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Fic: "Broken Mind, Healing Hands" PG-13 (1/1) [Logan/Scott, Jean/Ororo, Xavi er/Erik]

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  • Nadja Lee
    Broken Mind, Healing Hands By Nadja Lee 22/01/01 English is not my native language. Please forgive me my mistakes. Disclaimer: “X-men” and all the
    Message 1 of 1 , Jul 23, 2002
      Broken Mind, Healing Hands

      By Nadja Lee 22/01/01

      English is not my native language. Please forgive me my mistakes.

      Disclaimer: “X-men” and all the characters here belong to Marvel , 20 Century Fox and I intend no infringement, this is a piece of amateur fan fiction, and I make no money of it.

      Only the original idea contained within this work is the property of the author. Please do not copy this story to any website or archive without permission of the author.

      Timeline: Set after the movie.

      Universe: Set in the movie universe. Only the movie NOT the book that goes with it!

      Pairing: Scott/Logan, slight Jean/Ororo and Xavier/Eric

      Summary: Logan finds Scott after his mind has been broken….

      Archiving: Want, ASK, take, have.

      Feedback: Yes, please. My e-mail address is nadjalee2000@...

      Rating: PG-13

      Dedicated to: Jemisard

      Special thanks to my beloved friend Jemi. Without you I’ll never have written more Scott/Logan.

      This story is a tribute to Jemisard’s series ‘Lost Past/Highlands’ which you can read on my webpage “X-men Hero: Cyclops”
      http://www.dreamwater.org/scottsummers/index.html
      in the Scott/Logan section. It was written out of love for that series and its author and with permission to do so. This story was originally written for Jemisard’s eyes only but she and Estelle convinced me to try and let it loose.

      Thanks to Estelle for the Beta and kind encouragement. Thanks to Angel-love for the medical knowledge *G*

      *mmmm * is telepathically thoughts spoken in the mind. “ mmmmm ” is spoken out loud.

      Part 1:

      Logan sat in a bar in Canada and watched the TV placed behind the counter. He had gone to the military compound that Xavier had showed him. There hadn’t been much left and what had been there hadn’t told him much he hadn't already known. There had been something left of a hospital section where Logan was fairly sure his skeleton had been made. The only new thing he had found was that he hadn’t been the only one who had been a prisoner there. He had found a file with a lot of numbers listed, their gender listed next to their number.

      He wasn’t sure where to go from here. Should he disappear like before? Just stay away from everyone who knew him? Maybe even return to Europe? Where had that thought even come from? Return to Europe? He hadn’t been to Europe…had he? He concentrated and blurry images of fighting, gunshots and dead bodies came to him. He couldn’t hold the image and let it slip. Maybe he should return to New York? To the school? To Rogue? To…….Scott? No, he couldn’t. Scott had been the reason he left. He had wanted him from the moment he first saw him but he didn’t want to destroy the relationship he had with Jean nor force him to choose between them. And of course there was that little detail that to his knowledge Scott hated his guts which really wasn’t unexpected. He had done his best to play the part of a jackass. He hadn’t wanted to but if he were to move on he had to make sure that the image of Scott…….any good images of him stayed away. He hadn’t quite succeeded. He remembered Scott’s brilliant smile as he had destroyed the metal detector in the Statue and his uncovered face still haunted his dreams as he had seen him in the Statue. He had seemed so young, so innocent……so beautiful. Trying to force Scott’s image out of his mind, he turned his attention to the TV and saw the local news running.

      “ The young mutant male who was discovered near a roadside six days ago have now been released from the hospital and into the care of the mental institute. The man has not yet been able to say who he is and the police seeks information about him. Have no family come forth by the end of this week the mental institute will turn the man over the to government mutant research centre. Here is a picture of the mutant taken three days after he was found….”

      Logan looked at the picture and almost dropped his glass of beer. It was of a young man, his eyes taped shut, a hospital gown over a bruised and ragged body and brown messy hair. The man sat curled up in a corner and a hand under his chin forced him to look up and into the camera. He looked scared and frightened. His arms and legs were decorated with a mass of bruises and cuts, colouring pink and blue. The man’s face was swollen from a beating and his left eye was swollen shut and a blue ring lay around it. But even in this state…….even looking like this there was no mistaking who it was…………….

