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1186FIC: The Game 2.1 'Pawn' (PG-13)

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  • blackdiamond
    Nov 1, 2000
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      TITLE: Pawn

      AUTHOR: BlackDiamond

      RATING: PG-13 (bad words)

      'SHIP: Scott/Jean/Logan, like always . . . They just have so many possibilities.

      SERIES: Yeah! I finally decided on a name for this series. 'The Game', which is a reference to a comment that Kat made, about Logan being a pawn in a game he didn't know was being played. It stuck with me as a totally acurate description of what was going on, so this is now called 'The Game'.

      SUMMARY: Live's shatter, but life goes on.

      WARNING: Slightly disturbing concepts. Ye be warned.

      AUTHOR'S NOTE: I have a new system for the parts in this here series. This is the first instalment of the second part. 'Trash', 'Make Me Bad' and 'Rubble' are instalments one, two and three of part one. I think this will end up being a trilogy of trilogies. Got that? *G* I'm not sure I do either, so don't feel bad.

      DEDICATION: To Kat, for making me cry with the beauty of her feedback. She and she alone (almost litteraly *glares*) sent me feedback (I love you Eil, and Elizabeth *G*) and it was some of the most amazing things anyone had ever said to me, left me stunned, unable to function for a good day. So this is for you, Kat. Huggles. And the other rare few. *good natured grumbles*

      FEEDBACK: Even if you don't like it, at least let me know you read it! I'm dyin' for somethin' outta any of ya, absolutely anything!!!

      ARCHIVING: Anyone who wants it can have it. I'm like an archive whore. All I want for payment is where it's going.

      DISCLAIMER: Not mine, no money, don't sue.

      CATCH UP (for those who haven't read the first three{read them!}): Jean is having an 'affair' with Logan, though it's not really in the traditional sense. She still loves Scott, and she's just using Wolvie for some wild sex. Logan knows this but he loves her too much to stop it because he knows it's probably the only way he'll ever be able to have her. Scott also knows about it, and also loves her too much to do anything, until he snaps. 'Rubble' ended with Scott walking out on Jean, and Jean in their room crying.

      This picks up minutes after the end of 'Rubble', which is from Scott's POV if you want to get his mindset.


      Pawn In The Game


      There's no point in living

      If you can't feel alive . . .

      ~The World Is Not Enough



      Logan really needed some good whiskey, but since this was a school and there wasn't any hard liquor, he was going to have to settle for some shitty beer. Getting up and going to the kitchen was not what he wanted to do at three am, but there he was, silently padding his way down the stairs.

      Scott tossing and turning on the couch in the TV room was the last thing he needed and he almost turned around, except for the fact that he could already almost taste the bad import piss sliding down his throat. Oh well, maybe he'll ignore me. No such luck.

      Without sitting up or turning his unglassed closed eyes, Scott spoke quietly. Anger burned in his voice but was almost drowned out by the pain. "I hope she was worth it."

      Growling just loud enough to get his point across Logan kept walking. "I know she's a good fuck, but that's not all she was to me, Wolverine."

      Logan stopped in his tracks, picking up the salty tang of tears in the air. Shit. "Don't. Not right now, One-Eye."

      Scott didn't seem to understand no. "When would be a good time for you, Wolverine? When this kills us all? When it eats us alive? WHEN!?!"

      He had never seen anything like this from Scott before, never seen this kind of emotion. Sure he'd pissed the boy scout off before, but this was pure rage. Rage fueled by betrayl of the worst kind. This had to be dealt with, right now.

      "Fine." Logan sat down on the coffee table facing the couch, waiting for Scott to put on his glasses and look at him. "What do you want to hear? That I'm completely in love with her? I am you know, but I wasn't the one who started it."

      Scott's confusion was hidden by rose quartz, but his voice betrayed him. "What are you talking about? What do you mean?"

      Finally finding a way to wound the man who owned the woman Logan wanted, he took it. "She came to me the first time."

      The silence was physically painful, the roaring of Scott's heart so loud in the room. "Leave me alone, Logan. What's happened is bad enough, let's not make it any worse."

