Re: Relationships, Manipulation & Stoic Self-Control
- View SourceGreetings Keith!
Your address to Les' take on my original concern was well
expressed. I especially enjoyed your closing comments.
> ... in setting a goal, one gives every impression ofJack replies:
> attaching an emotional attachment to the outcome...
> ... one has to try to live this teaching. Accomplishing
> this is likened by the Stoics to recovering from an
> illness, and as with some illnesses, one's recovery
> consists of both good days and bad days -- or so I have
> found. It also means seeing things in a different way
> from one's fellows, and in order to maintain social
> relations, one may have to pretend to value outcomes
> even tho you no longer do so.
This appearance, about which we do not overly concern
ourselves what people make of it, is probably fairly
effective through keeping our own counsel. But perhaps
there ought to be a point in some relationships where the
diagnosis is given, and the remedy hinted at. In my
own experience I can see how well or poorly I have lived
by my own wisdom, and also that someone suffering might
be able or willing to use a suggested attitude. Stoicism
is not initially attractive to many people because it would
seem to go against the grain of society, and this is true
to some degree, but, people may openly admire some of
your manifest qualities without understanding just what
goes into your thoughtful everyday approach to life.
I am very interested in this play of appearances, do you
have anything to add to your two original statements?
-- Jack Gendron --