      “ Scott!”

      Part 2:

      “ I want to see the man you brought in here. NOW!” Logan demanded of the nurse sitting behind the counter at the mental hospital.

      “ You know the mutant? Are you family?” the woman asked and Logan growled in frustration. Scott was in danger, in pain and she was being difficult!

      “ Yes. Now, tell me where the fuck he is,” Logan demanded and leaned over the counter. Something in his eyes made the woman draw back.

      “Okay….Down the hall, room 4,” the woman finally gave in.

      Logan quickly left and found the door. It was locked but the key was on this side so he opened it and went in.

      “ Slim? It is me, Logan,” he said in a calming tone as he entered the dark room. The room held a bed and two chairs only the chairs laid broken on the floor and the mattress had been torn to pieces. His eyes adjusted to the darkness and he saw a crumbled form sitting in a corner. As he neared Scott lifted his head towards the sound. The tape was still over his eyes but his face and body looked better, many of the bruises having healed.

      “ Man, what have they done to you?” Logan asked softly as he saw the fear as craved in stone on the other man’s face. Whoever had done this would pay. He didn’t care if it took an eternity; he would find them and make them realise that they had never known pain before they met him.

      “ Grrrrrrrrrrr,” Scott yelled angrily like a frightened animal and jumped on Logan, his hands beating at him and his teeth searching for his aorta carotis communis in his throat.

      “ Scott!” Logan yelled and tried to push him away without hurting him. Suddenly footsteps were heard and an electric stick was placed onto Scott’s back, making him unconscious, his face falling from its angry and pained features to his normal self again.

      “ You alright?” a doctor asked and reached a hand down to help him up. Logan ignored his hand and got up.

      “ I was doing just fine before your goons came,” Logan said furiously and without further ado, hit the orderly who had put Scott into unconsciousness, in the face, slamming him to the floor and into dream land.

      “ What? Who do you think you are?!” the doctor asked angrily as the now unconscious orderly was carried away by more men in white coats. Logan hated the sight of men in white coats. It brought back memories of the experiments made on him.

      “ I think I’m the man who could kill you right now if I wanted to, bub,” Logan growled dangerously and the doctor took an involuntary step back.

      “ What…what do you want?” he asked and tried to get his voice under control.

      “ Him,” he pointed to Scott’s crumbled form on the floor and as he saw there was immediate danger to Scott or himself he went to him and gently stroked his hair before taking him up in his arms and turning back to the doctor.

      “ But...but….you can’t do that. Not unless you are family,” the doctor protested.

      “ I AM family,” Logan growled and pressed Scott’s bruised body close to him.

      “ Okayyyyyyy,” the doctor finally said as the dangerous look in Logan’s eyes made him back down. Logan nodded in satisfaction and went past him.

      “ He will be a handful. Are you sure you know how to take care of him?” a young female nurse asked as he went towards the door.

      “ What do you mean?” Logan demanded to know, his patience at an end. All he wanted was to get Scott as far away from this place as possible. Find somewhere safe and protect him. With his life if necessary.

      “ He was found naked by the roadside a few days ago. He had been tortured and possibly raped. His mind seem destroyed and he has lost the ability to speak. The police suspect a local anti-mutant group called ‘Friends Of Humanity‘ who have probably held him for weeks before they left him for dead,” she explained and sympathy was in her eyes as she reached out a hand to stroke Scott’s brown hair but Logan jerked Scott away from her.

      “ Mine!” he growled warningly and she took her hand back.

      “ Look, I just wanted you to know what you are getting into. He may not recognize you or anyone else. Ever,” she warned and left as a light went on from one of the rooms to indicate her assistance were needed. Logan looked at the unconscious man in his arms and tightened his grip on him. He’ll make sure whoever had done that to HIS Scott paid for their crimes and he’ll make sure Scott was safe. He’ll bring him back. Somehow.

