Darker Destiny: When All Light Dies
By Nadja Lee 14/05/02
English is not my native language. Please forgive me my mistakes.
Disclaimer: X-men and all the characters here belong to Marvel, 20 Century Fox and I intend no infringement, this is a piece of amateur fan fiction, and I make no money of it.
Only the original idea contained within this work is the property of the author. Please do not copy this story to any website or archive without permission of the author.
Timeline: Set in the movie universe/an AU. Before the movie
Universe: Set in the movie universe; NOT the book which goes with it.
Summary: A young man thinks and feels
Archiving: Want, ASK, take, have.
Feedback: Yes, please. My e-mail address is nadjalee2000@...
Warning: May contain disturbing elements. This is a VERY dark tale! You have been warned.
Sequel/series: Part of the Darker Destiny series.
Thanks to Estelle for the Beta
Have you ever wondered what it is like to feel too much
.. care too much?
Why? Why is this happening? Why are they doing this? I wish someone would explain it to me because Im lost.
How can they pretend nothing is wrong? How can they just walk by and not care? How do they do that?
I wish I could do that. I wish I didnt care. But I do. Every time I turn on the TV I see death, pain and suffering. Every book I pick up is filled with blood and agony and every time I walk down the street I feel others despair and loneliness as strongly as if they had written a sign.
How can they just walk by and not care? How do they do that? My thoughts are in turmoil and Im fading fast. I can find no light and no hope. I see no love and no compassion in peoples eyes.
On the contrary; from an early age I see hate and destruction. Being able to beat someone up is good, seeing a movie where someone gets killed is great and reading a book about a mass murderer is cool. Things are turned upside down and I dont know what to do or whom to turn to. I feel like Im about to explode, I cant hold it all inside.
I feel like screaming yet I remain silent, I feel like leaving yet I stay. The pain in my heart grows as the light fades with years. I had hoped that as I grew older I could find faith or hope but I find none. Everyday theres a new murder, a new war and another victim.
I read the papers and the articles about the rising gas prices are splattered all over the front page while a notice of more than 300 civilians brutally slathered in Somalia ends up as a footnote somewhere. Who cares 100th of miles away? Well, I do. I wish I didnt because this agony inside my soul is tearing me to pieces.
I swear I hear them; whispering, moaning, calling desperately for help. I hear them when Im alone in the darkness and theres no one else. And I cant help. I feel so frustrated and alone. Tears run down my cheeks as I fight to keep that faint light inside me alive.
I need someone to light my spirits; someone to give me hope. I search but find none. I can no longer do this. Its too much; too much. Theyre killing it; theyre killing me.
I stare in fascination at the razor blade in my hand, hypnotized by its glimmering sharp edge. Ive lived long enough to know that things only get worse; why should I stay to find out how much more hurt they can bring on themselves
and me? They may not care or see but I feel it all inside; Im in agony and they dont care
no one ever does. I let a soft song play, tears fall from my eyes, the room is otherwise silent; everyone is asleep
.Im alone. So lost and alone.
I bring the sharp edge down against my wrist.