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15Dear Mysterytrain (Re: New member, etc.)

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  • mattdog_ec
    Aug 10, 2001
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      Dear Mysterytrain,<br>Are you a professor of
      English? Thank you for the compliments about my writing.
      Certainly your prose is nifty, too!<br><br>Anyhoo, I
      realize now (with your help and that of The Mack) the
      confusion my post probably generated. I came to this club
      from a link from another club called
      "GuysWhoHaveLosttoGirls" (or something like that) and apparently I still
      had the intergender combat focus in mind. For that, I
      apologize. It wasn't too cool of me to introduce that issue
      here.<br><br>Nevertheless, since you asked, I hope it is OK if I do attempt
      to clarify myself. Some of the ambiguity probably
      stems from my not having fully articulated my feelings
      for myself. Trying to write this response has forced
      me to think things out more fully!<br><br>To answer
      one of your questions, I have indeed participated in
      various sports against men much more than against women.
      I was focusing on the intergender thing because
      that was what was on my brain. That is not to say,
      though, that there isn't some sort of unique thrill in
      competing with/against a woman. Perhaps it has something to
      do with my fascination with gender roles and,
      specifically, women who defy them. Strong, independent,
      assertive women (regardless of their athletic prowess) go
      against the grain of "traditional" expectations in our
      culture...and that's so cool!<br><br>I have always enjoyed
      wrestling, whether with my brother when growing up or on the
      high school wrestling team. (I was a mediocre high
      school wrestler at best, by the way.) The chance to test
      myself physically is always invigorating. Would this
      competition be different with a woman? Yes, I think so...men
      often get unhealthily competitive: they focus more on
      the other person's losing than on their own success.
      Women often (not always) seem to be better able to
      strive to do their best, trying their hardest to win,
      without being tempted to short-circuit the process, or to
      completely lose their temper if they lose. (I hate to use
      generalizations, and I recognize that these stereotypes don't
      always hold.) Then again, maybe I just like the idea of
      wrestling women because (in general) I find women more
      interesting and complex than men. (Perhaps I think I
      understand men because I am one.)<br><br>How can I say it's
      great to lose? Well, it's great to get sweaty and
      tired, to exert myself, to give something my whole
      effort...and if I still lose, I know that I was challenged.
      <br><br>Anyway, I apologize to the Mack for taking up space on
      her board. If anyone would like to continue this
      discussion, feel free to email me at mattdog_ec@.... I
      always enjoy discussing sports, gender roles,
      philosophy, literature...
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