      Part 3:

      “ So, how do you feel?” Logan asked in a calming tone as he the next day entered Scott’s room in the small house Logan had in Canada. He didn’t even remember buying it but apparently he had. Or rather it had been a gift from someone named Silver Fox. The name said something to him, it was somehow connected to the experiment on him but he couldn’t quite place it.

      Logan had brought Scott to the house last night while the man had still been unconscious. He had bathed and clothed him which hadn’t been a easy task as his beauty kept distracting him while the marks on his body made anger come to the surface and threatened to rule out all sensible thoughts. He had placed Scott in the guestroom just next to his own so he was always nearby. He had been sorely tempted to put Scott in his own bed but he remembered that the nurse had said that he might have been raped as well and Logan didn’t want Scott’s confused and pain clouded mind to get the wrong idea and draw back from him.

      Scott jumped from the bed to the floor as soon as he heard him and crumbled into the corner, trying to disappear into the wall. Logan looked sadly at him. It pained him beyond words that the proud leader had been broken so that even his mind and memories were gone.

      “ I mean you no harm. I’m your friend, Logan,” he tried again and reached for him but Scott tried to back away but as he felt he was trapped he slashed out after Logan, trying to bite his finger as would an animal. Logan quickly withdrew his hand. It would be easier if he talked but last night Logan had examined Scott’s vocal chord and larynx and his larynx seemed crushed. He might be able to utter a few words but they’ll be pained and hoarse. He now wished he had some of Scott’s glasses for him. He’ll have to call the professor for them and also say that Scott was with him. He briefly wondered if the X-men searched for their leader. Now that he thought about it he couldn’t understand what Scott had been doing in Canada in the first place.

      “ Scott, do you even remember me?” Logan tried again but Scott still just tried to crawl further into the back wall, away from him. Logan sighed pained. Maybe the nurse had been right. He didn’t know what to do.

      “ I´ll put some food and water here on the table. The table is next to your bed to the right,” Logan said and hurried out of the room, closing the door behind him. It was way too hard. It pained him so much to see Scott in such agony and be unable to help. He heard noise from Scott’s room and was sure that he was destroying the chairs as he had in the hospital. The bed would probably go next.

      Logan went to the phone and dialled the number to the school.

      “ Xavier’s school, Jean Grey speaking,” a voice said and Logan wanted to slam the phone on again. She had been between Scott and him. Her and only her. He had only flirted with her to get her away from Scott but that…. bitch had been unable to choose.

      “ It’s Logan,” he growled as he had to admit that the situation was more urgent than the jealousy he felt towards the person who was in Scott’s heart and bed. A part of his mind said that maybe if Scott saw her he’ll wake up but he just wouldn’t...couldn’t allow that. Not yet. He would get Scott back. Him and no one else.

      “ Hey Logan. How are you? Rogue misses you,” Jean’s pleasant voice came over the phone and Logan wanted to scream. Wasn’t she worried for Scott at all? Didn’t she care?

      “ Tell the kid I love her and will be back. Someday,” Logan said. He missed Rogue too. She was like a daughter to him.

      “ Jeannie, I want to speak with the professor. Now,” Logan demanded as more noise came from Scott’s room.

      “ He is not home. Why do you want to speak with him?” Jean sounded puzzled.

      “ Who is it, Jean?” Logan heard Ororo ask.

      “ Just Logan. Go back to sleep,” Jean said lovely and Logan heard a kiss. What was going on here? Okay, so he had forgotten that it was only five in the morning in New York but still……this was way too weird.

      “ Where is Wheels? I need to talk to him about Scott,” Logan asked and tried to keep his temper in check. That two-timing bitch! She was cheating on Scott. How could she?!

      “ Charles is at Eric’s. You probably heard that he escaped from prison but no one could remember how and when? Well, Charles couldn’t help it. He cares too deeply,” Jean said and Logan threw that information out of his mind as unimportant.

      “ Then give me Eric’s number.”

      Though he was still angry that Magneto had tried to kill Rogue, the closest to a daughter he’ll ever get, he had more important things on his mind than Magneto’s love life and screwed up brain.

