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Screenplay continues

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  • phuston@capital.net
    Scene Four -- And please remember this is just a rough draft -- The group, Mr A, Mr B-the Pe Choi, Mr YK and Mr N, along with a few nameless guards that may be
    Message 1 of 57 , Aug 1, 2005
      Scene Four --

      And please remember this is just a rough draft --

      The group, Mr A, Mr B-the Pe Choi, Mr YK and Mr N, along with a few nameless
      guards that may be human, shen or a mixture of the two races (although I think
      I'm leaning towards making them shen just to spice things up a bit) arrives at
      a visually stunning monastery/ high temple in the desolate mountains or desert.


      (Purists will flinch but I have no idea where in the Empire any of this is
      actually happening. It is probably not important to the film anyway, to
      identify the province.)

      They are met at the doors and when the elaborately dressed temple guards see
      their credentials, they are, with great cries of shock and awe, immediately
      ushered in to a large room where they are invited to dine with some high priests
      who are dressed similiarly to the previous high priest (so we know they are all
      important and all on the same affiliated group.)

      Credentials? I forgot to mention credentials in scene three. The high priest in
      scene three gave them interesting looking credentials of some kind. -- a
      scroll, perhaps a high tech map stone, a jeweled temple pin, perhaps a little
      video player holograph machine (Save me Obi Wan Kenobi. Save me. You're our
      only hope!) --anyway something no low level priest would ever have or even
      consider stealing unless he were totally nuts. Perhaps it's a device that
      telepathically links someone or something back to the priest at the dig. I
      don't really know right now.

      Now I don't have my source book so actually I forget if a lower clan/ prestige
      person would ever actually be invited to sit and dine with a higher prestige
      person. I doubt it. Therefore if this is the case the characters must sit or
      kneel or even stand on a lower level of the terraced floor in the room while
      the priests eat. The fact that the priests are being interrupted in their
      dining serves to reinforce just what an urgent matter this is.

      Anyway, the priests naturally become quite excited when they see the key.

      "Well," they say "you must go to Bey Ssu and visit the high temple library."

      "But why us?'

      "Because you came this far and there's no one else." (Perhaps it's explained
      that one of the group is a powerful anti-psychic who has accidentally served to
      screen clairvoyants from viewing the key. Perhaps not.)

      "But we are hardly equipped for this."

      "Of course not, but with the proper assistance from our temple resources and
      armory you will be."

      The next of the scene continues as the group is led off to see both the armorer
      (who shall not be named "M") and the area where they pick up a magic using
      priest and his assistants. The priest will be used to explain that magic works
      in this world, how it works and why (the skin of the new reality, etc., is
      thinner -- of course to him this is just one theory and it's a bit
      non-canonical but at some point early in the film while walking down a road or
      something he will offer several theories on how magic works, two of which are
      quite silly and one of which is dead on correct so the audience will understand
      this.)

      Perhaps we should do the being equipped as a montage thing --perhaps not.

      So when the group is all ready and geared to go then we can send them off to Bey
      Ssu.

      We are now quite near the end of Act One actually -- just a little bit to go.

      Films normally are considered to have three acts.

      One =the set up

      Two --the middle with all the complications

      Three -- the resolution / climax

      Ciao!

      Peter Huston
    • reliquarian
      ... this is, at ... Sarcasm and I go way back. I`m afraid it has influenced my manner of formulation. What I meant to say, succinctly, is that it`s not only a
      Message 57 of 57 , Aug 8, 2005
        --- In tekumel@yahoogroups.com, phuston@c... wrote:

        > I'm not sure if you meant brilliant in a sarcastic way or not, but
        this is, at
        > least, a lucky accident.

        Sarcasm and I go way back. I`m afraid it has influenced my manner of
        formulation. What I meant to say, succinctly, is that it`s not only a
        good opening for `plot', but it`s also a very believable
        mistake on
        the part of a high-priest who`s expertise is archeology, and not
        subterfuge. "Gah! A key! Contemporary responsibility! Away with
        it!"
        Had he been in the temple, one of his peers would immediately have
        come to his assistance, or he would have been flatly overruled by the
        pater superior, but under the circumstances, he`s left to his own
        devices.

