Fic: " The Two People I Am Inside" PG-13 (1/1) [Scott, ( Rogue)]
- Hi again,
I wrote this, as you can see, months back but this story is.........dark and strange so........anyway, you can read it and see for yourself.
I have placed it in the movieverse but the story can fit the comics anywhere you want it too.
Warnings: This story may contain some disturbing elements.
This is a dark story!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Feedback: Is loved. Please?
The Two People I Am Inside By Nadja Lee 3/12/01
English is not my native language. Please forgive me my mistakes.
Disclaimer: X-men and all the characters here belong to Marvel , 20 Century Fox and I intend no infringement, this is a piece of amateur fan fiction, and I make no money of it.
Only the original idea contained within this work is the property of the author. Please do not copy this story to any website or archive without permission of the author.
Timeline: Set after the movie
Universe: Movie (or comic)
Pairing: Scott/Jean, Scott/Storm
Summary: The two voices in Scotts head fights for control
Archiving: Want, ASK, take, have.
Feedback: Yes, please. My e-mail address is neh@....
Rating: PG - 13
Thanks to Christina for the Beta.
We all have two faces. The one we show the world and the one we hide in the shadows
- Val Kilmer as Batman in Batman Forever
Rogue? Rogue, are you alright? Cyclops asked concerned as he found the young girl. Or rather he saw her hand sticking out through the rubbles. He had taken Rogue for a shopping trip where they had run into a newly escaped Magneto and his mutants. Cyclops had prepared for a fight and had stood in front of Rogue which had turned out to be a mistake as Magneto only wanted to cover his escape. He had made some brigs and part of a building fall towards Cyclops and Rogue. Cyclops had tried to push Rogue out of the way but hadnt quite succeeded. Now she was trapped beneath the debris.
Ah´m alright but Ah`m stuck, Rogue answered, fear in her voice. Two big poles had made a kind of shelter for her but how long would it hold? He couldnt blast her free without hitting her but he had to do something. Cyclops took hold of Rogues gloved hand sticking out from the rubbles and knew what he had to do.
Ill take off your glove. Touch me and you can use my powers to blast yourself free, Cyclops said to her.
* Are you mad?! What if she cant control it? Shell find out . find out...about me* Scott hissed in his mind.
* Back off. This is the right thing to do* Cyclops demanded and began to remove Rogues glove.
* Do this and youll lose everything you hold dear. Charless respect, Jeans love all gone. Do you really think theyll still care if they knew whom you are inside? * Scott asked mercilessly.
* You are wrong. You are no part of me. Go away* Cyclops demanded.
* Im no part of you? Cyclops, I AM you, * Scott reminded him with a hard laughter.
* NO! Ill have nothing to do with you. I locked you away long away. *
* Cyclops, Cyclops. You are deceiving yourself. You are the illusion and I the real thing. You are nothing but Charless creation. You have no real life, no real emotions. I am Scott Summers. I am real. I live. I feel, * Scott said and something made Cyclops stop his hands way towards Rogues now ungloved one.
* That that is not true. I am Cyclops. I lead the X-men. I follow Xaviers dream of peace. I do what I must. What is right, no matter what. My pleasures are few, I live for the team and for the dream. *
*Who are you trying to fool? Me or yourself? I was here first, remember? Remember back in time . * Scott demanded harshly.
* NO. I will not. It will bring nothing. *
* But it will. Itll make you see the truth. The truth that I am the real thing. I live and I feel. *
* Nothing you can show me will weaken me. My belief is too strong, * Cyclops said but his tone lacked the confidence of his words.
* Then journey with me through the memories you have suppressed. Your birth by two loving parents. Your parents death. Your loneliness at the orphanage. That was where I started to live, remember? The older boys bullied you, teased you, hurt you. I would help you. I beat them up and I did it good. Remember how I send a few of them to the hospital? Remember how good it felt to unleash all that anger, hate and frustration into another? The trill you felt by it even as a part of you was repulsed by it? *
* I was just a kid. I did not know how wrong I was, * Cyclops protested.
* Really? Lets move on then. To Jack. Remember Jack? Remember the beatings he gave you? Remember the fear, the frustration, the anger and the hate? Remember what I did to him when you were finally old enough to stand up to him? Remember how I burned him to ashes with my eyes? * Excitement was in Scotts voice.
* No. Be quit. I will not hear it. I I cant remember any of this, * Cyclops protected.
* I think you can. You have just buried it deep down. Remember how you ran from the cops after Jacks murder? That was how you came to live on the streets. Remember the things I did to make you survive. Nobility and goodness will only get you killed on the streets. What matters is brutality and force; violence, and I gave you that. Remember the secret pleasure you took in the fear in the others eyes when they saw you? Finally you were the strong. *
* You are wrong. I Im not like that, * Cyclops denied. He couldnt be like that could he?
