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Limericks

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  • Ted Nicholas
    My poetry is raw from the sticks And rhyming I usually don t mix I m up for new things and the pleasure it brings So these are my first limericks Last night I
    Message 1 of 9 , Apr 1, 2003
      My poetry is raw from the sticks
      And rhyming I usually don't mix
      I'm up for new things
      and the pleasure it brings
      So these are my first limericks

      Last night I played music with the guys
      We sang our hearts out to the skies
      We raised up our beer
      and sang out good cheer
      This morning the reds in my eyes

      I'm leaving the mountains and highlands
      Moving truck crossing the bylands
      With just wife and the cat
      We'll be living lands flat
      And singing the songs of the islands

      On a small island, soon we will be
      The ski resorts we will soon flee
      To roam beaches and sand
      with sunscreen in hand
      We're swapping our mountains for sea

      It's brother Bob I'll miss the most
      Together we'd laugh and boast
      On computers we'd play
      And music till late day
      His wife is a most patient host

      From Beaver Island I'll be posting my rap
      In the lake breeze our beach towels will flap
      With naught but the shore
      Life won't be a bore
      The local pub has Guiness on tap
      :-)



      --
      Ted Nicholas
      Email: nicholas@...
    • Susan Donahue
      Well done, Ted...and just in time for April Fool s Day! These are great fun. Suzianne
      Message 2 of 9 , Apr 1, 2003
        Well done, Ted...and just in time for April Fool's Day! These are
        great fun.

        Suzianne

        --- In ticket2write@yahoogroups.com, Ted Nicholas
        <nicholas@c...> wrote:
        > My poetry is raw from the sticks
        > And rhyming I usually don't mix
        > I'm up for new things
        > and the pleasure it brings
        > So these are my first limericks
        >
        > Last night I played music with the guys
        > We sang our hearts out to the skies
        > We raised up our beer
        > and sang out good cheer
        > This morning the reds in my eyes
        >
        > I'm leaving the mountains and highlands
        > Moving truck crossing the bylands
        > With just wife and the cat
        > We'll be living lands flat
        > And singing the songs of the islands
        >
        > On a small island, soon we will be
        > The ski resorts we will soon flee
        > To roam beaches and sand
        > with sunscreen in hand
        > We're swapping our mountains for sea
        >
        > It's brother Bob I'll miss the most
        > Together we'd laugh and boast
        > On computers we'd play
        > And music till late day
        > His wife is a most patient host
        >
        > From Beaver Island I'll be posting my rap
        > In the lake breeze our beach towels will flap
        > With naught but the shore
        > Life won't be a bore
        > The local pub has Guiness on tap
        > :-)
        >
        >
        >
        > --
        > Ted Nicholas
        > Email: nicholas@c...
      • wings081
        Hi Ted Many people tend to put down limericks as trivia undeserving of publication and yet limericks are the ideal springboard for those unfortunate writers
        Message 3 of 9 , Apr 1, 2003
          Hi Ted
          Many people tend to put down limericks as trivia undeserving of
          publication and yet limericks are the ideal springboard for those
          unfortunate writers who suffer occasionally from the dreaded
          disease `writers block'. Whatever that is when it's at
          home. (I have prophylactic immuntity to the that literary omplaint)

          Take any situation, profession, place, name or even a single word,
          allow yourself a little licence and a touch of levity and no matter
          how ridiculous the result, you are writing.
          You are using your imagination and with a simple five line rhyme you
          may be raising a smile on the reader's face.

          Take names for example:

          There was a young lady named Jane
          Who liked a kiss now and again
          By now and again
          She was quick to explain
          She meant Now and Again and Again!

          Or taking a step further, yet still within bounds:

          There was a young lady name Joan
          Who went to the dentist alone
          In a state of depravity
          He filled the wrong cavity
          Now she's nursing her filling at home


          Looking forward to reading samples from other members

          As always

          Wings
        • Melmiriel
          Let s not forget that Limericks were initiated mainly by Edward Lear ! And are some sort of satirism towards society ! LIMERICK:LIM-ER-RICK ~~~~~~~~ 1)County
          Message 4 of 9 , Apr 1, 2003
            Let's not forget that Limericks were initiated mainly by Edward Lear !
            And are some sort of satirism towards society !
             
            LIMERICK:LIM-ER-RICK
            ~~~~~~~~
            1)County in S.W Ireland, in MUNSTER
            Province...
            2)Irish refrain containing PROBABLY
            the name "LIMERICK".
            Consequently: a nonsense poem of five
            anapestic lines, now often BAWDY,
            usually with the rime scheme AABBA,
            the first, second and fifth lines having
            THREE STRESSES; the third and fourth,
            ONLY TWO.
             
