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Jest For Kids 06-01-10

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  • Stan Kegel
    JEST FOR KIDS 06-01-10 Riddles and Puns for the 8 to 14 year old RIDDLES What did the pen say to the pencil? So, what s your point? Where are you most likely
    Message 1 of 1 , Jun 1, 2010
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      JEST FOR KIDS 06-01-10
      Riddles and Puns for the 8 to 14 year old

      RIDDLES

      What did the pen say to the pencil?
      "So, what's your point?"

      Where are you most likely to catch a cold
      On a–choo–choo–train.

      What should you wear to tell your co-workers you were fired.
      A pink slip.

      What's the difference between a jeweler and a jailer?
      A jeweler sells watches. A jailer watches cells.

      Why is a groupie like a man hit by a Wells Fargo wagon?
      They are both stage struck

      What did the robber get for robbing the rubber band factory
      A long stretch

      SCHOOL WORK

      Define "Parking lot": A place where arguments start from scratch

      Use "Gruesome" in a sentence: My children GRUESOME squash and radishes in the garden last year.

      Old musicians never die, they just get played out.

      A boy and his father are playing with toy cars, the father has the police car and pretends to pull over the car that the boy is playing with. "Do you have a drivers license?" asks the father. "No," says the boy. "Are you resisting arrest?" he asks. The boy hesitates before he says, "No, I'm not sleepy yet."

      2000 mockingbirds = 2 kilomockingbirds

      The PhD's diet: change your weight by degrees.

      Warning Labels: Arm & Hammer Scoopable Cat Litter: "Safe to use around pets."

      PUNS & OTHER HUMOR

      Did you hear about the guy that lost his left arm and leg in a motorcycle accident? He's all right now.

      If you aren't fired with enthusiasm, you will be fired with enthusiasm. (Vince Lombardi)

      A dog owner had a pit bull that hated to walk. He kept sitting down and bracing his feet so that his owner would have to drag him by his leash. The owner finally gave up when he realized that he was creating a bottomless pit!

      A tattoo artist has designs on his clients.

      Graveyard workers really dig their jobs.

      A man goes into a pet store and asks the clerk, "Do you have any dogs that go cheap?" The Clerk says, "No, We have birds that go cheep, all our dogs bark!"

      Last night I dreamt that I was a muffler. I woke up exhausted!
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