* Even after Xavier found you and made Cyclops, made all that goodness and perfection come forth I was still here. When you were in battle I was free. I ravished in the blood and pain, in the violence and hate. That was my world. And remember; I AM you, * Scott reminded him with the mercilessness he had come to have.
* You are NOT me. I will have nothing to do with you. Leave me, * Cyclops demanded.
* I cant. You never understood that, did you? All people have a light and a dark side. But you, like your creator, Charles, have suppressed your dark nature. But it still lives inside you and only waits to break free. And believe me; one day I WILL have control. You cant trap me in here forever. No human can. *
* Im damn well gonna try, * Cyclops said determined and his hand reached for Rogues again.
* Fine, then touch the brat. See what good saving her will do you. Do you really think your love, Jean, the perfect and goody to shoes Jean, will love you when she through Rogue sees me? Will she be able to look your monster in the eyes and still give love? No one has ever done that. Will Charles be able to? What will they say when they see that when you say `love me` you mean `hurt me`? * Scott warned and Cyclops stopped again.
* They they love me, * Cyclops protested weakly.
* No. Thats where you are wrong. They love the illusion you have made. They love Cyclops. But will they ever be able to love Scott Summers, will all his hate and frustration? Will all his loneliness and despair? Will all his distaste in authorities? Will all his faults and scars? Will they really? *
* I . Yes! Jean loves me. She loves me, * Cyclops insisted.
* It isnt me you should try to convince but then again maybe it isnt me youre trying to convince after all, Scott said softly. There was silence for a while before he spoke again;
*Did you really think that you could break the ring? *
* What ring? *
* The ring of life. Your childhood was filled with pain. With sorrows and scars. Pain produces pain and . hate produces hate. All people ever showed you were that; hate, anger beatings and punishment . loneliness an outcast. Did you really think you could break the circle? That you could remain strong? Never break down? What you wouldnt give in to that anger and hate they have planted in you? Surprise, Cyclops. You are NOT and will never be infallible. You have blood on your hands that you just wouldnt see. You have done wrongs in your life that you refuse to see. You seek lifes pleasures as much as the next. I AM you, Cyclops. I know your thoughts, your dreams of Ororo, of unleashing the fire within her and fly free with her. Break free from all the responsibility and what is right. *
* Get away from me. This is the right thing to do, * Cyclops said determined and moved his hand closer to Rogues.
* It may be the right thing to do but it isnt what you want to do. You risk losing all. Dont be a fool. No one has seen you with her. Leave the girl. *
* But . she could die. *
* So what? People die every day. What is one more? * Scott asked coldly. Unknown to Cyclopss conscious mind, his hand had stopped again.
* I care for her. *
* Sure you do but think what will happen. What you risk losing. Look out for number one and leave her. She might even survive. *
For a while Cyclops looked like he was actually considering this. The thought of losing Jean and Charles scared him.
* NO! I will not do as you say. She is my friend and I love her. She is worth the risk even if she should find out . about you, * Cyclops said firmly and his hand was inches from Rogues.
* Remember, Cyclops, I AM you and I cant be defeated. Im a part of you and always will be. And one day . I WILL win this battle. For I am the real Scott. You were made. Forged by Charless dream. I am not. If anything Im his worst nightmare. A man with scars on body and soul who will fight back, who will never be defeated. A man who will always come up on top . because he didnt give a shit about the others. Because he actually found a sick pleasure in seeing them hurt you, you seek the hurt they bring you, I, I seek the pain I give them, * Scott warned as Cyclops hand was near Rogues.
* Then Ill fight you. Again and again if I have to. You may be a part of me but it is no part Ill ever allow to win. You may have been forged by the cruelty of my childhood but I was forged by the love for a dream, * Cyclops said determined and his hand brushed Rogues.
* Go ahead and try. Lets see who is the strongest in time; a naive dream . or cold, hard reality. Lets see who comes out on top, * Scott said with a cruel laughter as Cyclops took a firm grip on Rogues hand.
Ahhhhhh! Cyclops screamed in pain as Rogue sucked the life and his powers from him. His mind was slipping and the never ending fight in his head was for once quit as Rogue got both his powers and voices.
* Let her deal with them for a while. Im so tired of fighting all the time, * Cyclops thought weakly as he lost consciousness.
* One day, Cyclops I will be free, * Scotts voice whispered as Cyclopss world went black.
That wasn`t so bad, was it? Wait, on second thought, don`t answer that*G*