            There was a young lady named Harris
               Whom nothing could ever embarrass
               Till the bath salts one day
               In the tub where she lay
               Turned out to be plaster of Paris.
             
             There was a young bishop from Brest
                  Who openly practised incest.
                     "My sisters and nieces
                      Are all dandy pieces
            And they don't cost a cent" he confessed
             
               When Daddy and Mummy got plastered
              And their shame had been thoroughly
                            mattered,
                   They told their boy Harry,
                   "Son, we never did marry.
               But don't tell the neighbours, you
                            bastard"
                                                     
                The limerick is furtive and mean
              You must keep her in close quarantine
                   Or she sneaks to the slums
                      and promptly becomes
                 Discorderly drunk and obscene.

               The limerick is callous and crude
                 Its morals distressingly lewd
                   It's not worth the reading
                     By persons of breeding
             It's designed for the vulgar and rude.
             
            (Edward Lear)
             
            Be seeing you !
             
            Catherine.
            <3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3
            <3      melly@...  (Yahoo Messenger & MSN)
            <3      catherine.escarras@...
            <3      http://perso.club-internet.fr/melly       
            <3      http://forum.faerylands.net
            <3
            <3      Mon site réservé à la poésie des autres:
            <3      http://membres.lycos.fr/poesie2000/
            <3      MES LISTES :
            <3      http://fr.groups.yahoo.com/group/POESIE_2000
            <3      http://fr.groups.yahoo.com/group/des_lyres_et_des_maux    
            <3      http://fr.groups.yahoo.com/group/Faeryland 
            <3      http://fr.groups.yahoo.com/group/MONDES_INEXPLIQUES  
            <3      http://fr.groups.yahoo.com/group/Imladris/
            <3
            <3      Membre du "CERCLE DES POETES" et du
            <3      "CERCLE LITTERAIRE" :     
            <3       http://www.anarchistecouronne.com/cercles.htm    
            <3
            ----- Original Message -----
            From: wings081
            Sent: Tuesday, April 01, 2003 11:54 PM
            Subject: [ticket2write] Re: Limericks

            Hi Ted
            Many people tend to put down limericks as trivia undeserving of
            publication and yet limericks are the ideal springboard for those
            unfortunate writers who suffer occasionally from the dreaded
            disease `writers block'. Whatever that is when it's at
            home. (I have prophylactic immuntity to the that literary omplaint)

            Take any situation, profession, place, name or even a single word,
            allow yourself a little licence and a touch of levity and no matter
            how ridiculous the result, you are writing.
            You are using your imagination and with a simple five line rhyme you
            may be raising a smile on the reader's face.

            Take names for example:

            There was a young lady named Jane
            Who liked a kiss now and again
            By now and again
            She was quick to explain
            She meant Now and Again and Again!

            Or taking a step further, yet still within  bounds:

            There was a young lady name Joan
            Who went to the dentist alone
            In a state of depravity
            He filled the wrong cavity
            Now she's nursing her filling at home


            Looking forward to reading samples from other members

            As always

            Wings






          • Shawn Novak
            Catherine, Not to be outdone, I will offer this one There once was woman from Spain, who liked to dance nude in the rain. Although some may have scoffed,
            Message 5 of 9 , Apr 1, 2003
              Catherine, Not to be outdone, I will offer this one"

              There once was woman from Spain,
              who liked to dance nude in the rain.
              Although some may have scoffed,
              chattered and skwaked,
              nobody ever complained.



