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Fan Fic: I LIKE MY CHILDREN MED/RARE final segment

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  • sabretooth_purrs_in_his_sleep
    Disclaimer: Well the bottom line is I won t be making any money from this. A couple of the characters are mine, but Marvel and FOX entertainment own Sabretooth
    Message 1 of 1 , Sep 1, 2002
      Disclaimer: Well the bottom line is I won't be making any money from
      A couple of the characters are mine, but Marvel and FOX entertainment
      own Sabretooth and the other members of the brotherhood.

      SUMMERY: It's all pretty silly and just for soem laughs.
      I mean, com'on who in their right mind would let Sabretooth baby-
      RATING: PG13 adult language
      FEEDBACK: My ego thives on it! adnilnosnhoj@y...
      ARCHIEVE: Just let me know so I can tell my friends.

      Roy then had the idea to go back and get the diaper bag and stuff ut
      full of goodies. He made it back to the rec-room and to the kitchen
      again. All the way to and from the rec-room he merrily munched on
      fritos and thought to himself what a great and wonderfull man this
      Sabretooth was.
      He looked for the leather pouch Sabretooth had asked for, and he
      found the beer with no trouble. Soon he was out the door looking for
      his way outside.
      In the mean time, Sabretooth walked under a very tall, very large,
      and sturdy tree.
      Sabretooth was ignoring her crying, as best as he could, and held the
      carrier inside with one hand. He then leaped up into the tree,
      grabbing onto one of its sturdy branches with his other hand.
      From branch to branch Victor shimmied up the tree until he was nearly
      to the top. He set the handle of the baby carrier over a strong tree
      branch; one that was sturdy enough to hold her weight. She was freely
      swinging from the branch as the sea breeze "rocked the cradle" to and
      fro. He carefully covered her up with her blanket, making sure she
      could still breathe. The swinging sensation and fresh sea air put her
      to sleep within minutes and Sabretooth was finally able to sigh in
      relief. He leaned back on a tree branch himself and enjoyed a
      moment's peace. He closed his eyes and for a moment forgot all about
      Roy or even Hannah.
      He had become so used to living without cubs under his feet, it
      forgot how nice they could be to have around once in a while.
      Even if they were someone else's.

