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Jest For Kids 06-02-08

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  • Stan Kegel
    JEST FOR KIDS 06-02-08 Riddles and Puns for the 8 to 14 year old RIDDLES A faucet, lettuce and a tomato were in a race...what happened? The faucet was running,
    Message 1 of 1 , Jun 2 2:18 AM
      JEST FOR KIDS 06-02-08
      Riddles and Puns for the 8 to 14 year old

      RIDDLES

      A faucet, lettuce and a tomato were in a race...what happened?
      The faucet was running, the lettuce was ahead, and the tomato was
      trying to ketchup!

      What kind of band doesn't make music?
      A rubber band.

      Why did the kid put his head on the piano?
      Because he wanted to play by ear.

      What is a boiling kettle's favorite song?
      "Home on the Range. "

      Who was Mr. Ferris?
      He was a big wheel in the amusement park business.

      Who wrote, "Oh, say can you see?"
      An eye doctor.

      PUNS

      Never let your worries get the best of you; remember, Moses started
      out as a basket case.

      A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two-tired.

      The brain is a wonderful thing, it starts working the second you get
      up in the morning and never stops until you get asked a question in
      class

      A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.

      A guy walks into a bar with a hunk of pavement under his arm. The
      bartender looks at the pavement for a bit and then finally says,
      "What'll ya have?" The guys says, "One for me and one for the road."

      GROANERS & SHAGGY PUPPY STORIES

      Memorial Day weekend was coming up, and the nursery school teacher
      took the opportunity to tell her class about patriotism. "We live in a
      great country," she said. "One of the things we should be happy is
      that, in this country, we are all free." One little boy came walking
      up to her from the back of the room. He stood with his hands on his
      hips and said... "I'm not free. I'm four."

      A farmer was milking his cow. He was just starting to get a good
      rhythm going when a bug flew into the barn and started circling his
      head. Suddenly, the bug flew into the cow's ear. The farmer didn't
      think much about it, until the bug squirted out into his bucket. It
      went in one ear and out the udder.

      To make sure the newspaper got out in time, the management made sure
      that the folks working the overnight shift were fed. After all, at the
      time, there weren't any all night diners open in the town. To get
      around this, the company provided trays of sandwich fixings and snacks
      for the city desk reporters and staff. One morning, as he was just
      getting ready to start on his last article, a hungry editor turned to
      a reporter and asked if there was any food left. "Yeah, I think
      there's a piece of cake left, but it's not for you." "Why not?" asked
      the editor. "Because you can't have your cake and edit, too!"

      OTHER HUMOR

      Converse: Poetry written by prison inmates

      OLD CHEMISTS never die, they just fail to react.

      She was so Blonde when she heard that 90% of all crimes occur around
      the home, she moved.
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