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Some Jabberwacky Poems

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  • Stan Kegel
    SOME JABBERWACKY POEMS With Apologies To Lewis Carroll jABBERCANDY By Dwight Gleason Twas hershey, and the chocolate fudge Did boil and bubble in the vat; All
    Message 1 of 1 , Jul 7, 2013
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      SOME JABBERWACKY POEMS
      With Apologies To Lewis Carroll

      jABBERCANDY
      By Dwight Gleason

      'Twas hershey, and the chocolate fudge
      Did boil and bubble in the vat;
      All melted were the M&Ms,
      Just looking made you fat

      "Beware the Saccharin, my son!
      Its cancer kills like poison dip!
      Beware the Jujube, and shun
      The snaky licorice whip!"

      He took his candy sword in hand;
      Long time the wrigley foe he sought--
      So rested he by the Mars-bar tree,
      And stood awhile in thought.

      And, as in reese's thought he stood,
      The Saccharine, with eyes of flame,
      Came skittling through the starburst wood,
      And snickered as it came!

      One two! One two! And through and through
      The candy blade with twinkie foam!
      He left it dead, and with its head
      He trick-or-treated home.

      "And hast thou slain the Saccharin?
      Like tried the FDA?"
      And in his mouth went Almond Joys,
      (He ate food all the day.)

      'Twas hershey, and the chocolate fudge
      Did boil and bubble in the vat;
      All melted were the M&Ms,
      Just looking made you fat.

      = = = = =

      PLAIN GEOMETRY
      By Emma Rounds

      'Twas Euclid and the theorem pi
      Did plane and solid in the text,
      All parallel were the radii,
      And the ang-gulls convex'd.

      "Beware the Wentworth-Smith, my son,
      And the Loci that vacillate;
      Beware the Axiom, and shun
      The faithless Postulate."

      He took his Waterman in hand;
      Long time the proper proof he sought;
      Then rested he by the XYZ
      And sat awhile in thought.

      And as in inverse thought he sat
      A brilliant proof, in lines of flame,
      All neat and trim, it came to him.
      Tangenting as it came.

      "AB, CD," reflected he--
      The Waterman went snicker-snack--
      He Q. E. D. -d, and, proud indeed,
      He trapezoided back.

      "And hast thou proved the 29th?
      Come to my arms, my radius boy!
      Oh good for you! O one point two!"
      He rhombused in his joy.

      'Twas Euclid and the theorem pi
      Did plane and solid in the text,
      All parallel were the radii,
      And the ang-gulls convex'd

      = = = = =

      JABBERSTOCKY
      By Peter Stucki

      Twas bullig, and the slithy brokers
      Did buy and gamble in the craze
      All rosy were the Dow Jones stokers
      By market's wrath unfazed.

      "Beware the Jabberstock, my son!
      The cost that bites, the worth that falls!
      Beware the Econ'mist's word, and shun
      The spurious Street o' Walls!"

      He took his forecast sword in hand:
      Long time the Boesk'some foe he sought--
      Sake's liquidity, so d'vested he,
      And stood awhile in thought.

      And as in bearish thought he stood
      The Jabberstock, with clothes of tweed,
      Came waffling with the truth too good,
      And yuppied great with greed!

      Chip Black! Chip Blue! And through and through
      The forecast blade went snicker-snack!
      It bit the dirt, and with its shirt,
      He went rebounding back.

      "And hast thou slain the Jabberstock?
      Come to my firm, V.P. ish boy!
      O big bucks day! Moolah! Good Play!"
      He bought him a Mercedes Toy.

      Twas panic, and the slithy brokers
      Did gyre and tumble in the Crash
      All flimsy were the Dow Jones stokers
      And mammon's wrath them bash!

      = = = = =

      THE DERIVATIVE
      By Francis J Menotti

      'Twas boring, and his lofty gaze
      did nod and waver from its task.
      Although he had been in a daze,
      his daydream he did mask.

      "Beware derivatives, students!
      The functions, primes, and asymptotes.
      Beware all calculus and hence
      refrain from taking notes."

      He took his purple pen in hand,
      long poem his wand'ring mind did write.
      So scribbled he his words to be:
      indeed a worthy sight!

      But though a worthy sight it seemed,
      reality, with wrath unfurled
      came flailing back--its strength redeemed--
      while confidence it hurled.

      One, two! One, two! The numbers grew.
      The purple ink went splitter-splat.
      And through his head, the numbers sped
      as patiently he sat.

      "Well, have you solved the problem yet?
      Come to the board, you number-sleuth!"
      Once satisfied, professor sighed,
      "You're wise despite your youth."

      'Twas boring, and his lofty gaze
      did nod and waver from its task.
      Although he had been in a daze,
      his daydream he did mask.



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