Jest For Kids 12-01-11
- JEST FOR KIDS 12-01-11
Riddles and Puns for the 8 to 14 year old
I WILL BE TAKING THE MONTH OF DECEMBER OFF FOR VACATION AND REST. AND WILL SEND OUT JEST FOR KIDS ABOUT TWICE A WEEK. JEST FOR KIDS WILL RETURN TO 5 DAYS A WEEK IN JANUARY.
How many reindeer does Santa Have???
10 -- Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen Rudoph (the one with the red nose) Olive (Olive the other reindeer)
What do you call a cat on the beach at Christmas time?
Mom, can I have a dog for Christmas?
No, you can have turkey like everyone else
What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus?
PUNS & SHORT JOKES
If Santa Claus had a father, was there a Grandfather Clause?
Christmas is the time of year when mother has to separate the men from the toys.
My father gave me a bat for Christmas. The first time I tried to play with it, it flew away. (Rodney Dangerfield)
When cannibals ate a missionary they got a taste of religion.
Define "Somersault": Seasoning used during the warm months of the year.
Use "Hatchet" in a sentence: Our science project is to incubate a duck egg and HATCHET.
Ads: Ad for a men's clothing store: "Men's wool suits, $20. They won't last an hour!"
Doctor, doctor, I'm only four feet tall.
You'll just have to be a little patient.
GROANERS & LONG JOKES
God rest ye merry, gentlemen,
Let nothing you dismay.
Unless its all the Christmas bills
Your wife told you to pay.
I asked the little boy why he was rubbing his teeth against the icy wrought iron swinging entrance, and he answered, "I always brush my teeth with cold gates." (Cynthia MacGregor)
A man called his mother in Florida. "Mom, how are you?" "Not too good," said the mother. "I've been very weak." The son said, "Why are you so weak?" She said, "Because I haven't eaten in 38 days." The son said, "That's terrible. Why haven't you eaten in 38 days?" "Because I didn't want my mouth to be filled with food if you should call."
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