      "If it can get any worse." Logan's bitter words followed by his bitter laughter were enough to make Scott really look at him for the first time since this whole thing began. The man called Wolverine looked miserable, like a kicked dog who just wanted let back inside.

      After a moment Logan spoke again, his voice so low Scott wasn't sure he heard it at all. "She says your name."

      Scott's head dropped into his hands. He slipped the rose tinted glasses out of the grooves on his nose and let them drop to the floor. He took a few deep breaths then, because they seemed to be speaking the truth with an unspoken truce, said, "She's still saying it to you."

      Logan just grunted and got up, going into the kitchen. When he came back he was carrying a six-pack and dropped it over the couch beside Scott, coming around and sitting on the other side.

      Feeling his way over the blanket to the beer when he heard Logan crach his open Scott knocked the first one back in one long chug. "Thanks."

      "No problem," was the gruff reply.

      The room remained silent as the supply of beer steadily lessened until both mens heads whipped around at the same moment. Logan could smell her and Scott knew the sound of her footsteps better than his own.

      "Sco-" She broke off as her head came around the corner and she saw the two men sitting on the couch together. Logan smelled that same salty tang and realized that he had smelled Jean's tears on Scott earlier, seeing the puffy eyes and tracked face.

      Scott leaned his unprotected head against the back of the couch slowly. Logan noticed that without his glasses he seemed way more human, and way younger. He really was just a boy. "Jeannie," Logan said quietly as he stood and left the room, taking the last beer with him outside.

      Jean flashed him a grateful smile as she sat down in his vacated spot on the couch. "Scott," she said gently, laying her hand on his shoulder.

      He leaned into her for a moment before he pulled away as if burned. "Jean, don't. You can't fix this. I can't fix this. It can't be fixed."

      She sucked in a hitching breath at his words. "Please, we can try . . . I love you. I'm not giving up on us."

      He laughed, the sound like daggers made to strip and flay her heart. "You gave up on us the minute you went to him." He stopped for a minute to catch his breath. "Love isn't always enough, Jean."

      "What's that supposed to mean?" she asked slowly, the irony of her words not lost on him.

      "We both love you and look were it got us."

      That morning the first person awake, like always, was Ororo. She did a double take when she saw Scott sleeping on the couch, Logan on the chair beside him, and Jean nowhere in sight. They were both fully clothed and appeared to have been up for most of the night.

      Deciding that whatever had happened was no one else's business she woke them both up. With coffee. Strong black coffee.

      "Thanks 'Roro," Logan said gruffly as she heald the sup under his nose to wake him up.

      "Yeah, thanks 'Ro," Scott then said. Ororo waited until Scott found his glasses and put them on before she handed him his cup.

      She sat down on the couch beside Scott, glad she was an early riser and there weren't any classes for another two hours. "Why are you two sleeping in the den?" She tried to keep the tone light but it didn't really work with the misery that hung in the room like a cheap air freshener.

      "It's a long story, 'Roro, and you wouldn't really like it." Despite the coffee Logan wasn't in a good mood. Not that he had been in any mood besides homicidal for the last few weeks thought Ororo.

      "Try me. I've always liked stories." She leaned back and turned towards the men slightly.

      Scott stood up then, his blanket dropping to the ground. "It's none of your business." And with that he walked out, leaving a stunned Windrider and Wolverine in his wake.

      "I gather it's serious then." It was so unlike Scott to do things like that. Sure he was a little anal retentive, but he was never rude.

      Logan's laugh was unexpected under the circumstances, though it shouldn't have been. "That's an understatement if I ever heard one."

      "So what's going on, Logan?"

      "Are you sure you want to know?" He looked her in the eye and the intensity there was more then she could take, so she nodded rather than risk her voice.

      The wait seemed to last forever before Logan broke eye contact to stand. "Slim's right. It's none of your business."

      He was stopped in the doorway by Ororo's voice. "Is it about Jean? She hasn't been herself lately."

      Logan shook his head and without turning around said, "Yeah, it's about Jeannie."


      TBC soon. Let me know where you want this to go . . . *nudge nudge hint hint*

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