Wrestling-Online Newsletter #1513
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/ _ \| \| | | |_ _| \| | __| Issue #1513
| (_) | .` | |__ | || .` | _| Saturday February 1st 2003
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>> OPENING WORDS FROM THE EDITORBy Colin Vassallo, [Editor@...]
Very sad day today. I assume everyone saw the horrible pictures on TV by
now as wherever you switch images of Columbia space shuttle debris
flying down is on the air. It certainly sucks to be 16 minutes away from
landing and all of a sudden the spacecraft breaks up in tons of pieces.
You survive the take-off, the experiments, orbiting around the world and
then fade to black in the final few minutes. Destiny my friends.
Own a piece of WWE, get your framed stock certificate now!
In a 384 hardcover book, wrestling legend Jerry 'The King' Lawler
reveals all in his new autobiography titled 'It's Good To Be The
King...Sometimes.' Lawler details his illustrious wrestling career
from his early days in Memphis, to his much publicized feud with
comedian Andy Kaufman, his journey in WWE, the divorce from Stacy
'The Kat' Carter and many more! Get the book now for just $18.20
>> WORLD WRESTLING ENTERTAINMENT NEWShttp://www.wrestling-online.com/news
> RATINGS- Smackdown! received a 3.2 rating with a 5.0 share for Thursday's show,
down from last week's 3.5. The show was pre-empted in seven different
areas across the nation which resulted in a lower rating than usual.
(Ratings compiled by Nielsen Media Research and put online by
> MORE AXXESS INFORMATION- WWE.COM announced that Axxess will be taking place at the Seahawks
Stadium West Field Plaza and tickets for the three day event will go on
sale on March 1st. Only 2,000 tickets will be available for each session
and each ticket will cost $40. Limiting the number of tickets will
enable fans in attendance to have more opportunity to get autographs and
stay in shorter lines to meet their favorite WWE superstars.
> WWE STOCK NEWS- In a document filed yesterday at the Securities & Exchange Commission
it was revealed that Artisan Partners Limited Partnership has purchased
a total of 899,300 in World Wrestling Entertainment Class A Common
> SMACKDOWN! YOUR VOTE! CAMPAIGN TO START AGAIN- A conference is set for February 3rd at the National Press Club
Ballroom in Washington, DC., to announce the Smackdown! Your Vote 'A
Million More in 2004' campaign. Ohio Congressman Bob Ney and Minnesota
State representative Tony Sertich will be joined by WWE stars Kurt
Angle, Bradshaw, Maven, Ivory and CEO Linda McMahon at the conference to
make this announcement.
> TICKETS ON SALE- Only one show went on sale earlier today. Smackdown! tapings in
London, Ontario, Canada at the John Labatt Center on Tuesday February
25th. You can purchase tickets for this event by calling (519) 488-1012.
Prices are $50, $40, $25 and $15.
> A SUPERSTAR EVERY DAY AT THE WORLD THIS MONTH- A WWE superstar will be at The World every day for the month of
February to meet fans and host parties. The complex has been suffering
from lack of people in the past couple of years and after the events of
9/11 it has been hit even harder. So far The World still has yet to
produce a profit for WWE. Sending a different WWE superstar every day is
a move to get more people inside the restaurant and hopefully buy
merchandise and have a meal there as well.
>> KNIVES OUTBy Ian Hamilton, [ian.hamilton@...]
Well well well. the p*ssed off Brit is back with some more thoughts on
Thanks to everyone who e-mailed me with some feedback from my last
column. I'll point out now, that the Freebirds' first ring music was
Lynyrd Skynyrd's "Free Bird". And also, if you couldn't tell, I am from
England, and I don't regard football (or as it's called in Northern
America, "soccer") as a sh*tty sport - see the end of this column for
Anyway, the WWE has been busy this week, continuing the road to
WrestleMania. Stone Cold didn't appear on Raw again this week, with Eric
Bischoff instead hyping a copy of Raw magazine. At this rate, we'll not
see Austin until No Way Out in Montreal.
