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FIC: Whatever 1/1

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  • Autumn Biggins
    Title: Whatever Author: Autumn Summary: The truth is that I don t really care. Rating: PG-13, language Notes: I m upset, it s a bit dark. Also,
    Message 1 of 1 , Nov 17, 2001
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      Title: Whatever

      Author: Autumn

      Summary: "The truth is that I don't really care."

      Rating: PG-13, language

      Notes: I'm upset, it's a bit dark. Also, blame Matt for this
      one. His beautifully, angsty "Thoughts" put me in the mood to write
      this one.



      ===============================================================


      Logan isn't going to come back. I know it and Scott knows it
      too. Jean isn't going to be back either, she left with Logan.
      Whatever. Two narcissists deserve each other; there really isn't
      anything to debate about that. I don't care anymore. I just wish
      Scott could see it that way.


      He doesn't understand that people like us can never be
      happy. I mean, he can kill with a look and I can kill with a touch,
      doesn't really qualify either of us for social success. Whatever.


      The looks I get from the rest of the mansion are starting to
      piss me off. 'Oh Rogue, how terrible.' 'Poor dear.' 'You'll find
      someone better.' No shit sherlock. Logan is pretty much a bastard.
      I mean yeah, he did save my life, but not for the right reasons. He
      did it to impress Jean; I saw that in my head.

      But they are wrong on one account. I won't find someone
      better than Logan. I won't find anyone at all. People are afraid of
      me, and mutants are terrified. I'm like a piranha in a tank of
      goldfish. They're all afraid I'll brush up against them and drain
      their precious life away. Again I don't care. Whatever.


      The one thing I did learn from Logan is to only trust
      people as far as you can throw them. That way when they fuck you
      over at least it isn't a surprise. Take Scott for example, he loved
      Jean- a lot, more than his own life probably and look where it's
      gotten him. He just sits around now, his body tense with rage and
      fighting a Logan simulation in the danger room. He's beaten Logan 12
      times now. He's fought Logan 12 times. I think if Scott ever sees
      Logan again he'll kill him. Whatever.


      I had a crush on Logan for a brief time, who wouldn't? But
      that's not the point. The thing is I knew what I was getting into.
      He's a slut, a bastard, and to be blunt a complete dick. Logan comes
      first in his book, and that's how it is. Still, he's damn hot, so is
      Jean. Whatever.


      I'm getting sick of the stupid little remarks made about what
      a fucking Greek tragedy this all is. There isn't any subtext to what
      happened, or some great conspiracy, it's simple really. Logan and
      Jean are attracted to each other. They acted on that attraction, and
      that's it. Scott and I got left behind. Na-na-na hey life goes on.

      Don't get me wrong, what they did hurt a lot of people, I'm not
      saying that it didn't. The professor was disappointed because his
      favorite, Jean, acted in a way that went against his view of her,
      perfection, rationality and selflessness. Jean isn't a bad person
      for it or anything; she just let lust cloud her judgement for
      awhile. Logan, I have less tolerance for. He knew how much Scott
      cares for Jean and he chose to gratify his own wants and ignore
      Scott's feelings completely. That makes him much guiltier in my
      book. Guilt, innocence, justice, lust, love, revenge, whatever.

      Despite what many think, I'm not leaving here because I'm so crushed
      by Logan's rejection of me, Christ, I never was stupid enough to
      assume that he had any romantic intentions toward me. He wanted to
      fuck me, yes, but I'm not into his one-night stand type of
      lifestyle. It wouldn't have worked for wither or us; Things are
      better the way they went down. We got what we wanted, well Scott
      didn't, but I think he'll come out of this a stronger and less naive
      person for it.

      I got the most out of this little experience. I learned how the
      world really works, and a recipe for living. You can't change the
      inevitable, but you can deal with it in a variety of different ways.
      Things happen, you accept them and move on, or you hang onto them
      until they consume you in a fire of rage and furry. What's done is
      done. Whatever.








      ******************************************************************


      "The Sweeter the sin, the bitter the taste, in my mouth."-U2


      " I see a girl of the night with a baby in her hand
      Under an old streetlight next to a garbage can
      Now she put her kid away and she's gonna get ahead
      She hates her life and what she's done with it
      That's one more kid that'll never go to school
      Never get to fall in love, never get to be cool"
      -Rockin' in the Free World, Neil Young


      "In this life, there are nothing but posibilities."-Empire Records

      Lucas: Waren, look what you took. Rap, metal, rap, metal, Whitney Houston?
      Waren: Its for my girlfriend.
      Lucas: Sure it is. A guy like you needs to diminsh his criminal impulses,
      not magnify them!
      - Empire Records





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