      “ Alright,” the sound of some searching in papers. “ Ororo, do you know where………?”

      “ Here,” Ororo’s voice came and a kiss sounded again.

      “ Thanks, “ Jean said softly. “ Well, here it is,” Jean turned back to Logan and her voice was still kind but without the loving edge it had held before. She gave him Eric’s number and Logan wrote it down.

      “ How is Scott? He found you I take it?” Jean asked with a hint of amusement.

      “ What? Was he looking for me?” Logan asked shocked.

      “ Well, yes. Didn’t he tell you? He and I broke up some weeks after you left and Scott explained that he couldn’t allow you to walk away like that. He wanted you and needed you to know that so he left over a month ago to find you. When his phone calls stopped some days later we assumed he had found you and that you were…….busy,” she explained and sounded confused.

      “ Oh, I did find him but…….” He was about to say more when a loud noise came from Scott’s room. He wanted to tell about Scott’s condition but feared he’ll be taken from him if he did. After all both Jean and the professor had medical degrees. They would be obvious choices to help Scott and not him.

      “ Well, good,” Jean said as his silence lasted.

      “ Yeah. Well, say halloo to ’Ro and Marie from me,” Logan said and hung up. He called Eric.

      “ Yeah? Eric Lensherr speaking,” Magneto’s deep voice said and sounded very annoyed at being woken so early which he also voiced. “ Do you know what time it is?”

      “ Yeah, halloo to you too,” Logan growled. “ I need to speak to Wheels.”

      “ You never had any manners! I will NOT have him addressed that way. I’ll………,” Eric began and Logan could hear him warming up to a full blown speech here.

      “ Eric? Who is it?” Charles voice asked from somewhere.

      “ That ill-mannered Logan fellow,” Eric answered annoyed but his voice held a kind and loving tone Logan didn’t know he was capable of.

      “ Let me talk with him,” Charles asked gently and the phone changed hands. “ Yes, Logan?”

      “ Finally! I need your help with Slim,” Logan began.

      “ You have found him? Is he alright? I lost my telepathic contact with him some weeks ago. I thought he had severed our link and wanted some privacy. I understand that of course but I would like him to call once in a while to let me know he is alright,” Charles said worried.

      “ Tell that boy to call his father once in a while or he’ll answer to me,” Eric grunted in the background.

      “ If it was that simple…,” Logan said sadly.

      “ What? What is wrong? Has something happened to Scott? Tell me,” Charles demanded to know. Logan heard faint cries of suffering from Scott’s room and thought about it. If he told him Charles would take Scott with him, away from him.

      “ All is well, except Scott lost his glasses. Can you send a new pair to us?” Logan quickly said. He would NOT lose Scott to anyone. And he would make it work. He’ll heal Scott. Somehow. He would.

      “Okay. They can be there by Friday. Are you sure Scott is alright? He have just severed our connection because he wants privacy, right? He is not hurt, is he?” Charles asked again, worry clear in his voice.

      “ Everything is fine,” or it will be, Logan added silently and hung up. He went to Scott’s room. Everything would be fine. He’ll make it work. He’ll make everything alright…

      Part 4:

      “ Scott, your glasses came today,” Logan said happily as he entered Scott’s room. The chairs were broken and the mattress were torn to pieces but all else was in one piece. Scott turned his head to the sound of his voice. They had been at Logan’s house for five days and Scott was getting better. A little anyway. He didn’t crumble in the corner of the room when ever he entered as he had the first few days and he seemed to be curious about who he was and what he did. There was still no sign that he remembered anything nor that he had any thoughts beyond the most primitive. So far Logan had been able to guess Scott’s next move from the behaviour of an abused animal. But even though there was no sign of it, Logan wouldn’t give up hope that deep within Scott Summers still lived and he would bring him back. He hoped that the glasses would help him.

      “ Scott, come to me. I won’t hurt you,” Logan said softly and sat on the floor a little away from Scott. Curious Scott slowly came nearer the sound of his voice until he sat a few feet away from Logan.