              --- In ticket2write@yahoogroups.com, "Melmiriel"
              <catherine.escarras@w...> wrote:
              > Let's not forget that Limericks were initiated mainly by Edward
              Lear !
              > And are some sort of satirism towards society !
              >
              > LIMERICK:LIM-ER-RICK
              > ~~~~~~~~
              > 1)County in S.W Ireland, in MUNSTER
              > Province...
              > 2)Irish refrain containing PROBABLY
              > the name "LIMERICK".
              > Consequently: a nonsense poem of five
              > anapestic lines, now often BAWDY,
              > usually with the rime scheme AABBA,
              > the first, second and fifth lines having
              > THREE STRESSES; the third and fourth,
              > ONLY TWO.
              >
              > There was a young lady named Harris
              > Whom nothing could ever embarrass
              > Till the bath salts one day
              > In the tub where she lay
              > Turned out to be plaster of Paris.
              >
              > There was a young bishop from Brest
              > Who openly practised incest.
              > "My sisters and nieces
              > Are all dandy pieces
              > And they don't cost a cent" he confessed
              >
              > When Daddy and Mummy got plastered
              > And their shame had been thoroughly
              > mattered,
              > They told their boy Harry,
              > "Son, we never did marry.
              > But don't tell the neighbours, you
              > bastard"
              >
              > The limerick is furtive and mean
              > You must keep her in close quarantine
              > Or she sneaks to the slums
              > and promptly becomes
              > Discorderly drunk and obscene.
              >
              > The limerick is callous and crude
              > Its morals distressingly lewd
              > It's not worth the reading
              > By persons of breeding
              > It's designed for the vulgar and rude.
              >
              > (Edward Lear)
              >
              > Be seeing you !
              >
              > Catherine.
              >
              <3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3
              <3<3<3<3<3
              > <3 melly@c... (Yahoo Messenger & MSN)
              > <3 catherine.escarras@w...
              > <3 http://perso.club-internet.fr/melly
              > <3 http://forum.faerylands.net
              > <3
              > <3 Mon site réservé à la poésie des autres:
              > <3 http://membres.lycos.fr/poesie2000/
              > <3 MES LISTES :
              > <3 http://fr.groups.yahoo.com/group/POESIE_2000
              > <3
              http://fr.groups.yahoo.com/group/des_lyres_et_des_maux
              > <3 http://fr.groups.yahoo.com/group/Faeryland
              > <3
              http://fr.groups.yahoo.com/group/MONDES_INEXPLIQUES
              > <3 http://fr.groups.yahoo.com/group/Imladris/
              > <3
              > <3 Membre du "CERCLE DES POETES" et du
              > <3 "CERCLE LITTERAIRE" :
              > <3 http://www.anarchistecouronne.com/cercles.htm
              > <3
              >
              > ----- Original Message -----
              > From: wings081
              > To: ticket2write@yahoogroups.com
              > Sent: Tuesday, April 01, 2003 11:54 PM
              > Subject: [ticket2write] Re: Limericks
              >
              >
              > Hi Ted
              > Many people tend to put down limericks as trivia undeserving
              of
              > publication and yet limericks are the ideal springboard for
              those
              > unfortunate writers who suffer occasionally from the dreaded
              > disease `writers block'. Whatever that is when it's at
              > home. (I have prophylactic immuntity to the that literary
              omplaint)
              >
              > Take any situation, profession, place, name or even a single
              word,
              > allow yourself a little licence and a touch of levity and no
              matter
              > how ridiculous the result, you are writing.
              > You are using your imagination and with a simple five line
              rhyme you
              > may be raising a smile on the reader's face.
              >
              > Take names for example:
              >
              > There was a young lady named Jane
              > Who liked a kiss now and again
              > By now and again
              > She was quick to explain
              > She meant Now and Again and Again!
              >
              > Or taking a step further, yet still within bounds:
              >
              > There was a young lady name Joan
              > Who went to the dentist alone
              > In a state of depravity
              > He filled the wrong cavity
              > Now she's nursing her filling at home
              >
              >
              > Looking forward to reading samples from other members
              >
              > As always
              >
              > Wings
            • Melmiriel
              Let s contest !;)! The deed is done , so let s assume it ! ;o) There was a handsome man of Cork Who was constantly in deadlock To try and stop it He used a
              Message 6 of 9 , Apr 1, 2003
                Let's contest !;)! "The deed is done", so let's assume it ! ;o)
                 
                There was a handsome man of Cork
                Who was constantly in deadlock
                To try and stop it
                He used a shrewd trick
                But he finally lost his cock !
                 
                Sorry ladies and gentlemen, just a pun !
                 
                There's also that one I learnt in London !
                 
                There was a gentleman of Kent
                Whose thing was incredibly bent
                To save himself the trouble
                He bent it in double
                And instead of coming he went !
                 
                Oops ! :)))))))))))))
                 
                C'mon the others, it's real fun !
                 
                I dare not beat about the bush, or else, I might product something very offensive, let me seeeeeeee eehhhhhhhhh..............here it comes !
                 
                Once a bush said to a magpie
                Stop picking at me in the rye
                The magpie dangled
                The bush tried to disentangle
                And ended up in a sty !
                 
                Beurkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk ! LOL
                Well, I'm quite pleased it's all happening on an "Animal Farm" ! :o)))))))))
                 
                Catherine.
                 
