Fic: Living Without Him R/L, R/B [G]
- Title: Living Without Him
Sumary: Marie/Logan and some Marie/Bobby, Rogue must
start a new life after Logan leaves to find his old
one. Just angst.
Disclaimer: Not mine� I really wish Logan were but
unfortunately, he�s not. They belong to Marvel.
Archiving: Forbidden Love, everyone else ask first.
Feedback: I�m begging!
The door shut and just like that, he was gone.
Marie clasped the dog tags tightly; they still had his
warmth from resting on his chest. She closed his eyes,
trying to capture him in her mind: his unshaven face,
his deep eyes, his oddly soft voice, his tight�
Swallowing, she pushed away the image. He was gone and
wishing wouldn�t change that. He had promised to come
back though. But then, he had also promised to protect
her and he couldn�t very well do that from Canada.
She heard a motor rumbling. All her schoolmates
interupted their fun and games in order to run to the
window. She didn�t move from the spot, half-hoping
that the door would open again and he would appologize
for leaving her alone.
But a voice broke into her daydream. It was female,
and overly cheerful. �Hey, Rogue, you�re friend�s
stealing Mr.Summer�s bike!�
She hung the dog tags around her neck and hurried to
the window. She arrived just in time to see her
leather clad hero vanish through the mansion gates.
The excitement over, the young mutants of Xavier�s
School for Gifted Youngsters returned to their
foosball and lounging.
Marie didn�t move. She continued to stare out of the
window, hoping beyond hope that she wouldn�t have to
spend another 8 months � or more � all by herself.
Minutes passed and he didn�t return but Marie just
stood there clutching his gift. She didn�t even notice
the moiture in her eyes.
Bobby stared over the top of his book towards the
window. He wasn�t really reading. He had stopped even
pretending to read ten minutes before. He was too
focused on the form standing motionless at the window.
She looked so� lost. He wanted to do something. The
problem was that he wasn�t entirely sure what that
something was or if he should even do it. He put down
his book and started to rise when a fireball was
shoved into his face.
�Flame on!� Johnny said with as much dramatic flare as
her could muster. �So, what do you think?�
Bobby had no idea what his best friend and occasional
rival was talking about and it was clear on his face.
He really had no patience for this right now. The
blond just shrugged at his friend�s dubious
�All comic book super heroes have catch phrases.� He
said by way of explanation. �So?�
�You�re a dork.�
Johnny extinguished his fire and placed himself
purposely between Bobby Drake and the object of his
attention. He crossed his arms over his chest in a
possition that indicated that he wanted to argue about
something. Bobby sighed.
Knowing there was no way to stop his friend when he
got into one of these moods, Bobby settled himself on
the couch and waited. It was the fastest way to get
�I�m a dork? The Iceman has been spending the last
fifteen minutes staring at some girl, very cool.�
Bobby caught a glance of her over his friend�s
shoulder. He could see her slender waist, her elegant
opera gloves, and the way her hair fell around her
face like a halo when she tilted her head.
�She�s not just some girl, John, she�s�� He started
and almost ran towards her but Johnny�s hands were on
his shoulders. �She�s crying!�
�And what are you going to do about it? Will you do
the sensitive guy act; make her forget her strong,
ruggedly handsome savior in your arms?� John blew out
a small flame that had ignited on his finger, showing
how he felt about that idea.
�Are you in love with him too?� Bobby raised his
eyebrow, hoping to shame the older boy into letting
Johnny just shrugged. �I just know when to cut my
losses. Hey, Jubes! You�re cooler then this guy, tell
me what you think.�
Left alone once more, Bobby tried to must up his
courage. He noticed ice crusting up on his hands, a
nervous habbit of his. He rid himself of the ice and
straightened his clothes. He took a deep breath and
walked towards her.
But she was already standing next to him.
�He�s kind of a jerk isn�t he?�
Bobby was startled for a moment. It hadn�t occurred to
him that she might have been able to overhear their
She smiled weakly. �I still have Logan�s super
hearing.� She clutched at something hanging around her
neck. �He left me a lot of things.�
But he hadn�t left her what she wanted was what was
Bobby bit his lip. He had made a mess of things
without even saying a word to her yet. He racked his
brain, trying to figure out how to fix this. Then
�Yeah, Johnny can be� difficult. I think he means well
but he needs someone to keep him humble.� His eyes
shone wickedly as he pointed at his friend. �Watch.�
Across the recreation room, John was standing in front
of Jubilee. The young Asian girl sat with her hands
resting on her lap. She was watching John with a wide
smile though she might have been humoring him.
