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RE: [ticket2write] Re: A real synopsis - request for feedback (Jay 40009)

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  • Jay Doggett
    Wings, Thank you very much for your feedback. The synopses I looked at are at this website: http://www.charlottedillon.com/SynopsisSamples.html They seemed
    Message 1 of 8 , Oct 13, 2010
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      Wings,
       
          Thank you very much for your feedback. The synopses I looked at are at this website: http://www.charlottedillon.com/SynopsisSamples.html
       
          They seemed pretty long to me also. I plan to revise mine over the weekend.
       
      Jay
       
      -----Original Message-----
      From: ticket2write@yahoogroups.com [mailto:ticket2write@yahoogroups.com]On Behalf Of Wings081
      Sent: Tuesday, October 12, 2010 6:46 PM
      To: ticket2write@yahoogroups.com
      Subject: [ticket2write] Re: A real synopsis - request for feedback (Jay 40009)

       

      Hi Jay
      I found this a little long for a synopsis.It was almost a rather long prologue and you gave too much away.Best to keep them guessing until they grab the bait and ask you to enlarge.

      Allow me to copy a synopsis type of blurb from the cover of
      Royal Flash by G M Fraser:

      "Flashman, the arch cad and toady, matches his wits, his talents for deceits and malice and above all his speed in evasion against the most brilliant European statesmen and against the most beautiful and unscrupulous adventuress of the era.
      From London gaming halls and English hunting fields to European dungeons and throne rooms, he is involved in a desperate succession of escapes, disguises, amours, and when he can't avoid them, hand to hand combats while the destiny of a continent rests on his broad and failing shoulders. Courtesans and prize-fighters,assassins and duellists, crowned heads and chambermaids crowd the pages of these memoirs."

      A good effort on your part Jay but I believe it would benefit from a
      a little pruning.If an agent or publisher likes your initial intro, they will ask for a sample chapter or two.
      I wish you the best of luck
      As always

      Wings

    • albiaicehouse
      Jay, Sorry for the late reply. Both approaches are useful. The tease is great for a cover letter to draw an agent or editor to want to read more. The editor
      Message 2 of 8 , Nov 7, 2010
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        Jay,

        Sorry for the late reply.

        Both approaches are useful.

        The tease is great for a cover letter to draw an agent or editor to want to read more. The editor might even use the hook in the inside front cover of the book jacket.

        The synopsis really does summarize the entire story. Yours seems to leave out the ending.

        You can tighten the synopsis by removing every redundancy and taking out anything not essential to the plot.

        An agent or editor will usually read your letter first. If she is hooked, she will read a sample chapter to see if you can write, to find any weaknesses which will take too long to change in your style, and to discover if you have a unique voice which may cause readers to flock to your book.

        Last she will read your synopsis to see if you can think through a large project and if you can arrange a book length piece which will keep the reader glued from cover to cover.

        I hope I've helped.

        Good luck!

        Rod

        --- In ticket2write@yahoogroups.com, "Jay Doggett" <jmdoggett@...> wrote:
        >
        > Wings,
        >
        > Thank you very much for your feedback. The synopses I looked at are at
        > this website: http://www.charlottedillon.com/SynopsisSamples.html
        >
        > They seemed pretty long to me also. I plan to revise mine over the
        > weekend.
        >
        > Jay
        >
        > -----Original Message-----
        > From: ticket2write@yahoogroups.com [mailto:ticket2write@yahoogroups.com]On
        > Behalf Of Wings081
        > Sent: Tuesday, October 12, 2010 6:46 PM
        > To: ticket2write@yahoogroups.com
        > Subject: [ticket2write] Re: A real synopsis - request for feedback (Jay
        > 40009)
        >
        >
        >
        > Hi Jay
        > I found this a little long for a synopsis.It was almost a rather long
        > prologue and you gave too much away.Best to keep them guessing until they
        > grab the bait and ask you to enlarge.
        >
        > Allow me to copy a synopsis type of blurb from the cover of
        > Royal Flash by G M Fraser:
        >
        > "Flashman, the arch cad and toady, matches his wits, his talents for
        > deceits and malice and above all his speed in evasion against the most
        > brilliant European statesmen and against the most beautiful and unscrupulous
        > adventuress of the era.
        > From London gaming halls and English hunting fields to European dungeons
        > and throne rooms, he is involved in a desperate succession of escapes,
        > disguises, amours, and when he can't avoid them, hand to hand combats while
        > the destiny of a continent rests on his broad and failing shoulders.
        > Courtesans and prize-fighters,assassins and duellists, crowned heads and
        > chambermaids crowd the pages of these memoirs."
        >
        > A good effort on your part Jay but I believe it would benefit from a
        > a little pruning.If an agent or publisher likes your initial intro, they
        > will ask for a sample chapter or two.
        > I wish you the best of luck
        > As always
        >
        > Wings
        >
      • Jay Doggett
        Rod, Thank you for the help! I ve been researching this and found what you sent is correct. Now I m rewiting what I posted somewhat. Yes, I didn t give all the
        Message 3 of 8 , Nov 9, 2010
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          Rod,
           
