Jest For Kids 04-01-13
- JEST FOR KIDS 04-01-13
Riddles and Puns for the 8 to 14 year old
What did the bee say to the flower?
What time do you open?
Why did Pilgrims' pants always fall down?
Because they wore their belt buckle on their hat
What do you use to clean a tuba?
A tuba toothpaste
Why did the Sheriff use a ruler when he questioned the witness?
He wanted to get the story straight.
PUNS & SHORT JOKES
Statisticians say 'mean' things.
Bungee jumpers listen to Big Band Music.
I buy all my guns from a guy named T-Rex. He's a small arms dealer.
In elementary school, I was an outstanding student. My teacher would send me to stand outside of the class as a punishment.
Donation: The homeland of that Pillsbury boy.
Microsoft Word: A whisper
Homepage: Section in the newspaper with houses for sale.
Conductors: Ticket takers on trains.
Digital Control: What your fingers do with the TV remote.
GROANERS & LONG JOKES
The young gull was an only child. He was well behaved and a delight to his mother. The mother said to her infant. "As you have been so good, would you like a brother" The small bird replied, "Oh Yes! One good tern deserves another."
On a hot summer day, my wife, eight-year-old son, Ron, and I were eating ice cream cones. I noticed the ice cream on Ron's face and asked him, "Can't you eat ice cream without getting it all over you face?" "I don't know," he replied, "I never tried."
In the early years of unmanned space exploration, NASA experts determined that monkeys were not genetically suited for certain zero‑gravity experiments. To rectify the problem, the scientists requisitioned twelve holstein cows from the Department of Agriculture, loaded them aboard a satellite, and launched it into orbit. The animals became known as the herd shot round the world.
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