For his part, Johnny was posturing in front of her;
there was no other word for it. Carefully, he made a
little flame rose and moved towards Jubilee.
�Copycat.� Bobby mumbled but he was still grinning. He
nudged Rogue, careful not to touch her skin, and
extended his hand. A thin, almost invisible sheet of
ice extended from his hand.
It looked like little more than mist but it settled,
unnoticed on the ground beneath Johnny�s foot. When
John shifted his weight to present his creation to
Jubilee, he slipped. He fell in a less than dignified
manner, his elegant gift sputtering into harmless
Bobby turned towards Rogue to catch her reaction. He
saw her hide a giggle behind her hand before becoming
somber once more. She smiled at him and turned to
�Wait!� He was somewhat surprised to actually see her
pause and for a moment, didn�t know what to add. �Will
you join us for supper?�
She seemed to think for a moment. Her eyes were
lowered and she stroked the chain around her neck.
Then, she noded, slowly and stifly, but she nodded.
Bobby watched her go with a sigh. He continued to
stare wistfully into space until a hand clamped onto
�Ok,� Johnny started with remarkable calm. �I get the
crush thing. Rogue is hot, no one�s denying it. But do
you really have to include me in your downfall?�
He got ready to defend himself but instead of anger,
he was faced with his friends smile. John patted him
on the back and started to lead him out of the room.
�I�ll get you back for that. Now come on, lets get you
ready for supper so you don�t have to resort to
humiliating me again.�
Kitty Pryde, aka Shadow Cat, shook her head at her two
friends. She didn�t get men sometimes� well most of
the time. She plunged into the wall in front of her
and headed off to the room asigned to the young women.
Rogue closed the door to her room and headed stright
for her bed. There were four other beds in the room
and hers was the one furthest from the door in order
to minimize the chance of anyone stumbling over her in
the middle of the night.
She collapsed on the bed, burrying her head in the
pillow. She wanted to cry, she really did, but she
couldn�t do it. The little bit of Logan still inside
her refused itself that weakness. She could have
pushed it away but at the moment that was the last
thing she wanted to do.
She tried to focus on Bobby and John�s hijinks; they
were trying to cheer her up she knew. But the only
image that came to mind was Logan holding her as she
cried or holding her head desperately when he thought
she was dead. He might never hold her like that again.
She almost cried then but she couldn�t.
�I�ve never had a boyfriend or anything, especially
not as handsome as your Logan. But being a mutant,
I�ve lost people like everyone else; they�re afraid, I
think. It�s hard. It hurts every day but you�ve got to
keep living, you know? Because otherwise, if they come
back, you won�t be the person they loved or even if
they don�t, you�ll never find someone else to love
Marie recognized the voice, though she didn�t know it
well. It was one of her roommates, Kathy or Kitty. She
didn�t want to look up at her; she didn�t want to
acknowledge her helpful banter. But something within
her propelled her into a sitting position.
She looked the other girl straight in the eye. �I�ve
She had said it to rid herself of Kitty but the moment
she said it, she realized that it was true. Her first
boyfriend, her friends, her parents, her sister and
now Logan, she had lost them all. Something within her
broke at that realization. She started to cry.
It was just a few quiet sniffles at first but it grew
until she found herself sobbing on Kitty�s shoulder.
The other girl held her tight and rubbed her back.
You�re not alone kid.
Marie started and looked around the room frantically.
She could have sworn that she had heard him. But she
was alone in the room� with Kitty Pryde.
She wiped her eyes with the back of her gloved hand
and nodded a quick thank you. Kitty moved back to her
bed but she continued to watch her. Marie didn�t say
anything for a long time; she waited to hear the voice
again. But it was gone. Finally, she looked at Kitty
and tried to smile.
�I,� she swallowed. �I promised Bobby that I�d have
supper with y�all.�
Kitty�s face lit up and she dashed out of the room. To
tell the others of her success perhaps, Marie didn�t
She stood up and went to the window. She took out the
dog tags and ran her fingers along the name Wolverine
etched into one of them. She didn�t feel better, not
really. Logan was still gone and she was still alone.
A few words from an aquaintance couldn�t change that.
But maybe she could make it until he came back.
�Just come back to me Logan.�
She gave the dog tags one last touch and placed them
under her pillow. With a sigh, she left the room for
supper. She could do this; she could live as long as
he came back to her one day.
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