mini fan fic: Most Strange contract (complete)
- MOST STRANGE CONTRACT
Why You Should Never Ask Sabretooth about His Work
by Linda J.
DISCLAIMERS: Sabretooth ain't mine; my husband wouldn't let me have
him anyway. Hehehe
Me on the other hand, well I guess I have to claim ownership there.
RATING: PG13+ violence and language
FEEDBACK: YES, YES, Y-E-S adnilnosnhoj@...
ARCHIEVE: Not a problem; just let me know so I can tell my friends
where to find it.
SUMMERY: just a little snipette really, about Sabretooth telling me
about his job.
Recently one morning Sabretooth and I were enjoying a beautiful
Canadian sun-raise together. We sat at a picnic bench on the park
grounds and had our usual morning coffee and rolls for breakfast.
We had slept the night before using only fur pelts as our bedding and
covers as we slept peacefully under the starry sky.
It was at times like that I cannot even fathom the fact that same man
who tells me jokes, who sings me love songs, and sometimes gets into
an innocent snowball fight with me; is a cold blooded killer. And not
just a cold blooded killer, but set him off just right, and he
becomes something that cannot be described as anything less than
That morning over our coffee, I asked him about killing; what did he
think of it, why did people hire him to kill and what was the
strangest contract he ever had.
He seemed almost glad to talk about it, as if he was honored to have
someone take an interest in his workmanship.
He considered my first question carefully before answering.
"Well, killing is a lot like fucking in a way. Hell, I know I get a
hard on every time." He smiled a little and continued. "I've killed
people in all kinds of ways, but I think its best when I'm using my
bare hands. I feel like I'm GOD." He chuckles. "I guess in a way I'm
playing God; but so do doctors and cops and politicians " His mind
drifts off for a moment as he considers his words. He then jumps onto
my second question.
"Most people call on me mostly out of fear. Well they say its
jealousy " Sabretooth then gazes off in a cat-like stare, "but in
reality, it's all about fear.
A man says he is jealous over his wife; but what that really means is
he is afraid of her. Afraid she will find someone better, afraid she
will take his money, afraid he's raisin' somebody's bastard child."
Sabretooth then pauses and takes a sip of his coffee.
"Or say a businessman hires me to eliminate his competitor; again;
fear." He then shakes his head at the whole mess going on in his mind.
"They can fool themselves and say it's a crime of passion. They can
say it's for love, or for their country, or or for their loved ones
but truth be known, people kill or in this case pay me to do the
dirty work for `em because we're all just a bunch of scared little
rabbits, Fluff; me included." The brisk morning Canadian air fogs up
with every word of his; as if to demonstrate how heavy his words
Quite a few minutes pass before he answers my last question.
"Hmmm the strangest contract I ever had well now that's a toughy." He
half way thinks to himself out loud. Finally, he has it." Mmmm he
begins as he takes another sip. "A while back I get this call, right?
The frail on the phone offers me ten grand if I could do a job and
make it look like an accident. It had to look like an accident; that
was the interesting thing about this story got that?" He informed me
before continuing on. "So, I said sure. I mean ten grand's pretty
sweet; and I've noticed that most who hire me always have some
special little touch added in, like `make `em suffer or make it quick
and painless or make sure you tell them who's payin' for this job.' "
Sabretooth then starts to change the subject.
"Which makes me feel pretty damn good about myself; I mean, if my
client feels they can have their target KNOW who's paying for the
job, then the client most feel real confident about my work. But now
I'm getting off track aren't I." He grins as he tries to recall at
what point in his story he left off.
"Oh, yeah, like I was sayin' people like to have a special touch or
two added, so I didn't think much about the specifications; in fact I
thought the frail was just being overly careful." Sabretooth adjusts
his body weight on the bench to make him self more comfortable and
"Then I go and meet this guy away from town; out in the woods as a
matter of fact. And he's got all the money with him; most of the time
people only wanna pay part of it to insure the job is carried
through." Sabretooth leaned in towards me and helf his hands up as if
he was swearing on a Bible.
"Well, Fluff, I ain't lying to ya, the next thing this frail is
tellin' me is he wants me to kill him!"
At that point Sabretooth stops his story and takes another sip of
coffee then another.
I know that at least three or four minutes went by without the
felinoid saying another word.
He just sat on the bench looking out towards the Rockie mountain
range that stood in front of us.
"Well?" I finally get the never to ask.
"Well what?" He asked as if he had completely forgotten what we had
"Well did you?" I tactfully asked.
Sabretooth just gave me this annoyed look. "Well of course I did
woman! Ten grand is a hell of a lot of money!" He acts surprised that
I even bothered asking the question in the first place.
You can call me pushy but I just had to know. "Well, did the man ever
tell you why he wanted you to kill him?"
"Yeah." Sabretooth's face brightened as he volunteered the rest of
the story realizing what I was interested in.
"The frail was in BIG trouble over something; he had embezzled money
or something any way, he wanted to commit suicide rather than do jail
time. But if he did that, well the wife and kids could just kiss that
insurance policy good bye. So, he had me rip him up like a wild
animal so it looked like a hunting accident. As far as I know, it
went off without a hitch. He died on the spot, the wife collected a
cool quarter million and I went to Atlantic City that weekend." He
explained all this to me as if he were telling me about what he had
eaten the night before.
"Yeah I would say that's a pretty strange contract too." I added to
the conversation, as a way of reminding myself that it was my idea to
get him to talk about this stuff in the first place.
I'll never learn