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Poem: And All that Could Have Been

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  • Autumn Biggins
    Title: And All that Could Have Been Author: Autumn E-mail: dyslexic_crisco_penguin_fiend@hotmail.com Catagorey: Heavy angst, have a piece of foof around in
    Message 1 of 1 , May 24, 2002
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      Title: And All that Could Have Been

      Author: Autumn

      E-mail: dyslexic_crisco_penguin_fiend@...

      Catagorey: Heavy angst, have a piece of foof around in a convenient
      location.

      Author's notes: The title comes from a wonderful live Nine Inch
      Nails album.
      ____________________________________________

      The fragments of life slither away
      Crumpled up, turned to dust
      and left beyond decay

      Each piece a constant reminder
      of what might have been
      contrasted aginst the reality

      of it all

      Shiney, happy people
      simply do not exist
      in this twisted world of ours

      Delusuons of grandur and excess
      have no place here
      inside the grey

      You were there while
      I was here
      simple as that, case closed

      The telephone is a marvel
      a useful invention indeed
      bearing all nees

      even the bad

      Her departure sealed
      with fiberoptics and cable
      1,000 miles away

      Not even a kiss
      to her lover, her fiance
      her friends or family

      The sting of it all
      centred around anger
      clouded by 'should have knowns'

      His gruffness mistaken
      for kindness hidden
      beneath layers of flanel

      never again

      A healthy dose
      of the way things are
      and what we cannot change

      We turn to dreams
      to deny what is
      and continue the fantasy

      To live in our heads
      the world watching
      passing by, without a care

      Reason banished
      replaced by insanity
      and other just things

      Replacement killers
      slaughter, and carnage
      tangeld in the illusion of love

      which doesn't exist

      Like shiney, happy poeple
      they all fade eventually
      the tatters of fantsy broken

      Easier to believe
      in what you want
      versus what you need

      Everybody needs
      another somebody
      or so it says

      In books, movies
      Cosmo, television
      a completment to our own self

      A continuaiton
      if you will
      but you won't and don't

      Not even to try
      just a little bit
      access denied, game over

      She doesn't love
      you
      and you don't even care

      She makes you
      I don't know
      in the dead of the night

      Dead nights, and days
      taken away
      by the magic of perception

      it's real and not

      It could be differnt
      in some ways
      had a chance been taken

      Happiness and health
      in this unperfect world
      with the delusioned people

      Lust won out
      as usual
      why does it fail to surprise

      It could have been
      should have been
      but plans fall apart

      lives and stories end

      Too late for that
      the hour has passed
      and alone I shall die

      We're never truly alone
      in here
      but it feels like we are always

      I can't let go
      surrender the fantasy
      it's larger than me

      It could have changed
      or just slightly rearange
      change the key, remix it somehow

      In the end
      we are not us
      and never will have been

      though in my head

      Dreaming, hallucination
      stems from the same place
      our deepest, darkest wishes

      I have but one
      untold by large
      simple and secret, spilled

      You
      and me
      And all that could have been





      *******************************
      From Frydrakken:

      Don't think I've ever read a single fic of Autumn's. Hearing people talking
      about preferring to gouge their own eyes out rather than read another of her
      stories is a pretty good anti-recommendation, mind you.


      _________________________________________________________________
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