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7 Nissan

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  • Ora K
    In the merit of this learning may Ofer ben Chaya be blessed with an immediate refuah shleima bitoch she ar cholei yisrael.  I Although we are allowed to
    Message 1 of 4 , Mar 17, 2013
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      In the merit of this learning may Ofer ben Chaya be blessed with an immediate refuah shleima bitoch she'ar cholei yisrael. 

      I
      Although we are allowed to discuss childrens age appropriate behavior in most cases, if as a result of discussing this negative behavior (even if it age appropriate) you will cause the child or the parent harm, we need to be careful not to say it. Specifically, how we speak about children can reflect badly on their parents, influence how the parents and others see and treat them, and influence the child themselves as we are reinforcing negative behavior. 

      II - example
      You tell a foster parent, "Your 2 year old foster child is so stubborn" Although this is age appropriate, saying such a comment could influence their attitude towards the child and might influence them to stop caring for the child. 

      (Purity of Speech by C.T. Friedman)

      Create a meaningful day!
      - Ora

    • Ora K
      In the merit of this learning may Malachi Shmuel ben Esther Rachel and Gershon Aharon ben Devorah each be blessed with an immediate refuah shelima bitoch
      Message 2 of 4 , Apr 8, 2014
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        In the merit of this learning may Malachi Shmuel ben Esther Rachel and Gershon Aharon ben Devorah each be blessed with an immediate refuah shelima bitoch she'ar cholei yisrael. 

        I
        Before giving someone marriage advice, before commenting on someones shalom bayit or what seems to be a lack thereof, and before verbally judging someone elses relationship, realize that all relationships are different and that people need different things from relationships, and ask yourself - "will what I am saying help or harm there relationship? What is the goal of my words?" Sometimes what we see as innocently or supportively 'siding' with one person, can cause a tremendous breakdown in a relationship and make things worse for that person by turning them against their partner and making them see everything in a more negative light. 

        II
        If you are saying something to someone about their relationship to help them in their relationship, ask yourself - "am I the best person to make these comments? Will my comments be effective? Is there someone else (maybe a professional) who would be more effective?"

        Create a meaningful day!
        - Ora
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