      By the time Sabretooth leaped down from the tree, Roy was outside in
      the courtyard as well, wondering where Hannah and the felinoid were.
      Sabretooth quickly noticed the boy was zipping around the yard like a
      bumble bee.
      "What's gotten inta ya, runt?" He asked as he watched Roy move about
      like his pants were full of fire ants.
      "Nothing." Roy snapped up a quick and loud answer. "I'm fine! Great!
      Haha! Here's your beer, and pouch!" He was nearly yelling, and
      drooling over himself as he moved head in every direction. "Where's
      Sabretooth looked up into the tree. "There."
      Roy looked up into the tree where his sister was sleeping.
      "Relax, kid, used to do this all the time." Sabretooth assured the
      boy. He opened his beer and chugged half of it in one swallow.
      "I ain't never had a baby fall out of a tree yet." He proudly
      announced. "Well, just once, but I caught him b'fore he hit the
      ground." Roy's eyes became the size of saucers. "Was he alright?" Roy
      Sabretooth nodded his head as he finished his beer. "Oh yeah he's was
      fine. Just a few scratches from hittin' a couple of branches on the
      way down. But you would of thought I tried ta kill him by the way his
      mama went on." The memory made Sabretooth laugh out loud. "Hehehehe I
      never saw a woman get so pissed off before!" He then added. "Hell
      hath no fiery, right kid?"
      Roy just kept looking up into the tree and started jumping up and
      down. "I want to see her! I want to see her!" He kept repeating.
      Sabretooth then recognized Roy was in the middle of one hell of a
      sugar rush.
      "Ummm…kid, I know I said you could eat what ever you wanted, but just
      curious, what exactly did you eat?"
      Roy stopped bouncing and went to swaying his body to and
      fro. "Cookies."
      "Just cookies?" Sabretooth couldn't believe just some cookies could
      bring this kind of a rush on. "Ummm…some other stuff." Roy's brain
      was buzzing so fast, he could barely keep up with his thoughts.
      Sabretooth put his hands on his hips. `I get one cub to quiet down
      and now the other one is bouncing off the damn walls.'
      "Well never mind that now. Let's try this any ways."
      Sabretooth took a few steps back to space himself from Roy. "First
      thing I want ya ta do is show me what ya got." The felinoid announced
      as he clapped his hands once to get Roy's attention. "I want ya ta
      come at me and try ta knock me down."
      "Sir," the child protested. "I can't knock a guy as big as you
      down." "Have you ever tried?" Sabretooth asked rudely. Roy shook his
      head. "Alright then; stop arguing with me. It's disrespectful. Ready,
      set, now go!"
      Roy sprinted toward the mutant with all his strength.
      A moment went by before Victor spoke. "OK, kid, get up and try it
      again." Roy was laying flat on his back watching the stars spinning
      around his head.
      "This time lower your shoulders and tuck your head in your chest a
      bit, then run into me as hard as you can."
      Slowly and some what painfully, Roy stood up and once again charged
      at Sabretooth like he a raging bull. *THUD!!*
      "Now…now that was a little better," Victor tried not to laugh. "I
      almost felt that." Victor still had his hands on his hips as he
      waited for the child to get up off the ground. This time a little
      blood dribbled from Roy's mouth where he had accidentally bit his
      tongue as he hit the ground.
      "One more time, same like before, but now before you charge at me…
      listen ta me squirt…" Victor paused and leaned down to face Roy so he
      would pay attention. "You're gonna see yerself puttin' me down,
      "You mean imagine I've already knocked you down, right?" Roy asked.
      "That's right. The only way you'll be a winner is knowin' you've
      already won." Sabretooth instructed.
      Roy caught his breath and followed the mutant's instructions. He
      cleared his head as best as the sugar in his blood would allow and
      thought of nothing but seeing Sabretooth hit the ground.
      Roy ran into Victor hard enough to make the man stagger; then Roy
      grabbed him around the knees, making them buckle as he squeezed them
      together. Roy even went so far as to growl himself in a human-like
      childish sort of way. "grrrr…" Suddenly, Sabretooth went down on his
      butt with a thump. He started to chuckle and rolled out of Roy's
      grip. "See kid. Not so hard is it? The thing you never want to forget
      is, when yer in a scrap, you can't think of nothin' else but seein'
      yerself comin' out of it on top. Got that?"
      Victor stood up and helped Roy to his feet. "OK. Here's what ya do
      when some cock sucker's standin' in front of ya.
      Take yer fingers and jab them into their throat as hard as you can.
      Like this. And don't be too proud to fight dirty. Always remember
      this: It's losers who complain about if the fight was fair or not.
      Winners just get paid, and they get laid!"
      Sabretooth demonstrated the move on Roy very slowly, and carefully;
      not to actually ram his claws into the child's neck.
      Roy marveled at Victor's hands.
      "If I had nails like yours I bet no one would bother me." He said
      enviously. Sabretooth himself looked admiringly at his hands. "Well,
      I ain't gonna lie, they're nice ta have. Wouldn't trade them fer
      nothin'. But yer wrong `bout people leavin you alone. Seems like
      somebody is always tryin' to prove somethin'. I can't go out without
      some half drunk and entirely stupid, dumb fuck picking a fight with
      Sabretooth then reached in the pouch Roy had got for him from the
      kitchen, and pulled out a dark brown piece of dried meat. "Here." He
      offered it to the boy. "You should eat some of this."
      "What is it, sir?" Roy took the meat and examined it.
      "Deer Jerky, made it myself." With that Roy took one bite. "Yea-uck!"
      Roy gagged on the meat. "This is grossest thing I've ever tried!" Roy
      Sabretooth's feelings might have been hurt, except for the fact he
      blamed Roy's poor judgment of good deer jerky on his panty waste dad
      and up-tight mother. Obviously the child had never been offered deer
      meat before, otherwise he would have been asking for more.
      "Don't be a whimp, whuss! Here, have s'more." Sabretooth handed him
      another piece and expected Roy to eat it.
      "Go on. Ya just need ta get used that wild taste. A couple more bites
      and you'll start lovin' it."
      Slowly, Roy took another bite. He tried to chew it without actually
      having it touch any taste buds.
      Then suddenly, Sabretooth slapped his back, forcing Roy to swallow
      the meat before choking on it.
      "Now that's what ya wanna eat to grow up to be a man. Want more?"
      Roy shook his head emphatically. "I don't want to be a man right now,
      The combination of the wild deer meat, mixed with too much sugar was
      working hard on Roy's stomach. "Wooooh. Sir, I don't feel so good,"
      Just then, from another part of the lair, Eric and Roy's father,
      Simon both appeared.
      Right away, the fathered noticed that his infant daughter was nowhere
      in sight. "Where's Hannah?" He was almost afraid to ask.
      Sabretooth used the same sickening sweet tone of voice Eric had heard
      him use earlier. "Sleeping like an angel." Again grinning like the
      Chessire cat.
      Eric knew when the felinoid was avoiding a question. "Oh, really.
      Where is she Sabretooth?"
      Sabretooth merely pointed a clawed finger up at the tree where
      Hannah lay blissfully asleep. "She's enjoying a little fresh air."
      "Ahhhh!!!" Simon screamed. "Get her down at once!"
      "Geeze frail; don't get yer panties in a wad! Yer cub's fine."
      Victor huffed as he climbed back into the tree to retrieve the infant.
      As he made his way toward Hannah, everyone on the ground could hear
      him complain. "They wouldn't of made a song about babies swinging
      from tree tops if it was bad fer `em!"
      Roy, in the mean time, came over to his dad. "Dad, I don't feel so
      good." He listlessly said as he grabbed on to his father's leg. Then
      suddenly, *barrrrf!* all over Eric's shoe. "Ohhh." Roy's head felt as
      if it would spin clean off his shoulders.
      "Creed!" Magneto shouted furiously.
      Sabretooth at least did not jump from the top of the tree with Hannah
      in her carrier as he could have. He shimmied down the tree about half
      way, before leaping. *Thud*
      He landed directly in front of the men who impatiently waited for him.
      "There, see? She's fine. Satisfied?" Sabretooth's mood was getting
      dark. Magneto's was getting even darker.
      "I told you Mags, this ain't no job for the `Tooth." Victor sounded
      rather pleased to prove him self right.
      Simon whisked around to look at Lehnsherr. "I think it's time for us
      to be leaving." He sounded as if he was at least trying to stay
      Had Eric thought he could not finish what the two men had begun
      together on his own, he may have kept them there against there will.
      As it was, Eric was anxious to go to his room and remove the child's
      vomit from his foot now that it had begun to seep through parts of
      his leather shoe.
      Before leaving, Roy went over to Sabretooth and reached out his hand
      to shake his. Roy thought that hugging would be too sissy-like for
      the felinoid. So, the two shook hands, much to Lehnsherr's amazement.

