…~ "But it’s not like I can answer for her or anything, but I’ll speak to her about it if you want…"

      ~OK, wasn’t that what he wanted? Now he just looks down right confused.~

      ~She’ll talk to her for me? What’s…~

      "Baby, what are you talking about? You’ll talk to who for me?"

      ~OK, now that’s a look I haven’t seen before. Complete confusion, yup, that would be it…~

      ~Oh God, sugar, I need you to stay sane for this conversation, if you would?~

      "Jean, Logan. I said I’d talk to her for you. Wasn’t that what you asked me to do?"

      ~Jean? Where the hell did she pop into this conversation?~

      "Jean? Baby, what does Jean have to do with any of this?"

      ~OK, that’s the second time he’s called me baby in two sentences. And what does he mean, what does Jean have to do with this?~

      "Well, she’s the one you’ve been professing your undying love for, for, yah know, the last 10 minutes. And she the one I overheard you propositioning in the math room this morning. And the one you just asked me to help you get a chance with…"

      ~OK that was crabby, but I don’t like being confused…~

      ~I love…Propositioned…Oh my darlin’, I’m sorry Marie, but I just have to…~


      "Mumph – LOGAN! Are you insane? you know how my skin works, and why did you just kiss me? You’re in love with J-"

      "Complete that thought and I’ll do it again. Darlin’, oh baby, I’m sorry if I gave you the wrong impression, but I love YOU. I was asking for a chance to be with YOU. If you’ll have me. I just didn’t think yo- Mumph!"

      "Sorry, Logan, but, I, OH you idiot!! Why couldn’t you just come out and say that huh? Why’d you have to make me worry you were going to get your heart broken? God, do you know what I’ve been through all afternoon?"

      "I’m sorry, sweetheart, but it can’t be anything to what I just went through the last 10 minutes, and, baby, I was gonna, but you looked so fuckin’ gorgeous I couldn’t, and, darlin’ please don’t cry…"

      "It’s OK Logan, they’re happy tears, and, god, I love you so much, but in future, if there’s ever something you can’t say, please, just write it down!!"

      "Will do darlin’, now c’mere…"


      Logan and Rogue announced their engagement last night. Jean and I have decided to withhold the small parts we played in their relationship indefinitely. For one, it would mean admitting we broke doctor-patient confidence, even if it was by accident through a telepathic link (and one which initially gave us the idea of how to get them together..) and it may not help all involved parties put more trust in Jean if they learnt she was such a consummate actress. So for now, this will be our little secret…Although we both have agreed that the steamy looks Jubilee and Remy have been sending each other must be dealt with sooner rather than later, but then again, a telepath’s job is never done I suppose…

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