      “ I’ll have to take off the tape now. Close your eyes,” Logan asked and reached over to remove the tape. He knew that if Scott didn’t close his eyes, if he hadn’t understood, he’ll blast him as he sat across from him. But Logan trusted Scott never to hurt him even in this state. Trusted him to understand.

      “ There,” Logan mumbled as he as gently as possible took off the tape. Even though he had trusted Scott with his life he did draw a relieved breath as he saw Scott’s tightly closed eyelids. He was stunned for a moment over how beautiful he was, the long lashes laying fine against his cheeks. Logan took forth the glasses and placed them on Scott’s head and smiled as Scott didn’t draw back from his touch.

      “ Now, open your eyes,” Logan said as he drew back. Logan saw the red behind the glasses as Scott opened his eyes and looked at him through them. Scott reached out a hesitant hand and touched Logan’s cheek ever so softly.

      “L………Logan?” his voice was low, hoarse and unsure.

      “ Yes. Yes, Scott. It is me,” Logan said and tears almost came to his eyes. “ Do you remember me?”

      “ L…Lo……..Logan,” Scott whispered again and stroked his cheek. Then he removed his hand and smiled at him before running out the room and outside. Logan touched his cheek where Scott’s warm hand had touched him. He smiled too. They had come a long way with much longer to go but they were getting there.

      Part 5:

      “ A…..dog,” Scott finally said as Logan pointed to a picture in a book.

      “ Very good. And now this one?” Logan asked and pointed to a picture of a woman in a dress in the children’s picture book. After Scott had gotten his glasses Logan had quickly realised that even through Scott remembered his name he remembered little else. Scott’s mind seemed like a clean slate except from Logan‘s name which he often said.

      When Logan had asked if he remembered his own name Scott had just smiled at him and whispered “Logan” in the hoarse voice he had come to love and look forth to so much. Logan wasn’t sure Scott had understood the question at all. Unsure of what to do, Logan had gone to the library and rented a lot of psychology books on abused children. Then he had started to try to piece Scott’s mind together. Since he knew very little of Scott’s past he had begun to teach him things; reading, writing and mathematics. After two months Scott had reached high school level in mathematics and physics but still struggled with reading and writing. He had called the professor and tried to casually slip the question of mathematics, physics and Scott into a conversation which wasn’t easy and had learned that one of Scott’s mutations was to be incredible good in these two subjects. While he had the professor at hand he had said that he and Scott took some time off and didn’t want to be contacted as they were out of the country. In fact Logan just didn’t want Charles to know. Not just yet, anyway. He still hoped that in time Scott would remember more and hopefully remember Charles who cared so much for Scott.

      “ W….wo…….lady,” Scott then settled with as the other word wouldn’t come. They sat on the floor by the fireplace, Scott curled up close to him. It was late and Scott lay with his head on Logan’s leg, looking at the book in Logan’s lap as he sat cross-legged on the floor.

      “ And this?” Logan pointed to a new picture and absently stroked Scott over the hair. Since he had gotten his glasses he had trusted Logan with a completion that even surprised Logan himself even though he knew that even animals could bind very close bonds to the people who looked after them. Logan wasn’t sure if Scott had gotten so much of his humanity, of his mind back that his actions could be taken as a sign of love.

      “ Slim…..tired,” Scott whispered and soon Logan realised that he had fallen asleep. Logan smiled to him. In sleep he looked so very young. Scott never said his own name out loud and if he needed to explain something about himself he would use Logan’s nickname for him “Slim” even though Logan had tried to explain to him that it wasn’t his real name. Logan drew back and stood up. Then he bent down and as gently as possible lifted Scott up and into his arms. Even in sleep he craved his nearness, as he leaned against Logan’s chest.

      “ L…Logan…..safe,” Scott mumbled and Logan smiled. He had often said that and Logan knew that it meant that Scott felt safe with him, something Logan was very proud and happy about. Slowly as not to wake him, Logan carried his precious burden into the guestroom and put him on the bed. He lay him under the covers and following an impulse he bent down and kissed him on the cheek before leaving the room and closing the door.

