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1578TheOnion: Tom DeLay To Pursue Corruption In Private Sector

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  • Ram Lau
    Apr 4, 2006
      Tom DeLay To Pursue Corruption In Private Sector

      April 5, 2006 | Issue 42•14

      STAFFORD, TX—Former House Majority Leader Tom DeLay, who is facing
      several ethics violations and felony charges, announced Tuesday that
      he will resign from Congress in order to concentrate on corruption in
      the private sector. "I can say with a clear lack of conscience that,
      after 21 years of public disservice, I have done everything I could to
      the American people," DeLay said in a televised statement to
      constituents. "I have a lot to offer the corporate world, such as
      money laundering and influence-peddling." DeLay added that, before
      assuming his new irresponsibilities, he looks forward to spending more
      time alienating his family and cheating on his wife.