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Jest For Kids 08-02 10

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  • Stan Kegel
    JEST FOR KIDS 08-02-10 Riddles and Puns for the 8 to 14 year old HOMEWORK Can you make sense out of this riddle using punctuation marks? What is a four letter
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      JEST FOR KIDS 08-02-10
      Riddles and Puns for the 8 to 14 year old

      HOMEWORK

      Can you make sense out of this riddle using punctuation marks?

      What is a four letter word for a three letter word which has five
      letters yet is still spelled with three letters while it has only two

      ANSWER:
      "What" is a four-letter word, "for" a three-letter word;
      "which" has five letters;
      "yet" is still spelled with three letters,
      while "it" has only two.
      (By Gary Hallock)

      RIDDLES

      When does a newspaper get arrested?
      When the comic strips.

      What happened to the sardine when it didn't show up for work?
      It was canned.

      What do you call a cat that swallows a duck?
      A duck-filled-fatty-pus

      What happens when a duck flies upside down?
      It quacks up

      Why did Mrs. Lion break up with Mr. Lion?
      Because she thought he was a cheetah!

      Have you heard about the firefly who backed into the candle?
      He was delighted, no end. (Richard Lederer)

      What is the most dangerous part of a car?
      The nut that holds the steering wheel.

      SCHOOL WORK

      Define "Hawaii": The place where men make passes at girls who wear grasses.

      Use "Carnation" in a sentence: "Chinese use bicycles, but Japan is a CARNATION." (Bob Dvorak)

      A Sunday school student was asked to list the Ten Commandments in any order. His answer was "3, 6, 1, 8, 4, 5, 9, 2, 10, 7." (Richard Lederer)

      Book Title: "Off to Market" by Tobias A. Pigg

      Sign on a Church's outdoor sign: "7 days without God makes one weak."

      "I can do an excellent impression of Sinatra," said Tom, being perfectly frank.

      PUNS & OTHER HUMOR

      Knock Knock!
      Who’s there?
      Wendy!
      Wendy Who?
      Wendy the last time you took a bath?

      She used to be a schoolteacher but she has no class now.

      There's nothing sadder than a bloodhound trying to find himself. (Frank & Ernest: Bob Thaves)

      When the man hit his head on the doorway and sued, his lawyer advised to settle for a lump sum.

      As Noah remarked as the animals were entering the Ark, "Now I herd everything." (Bennett Cerf)

      A woman was out driving with her husband. She was speeding along about fifty when a motorcycle cop appeared alongside and indicated for her to pull over. The cop looked at her and said, "Hmmm. I'm going to put you down for fifty-five." She turned to her husband. "See! I told you this hat makes me look old."
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