        > At some point in the story agents of the temple of Ksárul should
        learn about
        > this discovery and then send out agents and creatures and such to
        chase our
        > heros all around the screen. This would be a good place to do that.
        >

        Some expansion while I`m in the mood (and my vacation lasts):

        One of the visitors my have second thoughts about the course of
        action, but hey, all the diggers have been screened, right? They
        have, sort of (they`ve been recruited from trusted clans and such),
        but then, the `questionable diggers' are not actually part of
        a gang
        of robbers, or Ksárul-worshippers themselves, it`s just that they
        know this guy who happens to be an information-broker. We can
        introduce this character as a proto-antagonist, who sets up the stage
        for the priests of Ksárul. Not only plot-wise, but also
        setting-wise.
        After all, someone dealing in information is in all likelihood a
        worshipper of Ksárul, and more likely to lecture his associates
        about
        the `power of knowledge' than His priests, who I don`t
        envision as
        being that loose-lipped. Mr. X can do most of the
        `explaining' about
        the merits of Ksárul, which tells the audience what makes the
        `masked
        men' tick.
        Of course, at some point his role is to be taken over by Mr. Silver
        Mask (or Mrs. Black Wood Face). Since this is a familiar step-up in
        threat-level to most movie audiences, we can use this moment to
        deepen the setting a bit. Mr. SM (*ahem*, one vote in favour of Mrs
        BWF) might represent the Blue Curtain society, who take over from the
        Society of Blue Light - who sponsored the artifact-robbers - when
        they learn about the true nature of the artifact in question. We
        don`t need much screen time for that: they can simply walk in and
        take over while Mr X is being debrieved at the local temple. The
        factions are simply the backgrounds of the two antagonists, and it
        should make for a good spectacle: white-masked stormtroopers moving
        in and securing the corridor to the debrieving room, then splitting
        up to make way for a masked menace. Here`s another vote for Mrs: the
        black wooden mask will contrast splendidly with the silver mask Mr
        X`s debriever is likely to be wearing. (I`m getting a strong visual
        here: a priestess with a mask that is not polished, but dried out and
        cracked, on the point of giving in to decay, with a voice on par
        (i.e. dried out and cracked), but with the body of Adriana Lima -
        We`ll come up with an excuse to reveal that later on, I trust. I know
        she`s a model, but she only has to walk around with an expression-
        less plank on her face, and Marianne Faithfull can do the voice-
        over.) Mr X, proven to be inefficient at this point, might be
        suitably `dismissed', or - being more of an individualist
        than the
        protagonists - he can make a dash for it. It`s a movie staple to let
        him fall into the hands of the heroes at that point, but that should
        only be used if it furthers plot. I.e. the heroes need some info
        about their opponents, or the plot needs the heroes to leak some
        plans to their opponents, in which case Mr X escapes again. (Slippery
        kind of chap, I`m thinking a kind of Benni from `The Mummy',
        less
        whiny perhaps, but utterly loathsome and ignoble, someone for the
        audience to hate. `Mask', in true Star Wars style would be
        fearsome
        and merciless, but quite capable of shoing `proper'
        behaviour. After
        having obtained the key from the heroes, by whatever means necessary,
        she will simply return them to the nearest temple of Thúmis. What
        happens to them eventually does not concern her.)

        > I think we should however, at some point, have the characters
        discuss why they
        > are following all these orders. (i.e. I want to rise in the temple
        or "I don't
        > want to be impaled.") That way the audience is not wondering about
        why the
        > characters are so obedient. (I mean part of the audience would be
        pop-corn
        > eating American teenagers, right?)

        Good point. Why not throw in an Ahoggya as a `friendly'
        encounter,
        who blatantly questions their loyalty, you know, just to appear
        rude? The heroes can then all give their own interpretation
        of "it`s just something you have to do", which conveys what
        makes
        them tick as individuals, so the audience can choose who to identify
        with. If Mr X is already in their captivity, he could give all
        the `wrong' reasons, like the point about getting staked, as
        a
        contrast.

        Of course, for a really grand finale, the key should eventually fall
        into the hands of the antagonists, right?

        Edwin


        PS. I might have missed a w - [Alt]199[/Alt] - or W - [Alt]87[/Alt] -
        here or there. My keyboard is on partial strike.
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