              Thank you for the help! I've been researching this and found what you sent is correct. Now I'm rewiting what I posted somewhat. Yes, I didn't give all the details of the ending. The new version will need to have that.
           
          Jay
           
          -----Original Message-----
          From: ticket2write@yahoogroups.com [mailto:ticket2write@yahoogroups.com]On Behalf Of albiaicehouse
          Sent: Sunday, November 07, 2010 7:49 AM
          To: ticket2write@yahoogroups.com
          Subject: [ticket2write] Re: A real synopsis - request for feedback (Jay 40009)

           

          Jay,

          Sorry for the late reply.

          Both approaches are useful.

          The tease is great for a cover letter to draw an agent or editor to want to read more. The editor might even use the hook in the inside front cover of the book jacket.

          The synopsis really does summarize the entire story. Yours seems to leave out the ending.

          You can tighten the synopsis by removing every redundancy and taking out anything not essential to the plot.

          An agent or editor will usually read your letter first. If she is hooked, she will read a sample chapter to see if you can write, to find any weaknesses which will take too long to change in your style, and to discover if you have a unique voice which may cause readers to flock to your book.

          Last she will read your synopsis to see if you can think through a large project and if you can arrange a book length piece which will keep the reader glued from cover to cover.

          I hope I've helped.

          Good luck!

          Rod

          --- In ticket2write@yahoogroups.com, "Jay Doggett" <jmdoggett@...> wrote:
          >
          > Wings,
          >
          > Thank you very much for your feedback. The synopses I looked at are at
          > this website: http://www.charlottedillon.com/SynopsisSamples.html
          >
          > They seemed pretty long to me also. I plan to revise mine over the
          > weekend.
          >
          > Jay
          >
          > -----Original Message-----
          > From: ticket2write@yahoogroups.com [mailto:ticket2write@yahoogroups.com]On
          > Behalf Of Wings081
          > Sent: Tuesday, October 12, 2010 6:46 PM
          > To: ticket2write@yahoogroups.com
          > Subject: [ticket2write] Re: A real synopsis - request for feedback (Jay
          > 40009)
          >
          >
          >
          > Hi Jay
          > I found this a little long for a synopsis.It was almost a rather long
          > prologue and you gave too much away.Best to keep them guessing until they
          > grab the bait and ask you to enlarge.
          >
          > Allow me to copy a synopsis type of blurb from the cover of
          > Royal Flash by G M Fraser:
          >
          > "Flashman, the arch cad and toady, matches his wits, his talents for
          > deceits and malice and above all his speed in evasion against the most
          > brilliant European statesmen and against the most beautiful and unscrupulous
          > adventuress of the era.
          > From London gaming halls and English hunting fields to European dungeons
          > and throne rooms, he is involved in a desperate succession of escapes,
          > disguises, amours, and when he can't avoid them, hand to hand combats while
          > the destiny of a continent rests on his broad and failing shoulders.
          > Courtesans and prize-fighters,assassins and duellists, crowned heads and
          > chambermaids crowd the pages of these memoirs."
          >
          > A good effort on your part Jay but I believe it would benefit from a
          > a little pruning.If an agent or publisher likes your initial intro, they
          > will ask for a sample chapter or two.
          > I wish you the best of luck
          > As always
          >
          > Wings
          >

        • Jay Doggett
          Hi all, I took all the feedback (from the list and outside) and after considerable research rewrote my synopsis until I pounded it into acceptable form. Today
          Message 4 of 8 , Nov 12, 2010
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            Hi all,
             
                I took all the feedback (from the list and outside) and after considerable research rewrote my synopsis until I pounded it into acceptable form. Today I submitted it to some agents. Now the nailbiting begins.
            This is the best recipe for a synopsis I found, although a search of the web using yahoo turned up a number of examples.
             