      Sabretooth and Magneto stood beside each other and watched Toad take
      the chopper up to take their `guests' home.
      As the sound from the chopper's engines faded in the distance, Eric
      turned to the felinoid. "If it were not for the fact that I need
      someone with your –expertise, you wouldn't have much of a life to
      look forward to I assure you." Magneto snapped at his subordinate.
      "As it is, you'll be heading out for the main land tomorrow. There's
      someone I need you to eliminate so that Mystique can take his place
      in Washington."
      "Main land," Sabretooth repeated. "Cool. But there's somethin' I
      gotta do before I go on a job."
      Magneto's eyes bulged out with surprise and anger. "Oh, and what
      might that be?"
      Sabretooth nodded his head as he watched the chopper's lights grow
      smaller and smaller. "Gonna visit some kids of mine tomorrow. It
      might take a while to get to `em all."
      Eric gave him an odd look. He went on to say, "I would have thought
      the women you sired children with, by now would have restraining
      orders on you."
      Sabretooth shook his head. "Not all of `em. Besides, restraining
      orders don't mean nothin' to the `Tooth."
      "Oh Sabretooth, by the way," Magneto thought to add. "That bonus
      you're expecting to find on your next pay check? I intend to use it
      for the new pair of leather shoes that you owe me."
      Victor just growled a bit. "Just wait `n see what I put in them shoes
      when you're sleepin' Mags." He muttered to him self as he turned and
      walked away. THE END
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