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Jest For Kids 04-01-09

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  • Stan Kegel
    JEST FOR KIDS 04-01-09 Riddles and Puns for the 8 to 14 year old RIDDLES Why couldn t the pony talk? He was a little horse. Why did the lazy man want to work
    Message 1 of 1 , Apr 1 1:30 AM
      JEST FOR KIDS 04-01-09
      Riddles and Puns for the 8 to 14 year old

      RIDDLES

      Why couldn't the pony talk?
      He was a little horse.

      Why did the lazy man want to work in a bakery?
      Because he would be paid lots of dough for just loafing around.

      What do you use to clean a tuba?
      A tuba toothpaste.

      How does a broom act?
      With sweeping gestures.

      What did the earthquake say after it stopped shaking?
      It's not my fault!

      What do you get when you cross a parrot with an eagle?
      A paralegal.

      Do moths cry?
      Sure. Haven't you ever seen a moth bawl?

      Can you spell a composition with two letters?
      SA (essay).

      PUNS & OTHER HUMOR

      The dead batteries were given out free of charge.

      Sign on an optometrist's office: If you don't see what you're looking
      for, you've come to the right place. (Sandy Sibert)

      It was a summer night in 1942 when we landed in a small inlet on the
      coast of the Red Sea. Our orders were clear. Dressed as Bedouins we
      were to cross the Arabian Desert to meet our contacts near the Nile,
      where we were to obtain vital information regarding Rommel's forces.
      We were given a map showing each rivulet and creek as we could carry
      only a limited amount of water. We had to travel primarily at night
      because of the extreme heat. Each time we reached another creek on the
      map, we would find only a wadi, totally dry this time of the year. In
      spite of extreme thirst and dehydration, we finally staggered to our
      assigned destination where we were met by Arab nomads loyal to the
      Allied cause. We explained that we had crossed the desert without
      water as every river bed was dry. "Of course," we were told. "You went
      from one ex-stream to another." (By Stan Kegel)

      "I've lost my gold mine!" Tom exclaimed.

      The Vatican has decided that it is not a sin to kiss a nun, just don't
      get into the habit.

      A young missionary on his first term in Africa was reading his Bible
      in a clearing when a lion came up and laid down beside him. As he
      quietly prayed for deliverance, another lion came out of the bush and
      laid down by his other side. Convinced that this was a test of his
      faith, he returned to reading his Bible. As soon as he did, the two
      lions pounced on him and devoured him. Moral: Don't try to read
      between the lions.

      Island: Every time I try the trampoline, ISLAND on my butt. (Cynthia
      MacGregor)

      The composition teacher asked the class to write about an unusual
      event that happened during the past week. Little Johnny got up and
      read his essay. It began, "Daddy fell into the well last week..." "My
      goodness!" the teacher exclaimed. "Is he all right?" "He must be,"
      said the boy. "He stopped yelling for help yesterday."

      Before buying a book on trees, it is a good idea to leaf through.

      When she got married, she got a new name and a dress.
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