             
            Thanks again. Wings, while I don't give away the store, the reader will get the gist of the story and the plot. Rod, I did include the ending. If you'd like and it's permitted I can post the update.
             
            Jay
             
            -----Original Message-----
            From: ticket2write@yahoogroups.com [mailto:ticket2write@yahoogroups.com]On Behalf Of albiaicehouse
            Sent: Sunday, November 07, 2010 7:49 AM
            To: ticket2write@yahoogroups.com
            Subject: [ticket2write] Re: A real synopsis - request for feedback (Jay 40009)

             

            Jay,

            Sorry for the late reply.

            Both approaches are useful.

            The tease is great for a cover letter to draw an agent or editor to want to read more. The editor might even use the hook in the inside front cover of the book jacket.

            The synopsis really does summarize the entire story. Yours seems to leave out the ending.

            You can tighten the synopsis by removing every redundancy and taking out anything not essential to the plot.

            An agent or editor will usually read your letter first. If she is hooked, she will read a sample chapter to see if you can write, to find any weaknesses which will take too long to change in your style, and to discover if you have a unique voice which may cause readers to flock to your book.

            Last she will read your synopsis to see if you can think through a large project and if you can arrange a book length piece which will keep the reader glued from cover to cover.

            I hope I've helped.

            Good luck!

            Rod

            --- In ticket2write@yahoogroups.com, "Jay Doggett" <jmdoggett@...> wrote:
            >
            > Wings,
            >
            > Thank you very much for your feedback. The synopses I looked at are at
            > this website: http://www.charlottedillon.com/SynopsisSamples.html
            >
            > They seemed pretty long to me also. I plan to revise mine over the
            > weekend.
            >
            > Jay
            >
            > -----Original Message-----
            > From: ticket2write@yahoogroups.com [mailto:ticket2write@yahoogroups.com]On
            > Behalf Of Wings081
            > Sent: Tuesday, October 12, 2010 6:46 PM
            > To: ticket2write@yahoogroups.com
            > Subject: [ticket2write] Re: A real synopsis - request for feedback (Jay
            > 40009)
            >
            >
            >
            > Hi Jay
            > I found this a little long for a synopsis.It was almost a rather long
            > prologue and you gave too much away.Best to keep them guessing until they
            > grab the bait and ask you to enlarge.
            >
            > Allow me to copy a synopsis type of blurb from the cover of
            > Royal Flash by G M Fraser:
            >
            > "Flashman, the arch cad and toady, matches his wits, his talents for
            > deceits and malice and above all his speed in evasion against the most
            > brilliant European statesmen and against the most beautiful and unscrupulous
            > adventuress of the era.
            > From London gaming halls and English hunting fields to European dungeons
            > and throne rooms, he is involved in a desperate succession of escapes,
            > disguises, amours, and when he can't avoid them, hand to hand combats while
            > the destiny of a continent rests on his broad and failing shoulders.
            > Courtesans and prize-fighters,assassins and duellists, crowned heads and
            > chambermaids crowd the pages of these memoirs."
            >
            > A good effort on your part Jay but I believe it would benefit from a
            > a little pruning.If an agent or publisher likes your initial intro, they
            > will ask for a sample chapter or two.
            > I wish you the best of luck
            > As always
            >
            > Wings
            >

          • albiaicehouse
            Jay, You are welcome and thank you for chasing down such a good link. I leave to management the matter of your request to post. Good luck with the agents. Rod
            Message 5 of 8 , Nov 14, 2010
            • 0 Attachment
              Jay,

              You are welcome and thank you for chasing down such a good link.

              I leave to management the matter of your request to post.

              Good luck with the agents.