      Part 6:

      “ L…..Logan. Dinner,” Scott voiced with difficulty and Logan joined him in the kitchen. It looked good, some meat recipe from a book. In fact it was a perfect match to the picture in it. As soon as Scott had gotten the hang of it some five months after Logan had brought him to his house, he had started reading and reading and reading. He craved so many books that Logan had had to buy more. He read everything from history and science to cooking. He spoke very little as it pained him and kept it to small words. Logan had tried to talk with him about what happened but Scott had let him understand that he couldn’t remember anything about the incident. Logan had tried to mention earlier events and people; showing him pictures. Save Charles and very vaguely Ororo and Jean he didn’t recognise anything. He didn’t even remember being in the hospital. From the psychology books he had read Logan was sure Scott was suppressing the terrible memories of his torture and all what connected to it as a way to protect himself and Logan doubted it would bring anything but pain for him to remember.

      Scott began putting the food on the table and Logan helped him. They seated themselves by the table.

      “ Hope….like,” Scott said with a smile as Logan put food up on Scott’s plate and then his own.

      “ I know I’ll love it,” Logan said gently as they began eating.

      “ I…..Ch…..go…,” Scott began but gave it up. He held up his hands and signed to Logan instead. After three months Logan had realised that Scott would have great difficulty with voicing his needs and wishes and had searched for another way to communicate. He had brought a book on sign language and had slowly learned the new language with Scott. They had now lived together for a year and while Charles would phone them often Logan hadn’t let Scott do more than say halloo to him and that was only because Charles had insisted on hearing Scott’s voice as their link still wasn’t back. They were now both pretty good at signing and Scott’s hands moved quickly up and down as he explained and Logan watched intensely.

      “ You want to go see Charles?” Logan asked as Scott stopped. He nodded eagerly.

      “ Alright, I guess. He has been out of the country with Eric for a mutant conference but they should both be back this week. We can leave tomorrow if you like,” Logan suggested.

      “ Like,” Scott said with a smile and Logan smiled back. He had never wished to keep Charles and Scott apart, he just wanted to be with Scott and he didn’t want to hurt Charles either as he knew it would to see Scott in pain. But he was better now. Much better. His knowledge was still growing but had reached a level Logan suspected he had had before the incident and his language skills were better. However his memory was still a problem. He didn’t hide the fact that he cared deeply for Logan and he’ll often take his hand or kiss him on the cheek but it wasn’t the kind of love Logan wanted. Not yet, anyway. But then maybe if he remembered all he would also remember that he loved him? Truly loved him. A part of him was ready to let Scott remember everything, also his torture , if it meant he’ll remember his love for him but his heart won out. Scott didn’t deserve that pain and never had. If it could stay out of his mind then he had no right to be so selfish. Yet he still wished and dreamed that one day…maybe, he’ll remember the love that Jean had told him he bore for him.

      Part 7:

      “Ring, ring.”

      “ I’ll get it,” Logan and Scott heard a voice say as they had parked Scott’s motorcycle outside and for the first time Scott had been driving as Logan had taught it all to him, again, much to Scott’s delight who found he loved the feel of flying through the streets with Logan’s secure arms around his waist.

      “ Yes?” Eric said as he opened the door. Then he saw who it was. “ They are here,” he yelled over his shoulder and gestured for them to step inside. They did so and after taking their coats off they all went to the kitchen.

      “ Charles, see who are here,” Eric said and went to the man in the wheelchair and gave his hand a gentle squeeze. Charles turned from the something he had been cooking and looked at Logan and Scott. Scott had taken Logan’s hand in his and Logan stood a little in front of him as if ready to protect him should it be necessary.

      “ Scott,” Charles said happily and Scott lit up in a smile.

      “ F…..fat…father,” Scott got out and went to him. He kneeled by the chair and lay his head in Charles’ lap.

      “ My dear child,” Charles mumbled and gently stroked his head. Logan tried to contain his jealousy while shooting daggers with his eyes at Charles.

      “ Act on it and I kill you,” Eric promised as he put a wineglass in Logan’s hand.

      “ You can try,” Logan said but gave it up as he saw Charles shake his head at him.

      “ What happened, Scott?” Charles asked kindly but with worry and concern in his voice. Scott lifted his head and looked at him.

