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Jest For Kids 01-30-13

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  • Stan Kegel
    JEST FOR KIDS 01-30-13 Riddles and Puns for the 8 to 14 year old RIDDLES What goes up but never comes down? Your age Why are cheetahs an endangered species?
    Message 1 of 1 , Jan 30, 2013
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      JEST FOR KIDS 01-30-13
      Riddles and Puns for the 8 to 14 year old

      RIDDLES

      What goes up but never comes down?
      Your age

      Why are cheetahs an endangered species?
      Because cheetahs never prosper

      What happened to the egg that laughed too hard?
      It cracked up

      What sits on the bottom of the ocean and shakes?
      A nervous wreck

      What do you call a lady magician?
      Trixie

      PUNS & SHORT JOKES

      The dentist examined the golfer's teeth and fold him he had a hole in one.

      She stared at the orange juice container because it said, Concentrate."

      I made a batch of fish eye soup. It should see me through the week.

      The patient decided against an organ transplant. Instead, he changed his mind.

      PUN SERIES

      Don't stick your elbow
      Out so far
      It may go home
      In another car
      Burma Shave

      Speed was high, Weather was not
      Tires were thin, X marks the spot. Burma Shave

      At intersections Look each way
      A harp sounds nice But it's hard to play . Burma Shave

      She kissed the hairbrush By mistake
      She thought it was Her husband jake Burma Shave

      Cautious rider To her reckless dear:
      Let's have less bull And a little more steer Burma Shave

      GROANERS & LONG JOKES

      When high jumping, never admit
      Defeat. Just keep trying; don't quit.
      Though you might get depressed,
      Don't give up on your quest.
      I know you will get over it.
      (Kirk Miller)

      My friend sat down with a new client at her gym to review her application. For the question "To what do you attribute your fitness issues?" the woman wrote, "Horrendous eating habits." "What makes you answer that?" my friend asked. The woman replied, "I can't spell atrocious."

      A young boy enters a barbershop and the barber whispers to his customer, "This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you." The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, "Which do you want, son?" The boy takes the quarters and leaves. "What did I tell you?" said the barber. "That kid never learns!" Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store. "Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?" The boy licked his cone, smiled and replied: "Because the day I take the dollar, the game's over!"



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