#> One of the astute comments Crowley made about things like
#> this [extraneous effects of ceremonial activities] is that
#> anything that happens as a result of ritual that isn't
#> intentional involves "leakage."
compare heat produced by light bulbs or light produced by
a fire constructed for warmth. the energy used to produce
the effect is also producing unwanted or unintended
phenomena. sometimes this is an indicator of our lack
of control of the technology so engaged and therefore
acceptable to the final outcome, and sometimes it is
an awkwardness which is too problematic to sustain.
# Hmm. And it occurs to me that I do work quite unguardedly
# with these people -- for all the lip service paid in
# Wiccan circles to 'perfect love and perfect trust,'
it is an aim, a standard of targetting, rather than
merely lip service.
# it was in those circles that I learned not to let my
# shields down completely, as it were.
you learned some of the problems of not achieving
that standard of 'perfect love and perfect trust'.
# A few bad 'ritual hangovers' disabused me of that
# idea quick enough.
sounds like you had unrealistic expectations.
# I took the better part of a year attending open
# ceremonies with this lodge, deciding whether we
# were a good fit for each other, before making
# any commitment to it; thus my working 'open' now.
# Energy-wise, this is probably like making the
# transition from the kiddie pool to the open surf,
# so maybe I shouldn't be surprised!
that's a great description and comparison! and no,
i don't think you should be surprised. unrealistic
expectations about basic working groups whose
ideals surpass their achievement (as compared with
some kind of 'adepti panel' or 'expert working
group' where all participants are familiar with
skilled adaptation to different energy-working
characters) predisposes toward disappointment.
#> You say you're a sensitive person, which is
#> marvelous, but in this case, it is obviously
#> inconvenient for you. ...reduce your sensitivity.
that's one way to approach the problem. the other
is to be more picky about working groups and their
level of expertise.
#> The pragmatic answer is to gradually expose
#> yourself to hexagrams until you learn the
#> trick of not letting them fuck with your
yes, that skill may be learned within more
than one context: 1) within trial and error,
experimental learning groups, or 2) within
a high-level training context wherein the
participants adjust also to all their modes.
the former may take longer, be less rigorous,
and require transition to multiple contexts.
the latter may be more direct, develop the
defensive skills necessary while making more
plain why it is that this becomes a problem
for people (for whom and why).
# A hexagram a day keeps the doctor away, or
# something like that. I imagine that's not
# only pragmatic but the most sensible course.
one might also say 'practice makes perfect'
here, on the order of meditating in a busy
downtown intersection. it compares to a kind
of trial by fire or challenged learning
environment, as compared with a quiet byway
where the master of meditation provides more
helpful pointers on basic skills of focus
prior to engaging all of those complications.
#> Personally, I would avoid taking any
#> initiations until you have this sussed.
depending on the interest in ordeal, yes.
#> If hexagrams knock you out, who knows how
#> you would respond to an initiation like
#> the I? of the O.T.O., where people make
#> much more grandiose magical gestures that
#> you've never had to deal with before.
it may not be the best idea to compare ordeals
of initiation to potentially compatible rite
activities which are merely inexpertly arrayed
or choreographed amongst participants.
# Yes, I'd like to feel like I know I will
# stay vertical long enough to actually
# hear what the vow I'm supposed to be
# taking is... :-p
that is likely to at least require exposure
to rites of unexpected form and content. it
is one advantage to the solitary shaman's
serendipitous excursion into nonordinary
states in preparation for ceremonial or