      “ I…..we……L….Logan….,” Scott began but was forced to give it up as tears of pain sprung to his eyes. Instead he signed what he meant, what had happened and how Logan had looked after him.

      “ Scott, please. I don’t understand you. May I see what happened in your mind? Through the link we share?” Charles said gently. Scott nodded and Charles brought his hands to Scott’s temples, touching them softly. As soon as they connected both men seemed to freeze, their bodies frozen in position and their eyes, at least the professor’s, unblinking.

      “ Charles!” Eric yelled concerned and went to him.

      “ Scott,” Logan said worried and went to them as well. Eric tried to pull Charles carefully away from Scott to break the link but was thrown back as he tried to remove Charles’ hands.

      “ What the…?” Eric mumbled as he landed on the floor. Logan also tried to separate them and landed next to Eric on the floor.

      “ What the fuck is happening here?” Logan growled concerned as both men got up and went to stand and look at Charles and Scott but didn’t touch them.

      “ Charles must be in Scott’s mind,” Eric thought out loud before turning to Logan. “ This is very important; how was Scott’s mind? Was it well ordered?” Concern was in his voice and Logan didn’t like it. Pain to Eric meant pain to Charles and that was pain to Scott which ultimately pained him. What a mess.

      “ Well….I’m not sure. He had forgotten everything but a few faces and I….you know, taught him again,” Logan explained and looked at Scott with concern.

      “ Had he truly forgotten….or did he only want to?” Eric asked softly.

      “ What the Hell does it matter?” Logan demanded to know as he took Scott’s free hand. Nothing happened but he wasn’t thrown away either.

      “ It matters because Charles will be able to see everything in Scott’s mind as long as it is there, no matter how deeply buried. He could get lost inside a confused and panicked mind,” Eric went to Charles and lay a hand on his shoulder, looking concerned at him. If only he knew what to do….he felt so helpless and he hated feeling helpless.

      “ Maybe we…..,” Logan began but stopped as a blinding light hit him and he lost all sense of reality.

      “ Where…where am I?” Logan asked as he looked around a big white room with nothing else in it. Suddenly Eric appeared.

      “ Inside someone’s head. What is going on here?” Eric asked and looked at Logan who stood next to him.

      “ Correct. We are inside my mind. I’m sorry but I had to do this, Eric, I need you,” Charles said as he suddenly appeared and went to Eric.

      “ You….you can walk,” Eric said joyfully and hugged him close.

      “ In a way. This is only the mental image of myself,” Charles said kindly and stroked his cheek. Then he turned to Logan.
      “ Scott’s mind is very abused. I can’t get out of it before it has order again. But there is a problem in that. Right now his mind is one confused mess and I can’t break the link like this. But if I let him remember; remove the safety lock his mind has put on all memories to protect himself; he’ll also remember what happened those weeks and if he do that he’ll return to the animal state in which you found him,” Charles sounded very sad and Eric lay a comforting hand on his shoulder.

      “ So, what do we do?” Logan asked, eager to help Scott. He’ll do anything. Anything at all.

      “ I may be able to undo the lock on all memories previous to his capture and still keep a lock on the others. However to be able to do that I need a mind other than my own to anchor it to,” Charles explained.

      “ I’ll do it,” Logan said immediately, even if he wasn’t quite sure WHAT he was volunteering to do. Charles smiled.

      “ That was what I thought but you should know what if I anchor his mind in yours it will have to be both ways; I’ll have to anchor your mind in his as well and that means that you’ll have a permanent link,” Xavier continued and waved for Logan to come closer to him and Eric.

      “ What does this permanent link do?” Logan asked as he went to him and Eric.

      “ It will be a bond, kind of like what I share with Scott and Eric,” Charles said and his hand found Eric’s.

      “ Really?” Logan asked doubtfully as he took Charles’ outstretched hand.

      “ In a way. Charles made a link between his and my mind some years ago. This bond allows us to speak inside each others heads and get a sense of what each other is feeling. It is also this ability which makes me aware of where Charles is even when I’m not with him and if he is in pain I’ll fell it like I did when Mystique had poisoned him,” Eric’s eyes narrowed. He still hadn’t forgiven her for that. She was supposed to stun him, never harm him in any way.