              Rod
              aka albi

              --- In ticket2write@yahoogroups.com, "Jay Doggett" <jmdoggett@...> wrote:
              >
              > Hi all,
              >
              > I took all the feedback (from the list and outside) and after
              > considerable research rewrote my synopsis until I pounded it into acceptable
              > form. Today I submitted it to some agents. Now the nailbiting begins.
              > This is the best recipe for a synopsis I found, although a search of the web
              > using yahoo turned up a number of examples.
              >
              > http://www.fmwriters.com/Visionback/Issue%2015/workshop.htm
              >
              > Thanks again. Wings, while I don't give away the store, the reader will get
              > the gist of the story and the plot. Rod, I did include the ending. If you'd
              > like and it's permitted I can post the update.
              >
              > Jay
              >
              > -----Original Message-----
              > From: ticket2write@yahoogroups.com [mailto:ticket2write@yahoogroups.com]On
              > Behalf Of albiaicehouse
              > Sent: Sunday, November 07, 2010 7:49 AM
              > To: ticket2write@yahoogroups.com
              > Subject: [ticket2write] Re: A real synopsis - request for feedback (Jay
              > 40009)
              >
              >
              >
              > Jay,
              >
              > Sorry for the late reply.
              >
              > Both approaches are useful.
              >
              > The tease is great for a cover letter to draw an agent or editor to want
              > to read more. The editor might even use the hook in the inside front cover
              > of the book jacket.
              >
              > The synopsis really does summarize the entire story. Yours seems to leave
              > out the ending.
              >
              > You can tighten the synopsis by removing every redundancy and taking out
              > anything not essential to the plot.
              >
              > An agent or editor will usually read your letter first. If she is hooked,
              > she will read a sample chapter to see if you can write, to find any
              > weaknesses which will take too long to change in your style, and to discover
              > if you have a unique voice which may cause readers to flock to your book.
              >
              > Last she will read your synopsis to see if you can think through a large
              > project and if you can arrange a book length piece which will keep the
              > reader glued from cover to cover.
              >
              > I hope I've helped.
              >
              > Good luck!
              >
              > Rod
              >
              > --- In ticket2write@yahoogroups.com, "Jay Doggett" <jmdoggett@> wrote:
              > >
              > > Wings,
              > >
              > > Thank you very much for your feedback. The synopses I looked at are at
              > > this website: http://www.charlottedillon.com/SynopsisSamples.html
              > >
              > > They seemed pretty long to me also. I plan to revise mine over the
              > > weekend.
              > >
              > > Jay
              > >
              > > -----Original Message-----
              > > From: ticket2write@yahoogroups.com
              > [mailto:ticket2write@yahoogroups.com]On
              > > Behalf Of Wings081
              > > Sent: Tuesday, October 12, 2010 6:46 PM
              > > To: ticket2write@yahoogroups.com
              > > Subject: [ticket2write] Re: A real synopsis - request for feedback (Jay
              > > 40009)
              > >
              > >
              > >
              > > Hi Jay
              > > I found this a little long for a synopsis.It was almost a rather long
              > > prologue and you gave too much away.Best to keep them guessing until
              > they
              > > grab the bait and ask you to enlarge.
              > >
              > > Allow me to copy a synopsis type of blurb from the cover of
              > > Royal Flash by G M Fraser:
              > >
              > > "Flashman, the arch cad and toady, matches his wits, his talents for
              > > deceits and malice and above all his speed in evasion against the most
              > > brilliant European statesmen and against the most beautiful and
              > unscrupulous
              > > adventuress of the era.
              > > From London gaming halls and English hunting fields to European dungeons
              > > and throne rooms, he is involved in a desperate succession of escapes,
              > > disguises, amours, and when he can't avoid them, hand to hand combats
              > while
              > > the destiny of a continent rests on his broad and failing shoulders.
              > > Courtesans and prize-fighters,assassins and duellists, crowned heads and
              > > chambermaids crowd the pages of these memoirs."
              > >
              > > A good effort on your part Jay but I believe it would benefit from a
              > > a little pruning.If an agent or publisher likes your initial intro, they
              > > will ask for a sample chapter or two.
              > > I wish you the best of luck
              > > As always
              > >
              > > Wings
              > >
              >
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