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Re: [SCA Newcomers] advice

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  • bronwynmgn@aol.com
    In a message dated 3/4/2008 9:30:03 P.M. Eastern Standard Time, j_bear81@hotmail.com writes:
    Message 1 of 13 , Mar 5, 2008
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      In a message dated 3/4/2008 9:30:03 P.M. Eastern Standard Time,
      j_bear81@... writes:

      <<I just learned about SCA and am very interested in participating.
      However I am a fairly shy person and am very nervous about going to a
      meeting not knowing any one. I could use some advice on going to a
      meeting for the first time. Some words of encouragement would not hurt
      as well.>>

      A lot of us were pretty shy when we started in the SCA. For some reason, it
      tends to draw shy people :-) So we're used to it, and lot of us have been
      there, myself included. In fact, the SCA is one of the reasons why I am not
      nearly as shy as I used to be. It tends to be a pretty supportive
      environment (not always, there are always people who want to put someone down to make
      themselves feel bigger, but as a whole the SCA is better than general society
      by a long shot). Generally, if you are willing to try something, there will
      be someone to back you up and tell you that you CAN do this.
      Put it this way. When I got out of high school, I had a shell so thick that
      almost nothing could break through it. I very deliberately had developed a
      policy of never reacting to anything because then nobody could use my
      reactions against me. The first step in breaking through it was actually a
      role-playing club I got into in college. At the first meeting I went to, during a
      break in the meeting one of the guys came over and without a word, picked up me
      and the chair I was sitting on and swung me in circles all around the room.
      I yelled at him to put me down, which he did, and then I asked him why he
      had done it. His answer was "I had to get you to react to SOMETHING!" That
      group spent months - years, really - getting me out of that shell. (And yes,
      I'm still in touch with some of them after more than 20 years.) A few years
      after I started hanging out with them, I met the SCA. I was still pretty shy
      and not very self-confident, so much so that my first boss had commented on
      the fact that I needed to improve my self-confidence if I was going to do well
      in my career (I'm a physical therapist). The SCA gave me a place where I
      could experiment with taking on authority - running events, being an officer,
      etc, that was a bigger circle than the role-playing club, but not as big as
      the real world. Now, I can teach classes, speak in public at work, and so
      forth without freezing up. I even sing solo at SCA events, (and only at SCA
      events) because I know that I will have a courteous audience, and that if anyone
      feels the need to comment, they will mostly likely give me a gentle
      suggestion instead of telling me I stink. I know this because I have seen some really
      bad performers get up and perform at SCA events, and be received politely.

      My advice is to take it slowly. Don't try to push yourself to something too
      far outside your comfort level too quickly. If somebody tells you that you
      HAVE to go to the great party and perform, it's OK to tell them that you
      aren't into that, or that you'd like to go to just watch. It will be respected
      in most cases. But definitely try to stretch your wings a little.


      Brangwayna Morgan
      Shire of Silver Rylle, East Kingdom
      Lancaster, PA



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    • PATRICIA BENTLEY
      Jess Dont be nervous as most in all groups will make you feel welcome the moment you walk in if it is easier for you meet people with a friend in tow then pick
      Message 2 of 13 , Mar 5, 2008
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        Jess

        Dont be nervous as most in all groups will make you feel welcome the moment you walk in if it is easier for you meet people with a friend in tow then pick up on the newbie board and become friends with others first make your first event something simple. A class or fighting group were it is small and not as busy, YOu can also meet up wiht the chaitlaine of your group first and ask to meet her/ him then you can arrange a meeting at the event or before so you are not going in completely blind. Remember you are going to have fun and learn new things and everyone is new at something once or twice in there life. Be yourself and enjoy before you know you will be making more friends then you can name

        gisele


        To: scanewcomers@yahoogroups.comFrom: j_bear81@...: Wed, 5 Mar 2008 02:06:58 +0000Subject: [SCA Newcomers] advice




        Hi,I just learned about SCA and am very interested in participating. However I am a fairly shy person and am very nervous about going to a meeting not knowing any one. I could use some advice on going to a meeting for the first time. Some words of encouragement would not hurt as well.Jess






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      • Let's just leave it as "Sean"
        My deepest apologies for addressing you as M lord. I saw Jess and thought Jesse (as in James). I truly feel the dullard for assuming, we all know what
        Message 3 of 13 , Mar 5, 2008
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          My deepest apologies for addressing you as M'lord. I saw Jess and
          thought Jesse (as in James). I truly feel the dullard for assuming,
          we all know what happens when you assume.
          Once again my deepest and most sincere apologies.
          Pax, Sean the Poor
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