      “ We’ll be able to do that? Even if neither of us have telepathic abilities?” Logan asked and joy was in his voice. That would be great. Then he’ll never need to worry about Scott again. A part of him would always be with him and he would always be able to know if he was hurt so something like what happened in Canada could never happen again.

      “ Yes. Your link with him will not be nearly as strong as mine but then in return it can’t be turned off as mine with him can and like I’m unable to do with Eric and my own bond,” Charles further explained and held on to Logan’s hand on his left side and Eric’s on his right.

      “ So, what precisely will happen now?” Logan asked as Charles was about to close his eyes and concentrate. Would this hurt Scott in any way?

      “ Scott will not be hurt. You’ll both see all what the others mind holds of memories and feelings before you’ll break free. I’ll make the link between you and then with Eric as my anchor, I’ll be able to pull out,” Charles explained and looked at the two men.

      “ Ready,” Eric said and Logan nodded.

      “ Ready,” he said and his body fell through the air until he reached a hallway and he walked through it. On the walls played images. The first was of a child being born, then of a man’s face leaning over him, a woman’s lullaby. As he walked the child grew and years passed as he saw family birthdays cease when the child was five years old. He felt the pain and loneliness as his family died and he went to a orphanage. He felt the agony in his eyes and skull as his powers manifested themselves as beams of red energy from his eyes. He felt his joy as finding Charles and his love for the man. Finally he felt and saw his love and passion for the stranger, for a man, tall and dark. For…Logan. He felt surrounded by a beam of pure love and light and he felt joy beyond words. Then suddenly he was torn away and as he looked around he was back in Eric and Charles’ kitchen, Eric holding Charles hand, Charles smiling at him from his wheelchair and Scott stood beside him, smiling at him. He felt…alone, abandoned after the light and warmth had left.

      * Don’t feel that way. I´ll always be with you,* a kind voice, a welcomed and loved voice said and the light returned and stayed even as the voice faded away.

      * You…can hear my thoughts?* Logan asked as he turned to Scott and forgot all about Eric and Charles in the beauty of Scott’s love in his mind.

      * I can hear them as you can hear mine. You can feel my love as I can feel yours, Logan* Scott sent and smiled at him. Logan went to him but remembering what he had been through he stopped before him and just opened his arms in invitation. Without hesitation Scott went into his embrace and his lips found Logan’s. Joyfully Logan deepened the kiss until they drew apart. He looked happy but confused at this sudden change.

      * Logan, he can’t remember. I told you so. He only remembers everything up to wanting to find you again,* Charles spoke in his mind.

      * What of his speaking troubles?* Logan asked as he held Scott close.

      * He thinks he was in a car accident a week before he left to find you. His skills of the sign language stayed with him however as did all the basis knowledge you gave him. Just don’t discuss with him from where he knows this. It is best that way. The only way to save his mind* Charles explained and he and Eric had discreetly turned towards the cooking and Eric was making the table in the dinning room, to give Scott and Logan some privacy.

      * Logan, I wanted to tell you something. When you left I…..what I mean is….* Scott began to send but stopped as he didn’t know what to say. How to say it.

      “ I love you too, Slim,” Logan said out loud and stroked his cheek and Scott smiled.

      * Wow. I thought it would take me forever to get you to say those words*

      * It did. It took a year,* Logan sent and Scott looked puzzled at him.

      “ Never mind,” Logan said with a smile and drew him back into a kiss.

      “ Could you two postpone that for a while? I would like to eat soon,” Eric complained and Scott and Logan drew apart.

      “ So, what are we having?” Logan asked as they sat by the table.

      “One of Charles favourite disks; tenderloin and new potatoes,” Eric said with a smile as he seated himself next to Charles and took his hand in his own.

      “ Sounds good,” Logan said and Scott nodded.

      “ G…good,” he said and as they began to eat Scott’s hand found and held on to Logan’s hand, never letting go ever again.

      The End
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