I'll have my Raw and SmackDown thoughts later on, but I'll open off with
some stuff about WrestleMania. The last two WrestleManias (17 and 18)
have been four hours long (yes, I know WrestleMania 16/2000 was four
hours long too, but that was a three hour show with the hour long recap
at the end of it). To date, WrestleMania 19 is also going to be a four
hour show, but if the WWE manage to pull off everything they want, I
have a feeling that they might want to stretch it to five hours.
Think about it. On the card we'll have Brock Lesnar vs Kurt Angle. That
in itself would be a worthy match to highlight any PPV of any year - let
alone "the Grand Daddy of them all". Unfortunately for them, a pure
wrestling match isn't going to get all of the WWE's promotional muscle
Right now, we've got Vince McMahon vs Hulk Hogan being prepared for
WrestleMania, and while that match might not be a technical masterpiece,
just the thought of the match is enough to get people buying the show.
about it - the man behind the whole "sports entertainment" genre up
against the guy who took the idea and ran with it like a runaway
juggernaut as the (then) WWF exploded into the mainstream.
On top of that we have the Chris Jericho vs Shawn Michaels programme,
which is sure to be blown off at WrestleMania. Adding to THAT is the
proposed Bill Goldberg vs The Rock match. Whilst no deal has yet been
signed between the WWE and Goldberg, it's thought that the Rock would
want a match with the former WCW champion as a part of his swansong,
before he buggers off into Hollywood on a permanent basis (and yes, when
Rocky makes up his mind, you can be sure that I'll have a lot to say on
But think about it - right now, we have four (provisional) matches on a
four hour show. Those matches are all guaranteed to hog the limelight,
and right now, I feel sorry for the midcarders. Anyone who's been added
to the WrestleMania card will only be getting a bit-part, as the show is
geared to the (unofficial) quadruple main event. So guys like Eddie
Guerrero, Booker T, Edge, Chris Benoit (and to a lesser extent) Rob Van
Dam and HHH will be getting slightly less TV time come WrestleMania.
Come to think of it - I get the feeling that HHH will find a way to make
sure that the quadruple main event either includes him (add his name to
the HBK/Y2J feud, anyone?), or is expanded to a quintuple main event,
with one main event being allocated to each hour.
With the WWE finally getting some stars back, it's about time the roster
split takes some meaning - maybe splitting the PPVs up would work? Take
away the "Classic Five" shows (Rumble, Mania, King of the Ring,
SummerSlam and Survivor Series); the remaining seven shows should
alternate between the brands. That means that the brands would usually
get two months to build up a meaningful storyline for a PPV match,
instead of rushing a storyline together in two weeks. Plus, with the
Classic Five PPVs, we should see some inter-brand matches - finally
giving the WWE a chance to put right what they f**ked up with on the
So Raw got a 4.1 this week - the first time in months that it's drawn a
rating above 4.0. Maybe it was the promise of Steve Austin returning
(sorry, you'll have to buy the PPV for that), or maybe it's the old fans
returning to see the road to WrestleMania start off - the WWE is
starting to go in the right direction again.
The WWE are finally starting to punish Jeff Hardy for his constant
tardiness - by giving him a publicised losing streak on TV. Maybe that
will teach him to stop showing up looking like a reject from a Marilyn
Is Al Snow still on the Raw roster? I only ask because it feels so god
damned long since the guy wrestled on TV. sticking with the ECW guys, is
it me, or is Tommy Dreamer one of the most over guys on Raw? Or is it
because he's on Raw when the WWE are in the old ECW areas?
Earth to JR - follow the script. "in the Dudleyz speciality, a ladder
match." Jim - it's a table match that the Dudleyz are supposed to like;
the ladder is Jeff Hardy's shtick. Spike Dudley was on Raw? So does that
mean he'll be off Heat and that Sky don't have to edit the "b*stard"
t-shirt out of his match? (in a word - no)
I've got to say that my liking of the new Sean O'Haire character is
increasing. I just got this awful feeling that the bookers are going to
drop the ball BIG TIME.
