Mindfulness Everywhere | Jumper | Tips for Happiness | Living Happily Ever After with Your Significant Other | Conventional & Ultimate Truths
Mindfulness, I declare, is helpful everywhere.
All things can be mastered with mindfulness.
- The Buddha
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What If You Were a "Jumper"?
15 Buddhist Tips for Happiness
Answering Dharma Questions
Emptiness as Changing-ness
Orthodox Dharma Practice
Worldly or Spiritual Work?
Follow a Leper's Torch?
Sincerity Over Sarcasm
No Chair-ness in Chair
Brand Buddhism Well
For a Skilful Marriage
Dharma or Teacher?
Faith in Horoscope?
Not Just Say Sorry
Warts & All
Realisation: Living Happily Ever After with Your Significant Other
True love not only sets others free, it sets you free too. - stonepeace
Buddhism is often mistakenly dismissed as a "cold" philosophy, which encourages monasticism, while renouncing any romantic notions, even for householders. This is however not so, for the Buddha clearly knew that it is not easy for most to be ready for a spiritual life that fully relinquishes worldly love. Advising on couplehood, he taught, "If both husband and wife want to see one another not only in the present life, but also in the life to come, they should be in tune [with each other] in conviction [to the Dharma], in tune in virtue [moral discipline], in tune in generosity, and in tune in discernment [wisdom]. Then, they will see one another not only in the present life, but also in the life to come." (AN 4:55, Samajivina Sutta, tr. Thanissaro Bhikkhu)
"When both are faithful and generous, self-restrained, of righteous living, they come together as husband and wife, full of love for each other. Many blessings come their way, they dwell together in happiness. Their enemies are left dejected, when both are equal in virtue. Having lived by Dhamma in this world, the same in virtue and observance, they rejoice after death in the deva-world [or other desired realms], enjoying abundant happiness." (AN 4:55, In the Buddha's Words, p.121-122, ed. Bhikkhu Bodhi)
Living together with the Dharma, a couple creates similar positive karmic affinity, thus deserving continual fulfilment of their happy spiritual friendship, eventually leading to Enlightenment. If, say, the wife is virtuous, while the husband is not, they might not reunite in future lives within the same realm - the extreme being a heavenly rebirth for the first and a hellish one for the latter. While the Buddha praised ideal matrimonial bliss, he also skilfully urged spiritual cultivation - which would gradually lessen worldliness of the relationship. Mutually supportive of each other's spiritual life, Prince Siddhartha himself partnered Princess Yashodhara for some 500 past lives, before becoming the Buddha, thereafter guiding her to be an Arahant! Now, that's romantic! Shen Shi'an
Does your love in Samsara embrace Samsara tighter, or does it loosens its grip? - stonepeace
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Excerpt: The Conventional & Ultimate Truths
The conventional truth and the ultimate truth are interdependent truths. - stonepeace
To understand selflessness, you need to understand that everything that exists is contained in two groups called the two truths: conventional and ultimate. The phenomena that we see and observe around us can go from good to bad, or bad to good, depending on various causes and conditions. Many phenomena cannot be said to be inherently good or bad; they are better or worse, tall or short, beautiful or ugly, only by comparison, not by way of their own nature. Their value is relative. From this you can see that there is a discrepancy between the way things appear and how they actually are. For instance, something may - in terms of how it appears - look good, but, due to its inner nature being different [or "empty" of fixed characteristics], it can turn bad once it is affected by conditions. Food that looks good in a restaurant may not sit so well in your stomach. This is a clear sign of a discrepancy between appearance and reality.
These phenomena themselves are called conventional truths; they are known by consciousness that goes no further than appearances. But the same objects have an inner mode of being, called an ultimate truth, that allows for the changes brought about by conditions. A wise consciousness, not satisfied with mere appearances, analyzes to find whether objects inherently exist as they seem to do but discovers their absence of inherent existence; it finds an emptiness of inherent existence beyond appearance.Related Article: Emptiness Does Not Mean Nothingness
- How to Practise: The Way to a Meaningful Life (His Holiness the Dalai Lama) p.142-143
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