Fic: "Worth It" (1/1) PG [J,S,L]
- Worth It
By Nadja Lee 09/07/02
English is not my native language. Please forgive me my mistakes.
Disclaimer: X-men and all the characters here belong to Marvel, 20 Century Fox and I intend no infringement, this is a piece of amateur fan fiction, and I make no money of it.
Only the original idea contained within this work is the property of the author. Please do not copy this story to any website or archive without permission of the author.
Timeline: Set in the movie universe. After movie
Universe: Set in the movie universe; NOT the book which goes with it.
Summary: A discussion, a decision .is it really better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all?
Archiving: Want, ASK, take, have.
Feedback: Yes, please. My e-mail address is nadjalee2000@...
Inspired by Brendas Relax LOTR RPS SB/EW fic .if you didnt get that then dont ask *LOL*.
Her fic is (obviously) not an X-men fic and its rated NC-17. Since my story is rated much lower please e-mail me if you want the story link. Thanks.
Thanks to Estelle for the Beta.
* * *
Dont do this, dont do this. Hell break your heart. Dont do this. Youll regret it, you know you will. Only pain and heartache can ever come from this. He doesnt even feel anything for you. Hell leave you in a heartbeat. He doesnt care about you or your feelings. Please dont .dont do this. You may not be happy where you are but at least youre safe . better safe than sorry right?
But if I dont go Ill always wonder, Ill always dream. I need to know how itll be with him, I cant help it. I need to know. Dont look at me like that; I cant explain it any further. I just need to know.
You love him, admit that you do. Just remember; he cares nothing for you.
I guess .I guess I do love him but that is also why I need to know. Just one night, just one night. Ill return to you but I need to know. I need to know.
Then go to him if you must but remember my words and hear my warning; he will break your heart, you know he will. Dont come looking here for comfort when he does; remember I did warn you.
I know ..I know. Ill tend to the wounds he gives me alone because I do know he cares nothing for me but he wants me just the same.
He wants your body; not your soul. Dont give him what he refuses to take; don't give him your heart and your soul.
I cant take back what is already given.
Hell destroy you; hell burn your soul and step on your heart. Youll bleed and youll hurt. Hear my warning and my words.
I hear but my heart wont listen. I have to know. Just give me one night of make belief; just one night.
Then go and get your heart broken, see if I care.
I guess you dont. And dont worry; I will return to you.
I know and .just dont kid yourself, okay? He will leave and he will leave you behind with your bleeding heart in your hands and youll hurt for a very long time.
I know I will but I still have to go.
Then go .I just never thought it was true what they say ..its only better to have loved and lost than not to have loved at all if the loss part doesnt kill you.
Moonshine, a flowery garden, a mild wind, a warm summer night. Two figures meet, one hungers for a love which will never be given to him and the other simply hungers for release.
One reach out, they embrace. He draws a bit back as the others fingers run over his arm.
"I'm not going to hurt you," the other promises.
A sad smile, unnoticed tears in his eyes, an understanding he wish he didnt have.
"Yes, you will," he states softly, knowing it to be true yet still needing this because isnt one moment of Heaven better than an eternity of darkness? Or will the Hell that follows tomorrow overshadow the joy of tonight?
"I promise I'll be worth it," is all the other offers; thats all hell give.
And in a window up in the mansion a young woman briefly looks down on the two men and her heart aches. Hell hurt her love, she knows he will yet she cant stop it and she isnt sure if she should try. She only hopes shell be able to pull her lover up from the Hell his leaving in the morning will bring him.
Some things just arent worth the agony, Scott, Jean mumbles sadly as she turns away from the window and climbs into the cold and empty bed. Shell hold him tomorrow, hold him as his heart breaks and he feels like hes alone, abandoned and in Hell. Shell hold him close and shell know hell pretend for just a moment that she is another; the one hes with right now.
Hes not worth it, dear Scott, she mumbles softly and her eyes clouds with tears for him. Logan will be gone tomorrow and youll see; he wasnt worth it.