Dammit. B-2 has been released by the WWE. Well since Bull/Barry/B
Buchanan isn't going to be on SmackDown any more, I might as well do a
freestylin' tribute to the guy.
Make a mental note of this: Los Guerreros' "Cheat 2 Win" t-shirt debuted
on SmackDown in late January/early February 2003. Anyone fancy running a
sweepstake as to when they'll be on sale in the UK? Anyone who puts down
"Christmas" will automatically win :)
"yo yo yo... my last few gimmicks sucked worse than yo' momma... I've
bombed more times than the American air force... I've been dropped for a
D.O.G., and given that old pink slip look for me on an indy card, where
I'll still wrestle like a retard... BOOYAH!"
Okay, you're a WWE booker. You've invested a lot of TV time in an angle
that was meandering nowhere until you gave it a nonsensical twist. What
do you do? Continue the angle on Velocity of course! (I'm talking about
the Dawn Marie/Torrie feud, which was relegated to Velocity this week)
SmackDown showed us one thing - even Vince McMahon can get the crowd
going; just so long as he isn't shoved down our throats (for at least)
four hours a week.
What the f***? What have the WWE done to Brian Kendrick? As if the
"Spanky" gimmick weren't bad enough, dressing up as a fricking hotel
bell boy on national TV has got to be humiliating.
Bar the main Hogan/McMahon programme, I'm at a loss to see what other
angles the WWE are actively building. Lesnar vs Angle has been put on
hold while Lesnar attends to "personal issues" and while Angle guides
his Sucks Squad to tag team gold. The Guerreros are waiting to take on
Team Angle (heel vs heel? Anyone figure out what's going to be the
problem there?), and that's about it. Please WWE, don't rush the
WrestleMania card like we saw last year, with matches being fought over
fictitious Japanese shampoo commercials.
What do Victoria and the Undertaker have in common? They are the only
two WWE superstars whose ring music has hit #1 in the UK singles charts.
After Limp Bizkit's (monotonous, when you play it for a while) "Rollin'"
hit the top spot in September 2000, it was the turn of tATu to run away
with it this week. On Sunday February 2nd, tATu charted #1 in the UK
singles charts, with their debut single "All The Things She Said" (which
is currently being used as Victoria's entrance music).
With over 20,000 CDs sold in its first day on sale (last figures I'd
heard was something like 35,000 sales by the end of Thursday), tATu
removed the David Sneddon from the top spot. And for that, I say "thank
you D-Lo". It's about time that these manufactured, made-for-TV "pop
stars" were put in their place - and who better to do it than two
Russian "lesbians" in the form of Julia and Lena?
Still on this subject, I found it incredibly absurd that the British
media suddenly decided to protest about tATu's gimmick (the lesbian
thing). On the Thursday edition of "Richard and Judy", the two hosts
(Richard Madeley and Judy Finnegan) made the connection that because
tATu wear school uniforms for the video of "All The Things She Said",
that the people who listen to their music are all paedophiles.
Talk about hopping on the bandwagon - the video to the song has been
shown on UK television for about six weeks now, and they wait until the
CD's been released (for several days) before they kick up a fuss? Look -
I listen to Eminem and tATu, and I use the internet a lot. If you
believe what the British media said in January alone, I'd be a gangster
paedophile. (and no, I'm not that! I could rant on for longer, but at
the end of the day, it'd just be giving more publicity to two middle
aged has beens who want to get their television show noticed)
Right, that's me nearly done for another week. Next week, a short review
of the Jerry Lawler book and whatever else takes my fancy. If you want
to find out more about what is possibly the world's worst
football/soccer team in the English Premiership, visit
Last week's lyric was from Saliva's "Superstar II" (from the "Back Into
Your System") album. Don't e-mail me the answers - I'll print them in
next week's column. This week's lyric is fairly more obscure (in the UK
charts anyway.): "I still can't keep the day from ending, no more messed
up reasons for me to stay."
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