Jest For Kids 06-02-08
- JEST FOR KIDS 06-02-08
Riddles and Puns for the 8 to 14 year old
A faucet, lettuce and a tomato were in a race...what happened?
The faucet was running, the lettuce was ahead, and the tomato was
trying to ketchup!
What kind of band doesn't make music?
A rubber band.
Why did the kid put his head on the piano?
Because he wanted to play by ear.
What is a boiling kettle's favorite song?
"Home on the Range. "
Who was Mr. Ferris?
He was a big wheel in the amusement park business.
Who wrote, "Oh, say can you see?"
An eye doctor.
Never let your worries get the best of you; remember, Moses started
out as a basket case.
A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two-tired.
The brain is a wonderful thing, it starts working the second you get
up in the morning and never stops until you get asked a question in
A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
A guy walks into a bar with a hunk of pavement under his arm. The
bartender looks at the pavement for a bit and then finally says,
"What'll ya have?" The guys says, "One for me and one for the road."
GROANERS & SHAGGY PUPPY STORIES
Memorial Day weekend was coming up, and the nursery school teacher
took the opportunity to tell her class about patriotism. "We live in a
great country," she said. "One of the things we should be happy is
that, in this country, we are all free." One little boy came walking
up to her from the back of the room. He stood with his hands on his
hips and said... "I'm not free. I'm four."
A farmer was milking his cow. He was just starting to get a good
rhythm going when a bug flew into the barn and started circling his
head. Suddenly, the bug flew into the cow's ear. The farmer didn't
think much about it, until the bug squirted out into his bucket. It
went in one ear and out the udder.
To make sure the newspaper got out in time, the management made sure
that the folks working the overnight shift were fed. After all, at the
time, there weren't any all night diners open in the town. To get
around this, the company provided trays of sandwich fixings and snacks
for the city desk reporters and staff. One morning, as he was just
getting ready to start on his last article, a hungry editor turned to
a reporter and asked if there was any food left. "Yeah, I think
there's a piece of cake left, but it's not for you." "Why not?" asked
the editor. "Because you can't have your cake and edit, too!"
Converse: Poetry written by prison inmates
OLD CHEMISTS never die, they just fail to react.
She was so Blonde when she heard that 90% of all crimes occur around
the home, she moved.