                <3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3
                <3      melly@...  (Yahoo Messenger & MSN)
                <3      catherine.escarras@...
                <3      http://perso.club-internet.fr/melly       
                <3      http://forum.faerylands.net
                <3
                <3      Mon site réservé à la poésie des autres:
                <3      http://membres.lycos.fr/poesie2000/
                <3      MES LISTES :
                <3      http://fr.groups.yahoo.com/group/POESIE_2000
                <3      http://fr.groups.yahoo.com/group/des_lyres_et_des_maux    
                <3      http://fr.groups.yahoo.com/group/Faeryland 
                <3      http://fr.groups.yahoo.com/group/MONDES_INEXPLIQUES  
                <3      http://fr.groups.yahoo.com/group/Imladris/
                <3
                <3      Membre du "CERCLE DES POETES" et du
                <3      "CERCLE LITTERAIRE" :     
                <3       http://www.anarchistecouronne.com/cercles.htm    
                <3
                ----- Original Message -----
                Sent: Wednesday, April 02, 2003 4:30 AM
                Subject: [ticket2write] Re: Limericks

                Catherine, Not to be outdone, I will offer this one"

                There once was  woman from Spain,
                who liked to dance nude in the rain.
                Although some may have scoffed,
                chattered and skwaked,
                nobody ever complained.



                --- In ticket2write@yahoogroups.com, "Melmiriel"
                <catherine.escarras@w...> wrote:
                > Let's not forget that Limericks were initiated mainly by Edward
                Lear !
                > And are some sort of satirism towards society !
                >
                > LIMERICK:LIM-ER-RICK
                > ~~~~~~~~
                > 1)County in S.W Ireland, in MUNSTER
                > Province...
                > 2)Irish refrain containing PROBABLY
                > the name "LIMERICK".
                > Consequently: a nonsense poem of five
                > anapestic lines, now often BAWDY,
                > usually with the rime scheme AABBA,
                > the first, second and fifth lines having
                > THREE STRESSES; the third and fourth,
                > ONLY TWO.
                >
                > There was a young lady named Harris
                >    Whom nothing could ever embarrass
                >    Till the bath salts one day
                >    In the tub where she lay
                >    Turned out to be plaster of Paris.
                >
                >  There was a young bishop from Brest
                >       Who openly practised incest.
                >          "My sisters and nieces
                >           Are all dandy pieces
                > And they don't cost a cent" he confessed
                >
                >    When Daddy and Mummy got plastered
                >   And their shame had been thoroughly
                >                 mattered,
                >        They told their boy Harry,
                >        "Son, we never did marry.
                >    But don't tell the neighbours, you
                >                 bastard"
                >                                         
                >     The limerick is furtive and mean
                >   You must keep her in close quarantine
                >        Or she sneaks to the slums
                >           and promptly becomes
                >      Discorderly drunk and obscene.
                >
                >    The limerick is callous and crude
                >      Its morals distressingly lewd
                >        It's not worth the reading
                >          By persons of breeding
                >  It's designed for the vulgar and rude.
                >
                > (Edward Lear)
                >
                > Be seeing you !
                >
                > Catherine.
              • Charene
                There once was a young girl from Spain Who was very cocky and vain One day her comb broke, She thought she would croke, And now of her mane, she s ashamed.
                Message 7 of 9 , Apr 2, 2003
                  There once was a young girl from Spain
                  Who was very cocky and vain
                  One day her comb broke,
                  She thought she would croke,
                  And now of her mane, she's ashamed.
                   
                • Ted Nicholas
                  Posted with admiration. :-) There once was a writer called wings Who posted many wonderful things Of Limericks he d say They re the poem of the day Relating of
                  Message 8 of 9 , Apr 3, 2003
                    Posted with admiration. :-)

                    There once was a writer called wings
                    Who posted many wonderful things
                    Of Limericks he'd say
                    They're the poem of the day
                    Relating of yesterday's flings

                    There once was an artist named Ted
                    Who thought he could write instead
                    He thought long and hard
                    Trying to think like a bard
                    Still his artwork supplies all his bread

                    There once was a group that would fight
                    Debate, inspire and insight
                    Of sonnets and poems
                    And story filled tomes
                    For each it's our ticket2write

                    Sorry, couldn't help myself. :-)
                    Ted

                    --
                    Ted Nicholas
                    Email: nicholas@...
                  • wings081
                    Hi Ted. There once was a writer named Ted Quite a witty soul everyone said At the slightest suggestion He d respond without question Keeping ticket2write up
                    Message 9 of 9 , Apr 3, 2003
                      Hi Ted.

                      There once was a writer named Ted
                      Quite a witty soul everyone said
                      At the slightest suggestion
                      He'd respond without question
                      Keeping ticket2write up ahead

                      Best wishes

                      Wings
                      -
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