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9864Re: [The REAL PETA] Letters to God from your DOG

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  • Colleen Klaum
    Nov 1 8:58 PM
      I always thought this was so cute Missy :-)

      *Colleen* (Catwoman)

      parrot004@... wrote:Dear God,

      How come people love to smell flowers, but seldom,
      if ever, smell one another? Where are their priorities?

      Dear God,
      When we get to Heaven, can we sit on your couch?
      Or is it the same old story?

      Dear God,
      Excuse me, but why are there cars named after the jaguar,
      the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the
      rabbit, but not one named for a dog? How often do you
      see a cougar riding around? We dogs love a nice ride! I
      know every breed can't have its own model, but it would
      be easy to rename the Chrysler Eagle the Chrysler Beagle!

      Dear God,
      If a dog barks his head off in the forest and no human
      hears him, does he still get his rear end whacked with a newspaper?

      Dear God,
      Is it true that in Heaven, dining room tables have on-ramps?

      Dear God,
      If we come back as humans, is that good, or bad?

      Dear God,
      More meatballs, less spaghetti.

      Dear God,
      When we get to the Pearly Gates, do we have to do that
      stupid shake hands trick to get in?

      Dear God,
      We dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand
      signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent IDs,
      electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths.
      What do humans understand?

      Dear God,
      Are there dogs on other planets or are we alone? I have
      been howling at the moon and stars for a long time, but all
      I ever hear back is the horny beagle across the street.

      Dear God,
      Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to
      apologize to them?

      Dear God,
      Is it true that dogs are not allowed in restaurants
      because we can't make up our minds what NOT to order?
      Or is it the accident on the carpet thing, again?

      Dear God,
      May I have my balls back?

      [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]

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      "Live in peace with the animals. Animals bring love to our hearts, and warmth to our souls."

      Colleen Klaum

      "He who is cruel to animals becomes hard also in his dealings with men. We can judge the heart of a man by his treatment of animals." Immanuel Kant

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