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technical advice

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  • Bunty Golightly
    Hello chums ! Bunty back again from a jolly fortnight s foxhunting with me horsey pals down in the West Country [of England].Jolly good fun --don t yer know ?
    Message 1 of 1 , Feb 1, 2001
      Hello chums ! Bunty back again from a jolly
      fortnight's foxhunting with me horsey pals down in the
      West Country [of England].Jolly good fun --don't yer
      know ?
      I have asked old Grubby Dipstick about a couple of
      very technical questions that have appeared on the
      group lately , namely the "sound" of the exhaust and
      the "short gear lever" problem . His advice is as
      follows :-
      1/ remove the silencer , place it upright upon the
      floor with the inlet end uppermost , take a large
      steel bar[at least 7/8 of an inch in dia , about 4
      feet long and place this within the inlet ,raise the
      bar and then bring it smartly down upon the baffles
      within the silencer ,repeat this procedure until all
      the baffles fall out of the other end . Reinstall the
      silencer ,which won't be quite so silent now . Another
      name for this procedure is "exhaust tuning ".
      2/ remove the gear lever , place it in a vice , heat
      the bend with an oxyacetylene torch , straighten the
      bend .Now heat the lever a bit lower down [ closer to
      your foot] [ no --- I mean closer to where your foot
      would be if it were still on the bike ] , now bend the
      lever to a 90 deg angle . Allow to cool and hacksaw
      off the excess , paint the lever black if you want to
      Another name for this is ergo-
      whatthebloodyhell?-nomics. If the effort to change
      gear is too great , then a training regime of double
      helpings of roast beef and Yorkshire pudding and
      kicking the neighbour's dog at every opportunity
      should tone up those leg and toe muscles for a snappy
      gearchange .
      I have been assured by Grubby that these are highly
      secret tuning mods used by TT stars of the past and as
      such should not be shared with outsiders -- nudge
      nudge , wink wink !
      Of course one should not attempt these highly
      technical modifications one's self , if your
      manservant is not available one should have the
      village blacksmith perform them .
      Well chums, it was very illuminating to read the
      emails that arrived whilst I was away and I see those
      devilish darkies are at it again , Jan must be a bad
      influence on 'em , gets 'em riled up , don't yer see !
      Anyway I must say "toodle pip for now" , I have to
      find Miss Everready for a game of "hide the sausage"
      ,--guffaw guffaw --
      Bottoms Up
      Maj Bunty Golightly ,MFH, BSA , NUT , SOT{&bar} , BSE
      ,BS[mentioned in despatches]

      http://cars.yahoo.com.au/ - Yahoo! Cars
      - Buy, sell or finance a car..
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