JEST FOR KIDS 07-09-13
Riddles and Puns for the 8 to 14 year old
What has four legs and only one foot?
Why did the doctor pour medicine on his computer?
It had a virus.
What do they call cabs lined up at the Austin airport?
The yellow rows of taxis.
Why did Washington chop down the cherry tree with his hatchet?
Because his mom wouldn't let him play with the chain saw.
PUNS & SHORT JOKES
The report said I had type-A blood, but it was a type-O
He went to a costume ball as a skeleton, but he had no body to dance with.
When the King asked the fool for a joke the fool just shrugged. He was the court gesture.
A man was hit on the head during a hail storm and was knocked out cold.
'I Hate the Sun' by Gladys Knight
'How to Care For Gardens' by Manuel Labour
'My Black Belt' by Marsha Larts
"Teach Ne Now' by I. Wanda Know
'The British Detectives" by Scott Linyard
GROANERS & LONG JOKES
Do not drink when you drive; that's the pith
Of a phrase that is true. It's no myth,
Because if you go forth
With a fifth on the fourth,
You may never drive forth on the fifth.
Once some burglars broke out in the bank, one of them pointing the gun to the cashier, said, "Give me all your money, or you'll be GEOGRAPHY!" The cashier laughed and said, "You mean to say HISTORY." The burglar answered, "Don't change the subject."
Finding one of her students making faces at others on the playground, Ms. Smith stopped to gently reprove the child. Smiling sweetly, the Sunday school teacher said, "Johnny, when I was a child, I was told if that I made an ugly face, it would freeze and I would stay like that." Johnny looked up and replied, " Well, Ms. Smith, you can't say you weren't warned."
"Have you ever seen a twenty dollar bill all crumpled up?" asked the wife. "No," I said. She gave me a sexy little smile, slowly reached into her bra and pulled out a crumpled twenty-dollar bill. "Have you ever seen a fifty dollar bill all crumpled up?" she asked. "No," I said. She gave me another sexy little smile, seductively reached into her panties and pulled out a crumpled fifty-dollar bill. "Now," she said, "have you ever seen 30,000 dollars all crumpled up?" "No," I said, intrigued. "Well, go and take a quick look in the garage."
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]