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FIC: of Scott and Logan (1/1)

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  • claude
    Title: of Scott and Logan Author: C. Bart Email: dce@dlc.fi Web Page: http://www.dlc.fi/~dce/fic/index.html Rating: PG Archive:
    Message 1 of 1 , Oct 26, 2001
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      Title: of Scott and Logan
      Author: C. Bart
      Email: dce@...
      Web Page: http://www.dlc.fi/~dce/fic/index.html
      Rating: PG
      Archive: Nowhere without my written permission.
      Disclaimers: X-Men belong to Marvel and the movieverse versions
      owe a little something to Bryan Singer & co. I'm just
      borrowing them for a little while and no infringement
      is intended. This story, however, belongs to me.
      Summary: Jean thinks about stuff. Jean POV, movieverse
      Notes: Many thanks to Kara and Dawn for beta reading :)
      Feedback: That's a rhetorical question, right?


      OF SCOTT AND LOGAN
      by C. Bart
      <dce@...>
      (c)2001


      I once read somewhere that there are basically two kinds of people -
      those who stay, and those who won't. Me, I'm one of those who stays.
      Oh, I may have to travel quite a bit because of my work, and being an
      X-Man all but guarantees that I find myself at all kinds of
      interesting locations, but I'm always glad to be back home. Scott's
      much the same way. I think it may have something to do with the way we
      grew up.

      I've been with Scott for so long it would be hard, if not impossible,
      to imagine my life without him. Our roots have grown strong together,
      delving deep and intertwining with each other so, that by now, they
      are practically inseparable.

      Flirting with Logan was... well, fun. As much as I love Scott, it is
      still flattering to be occasionally reminded that he's not the only
      man who finds me appealing. Flirting can be fun and quite harmless
      unless one allows it to get out of hand. I don't believe I did that.

      Logan *is* an extremely attractive man. He has that Neanderthal
      quality, the air of danger which clings to him like blood cells to
      fibrin. I suppose it is that whole bad-boy image we women do respond
      to so readily. But, while I admit that rebels and mysterious strangers
      make wonderfully fascinating characters in books and in films, real
      life is a different matter altogether. In real life, I don't want a
      'bad-boy'. What I want is a man who stays. One whom I *know* I can
      depend on, and not just in a battle. A man who can give me strength as
      well as accept it from me in return.

      I am not perfect, and neither is Scott, but together we're both
      better. Still not perfect, but better. I like who I am when I'm with
      him, and I know he feels the same way about me. Part of it has to do
      with having been together for so long that we know each other's little
      quirks, but it's not all simply about shared history. It also has to
      do with... well, Scott. Of what and who he is. Of the kind of person
      he is. See, not a lot of people really *get* Scott. They look at him
      and listen to him, and then they make the mistake of taking him at
      face value. Because he *appears* to be the kind of man one can, and
      one should, take at face value. And he's not.

      Scott is a lot like Logan in that neither of them wears their heart on
      their sleeve. Albeit they go about it very differently, both of them
      guard their innermost thoughts and emotions incredibly tightly.

      One would never guess it by simply looking at Scott, but he is very
      passionate and he feels most things unbelievably deeply. He may appear
      serious and somewhat stiff on the outside but inside, there is a
      veritable cornucopia of emotions fighting to be freed. Every now and
      again he allows some of it to spill over but for the most part, he
      prefers to keep those feelings tightly secured.

      Control.

      Scott cultivates it like no other. At one time, it was a necessity;
      literally a question of life and death. It is still necessary, only to
      a somewhat lesser degree. I know he sometimes worries over losing his
      control. Of what might happen should he ever allow himself to
      completely let go of that control. There are times when I wish he
      *did* let go, but I know that is something he could do as naturally as
      he could stop breathing altogether. 'Restraint' truly is his middle
      name, which is why it is fortunate that I'm a telepath. Not that he
      doesn't talk to me, but sometimes he tends to overly ruminate things
      before actually verbalizing them.

      However, I am not complaining nor would I want to change him. You see,
      there is one place Scott can, and does, let go of his precious
      control. Not altogether, but for the most part. Yes, that's right. In
      the privacy of our room his shields drop and he allows me to explore
      the uncharted parts of his sometimes tumultuous inner universe to my
      heart's content.

      Because he loves me.

      Because he trusts me.

      Trust.

      Another thing Scott and Logan have in common. They both have trouble
      trusting people, opening up. Living near a telepath, trust becomes
      even a bigger issue.

      As a rule, I do not go around eavesdropping in people's minds, not
      even in Scott's, but there are times when I do pick up things
      unintentionally. Grand emotions, especially if they come about
      suddenly and unexpectedly, tend to leak out in such a manner which
      makes them extremely difficult to ignore.

      In choosing to be with me, Scott has had to more or less give up his
      privacy. Every couple does that to a degree, but most people get to at
      least keep their thoughts private. I know it hasn't always been easy
      on Scott, but as he once told me, he made up his mind a long time ago.
      In his view, the pros more than outweigh the cons. Talk about an ego
      booster. He has trusted himself to me, and I trust him to stay.

      Logan, on the other hand, is a wanderer, and he's never attempted to
      pretend otherwise. That is one of the things I like best about him. He
      doesn't apologize for being himself. Take him or leave him, he is who
      he is. Period.

      Of course, sometimes that simply means that he is being pigheaded, but
      that's another story.

      Logan's been gone for nearly eight months, but I know he'll be back -
      one day. He's not one to break a promise. He'll be back, but I don't
      think he'll stay. Sooner or later, he will leave again.

      I hope he finds what he is looking for. I do. Because even wanderers
      need to know where their roots are.


      - fin -


      --
      Claude
      dce@...

      "I'm the best there is at what I do... and what I do isn't very pretty."
      - Wolverine

      "Once, I saw him relax. He made me promise I wouldn't tell."
      - Iceman on Cyclops
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