Loading ...
Sorry, an error occurred while loading the content.

XP - The Essence of the Nigerian Scam

Expand Messages
  • Ned Barnett
    If you re like me, you get a regular stream of wonderful, generous offers in your email. Isn t it amazing how many people are dying of cancer, or who had
    Message 1 of 1 , Aug 31, 2009
      If you're like me, you get a regular stream of wonderful, generous offers in
      your email. Isn't it amazing how many people are dying of cancer, or who
      had relatives killed by an African civil war, or who are serving in Iraq and
      uncovered Saddam's secret stash - or who just have a business proposition -
      and who want to make you very wealthy? I bet there are also a remarkable
      number of truly wealthy people dying in the UK who remembered you in their
      will, or who discovered that you won the Irish Lottery or some other
      gambling event - and just because you don't remember buying a lottery
      ticket, that doesn't disqualify you from winning?

      I'm amazed, too. All those hundreds of millions of dollars out there, all
      intended for you (or me) if only we'd respond to an email.

      I know that virtually all of these are legitimate - why else would total
      strangers want to give you money? However, a small - vanishingly small -
      number are likely to be scams, variations of the old Nigerian scam of the
      1980s. And just so you won't get burnt, I'd like to help you discover how
      to identify the frauds.

      First, if the person tells you that their name is Mr. (or Mrs., or Miss -
      but never Ms.) ____, then they are probably not legitimate. Nowhere in the
      civilized world do people routinely introduce themselves as Mr. (or Mrs., or
      Miss - but never Ms.) Anything - it's archaic. However, Nigeria was a
      British colony until the 60s, and their English is still tainted by a kind
      of Received British formalism that is 50 years out of date. So if it sounds
      archaic and overly formal, it's probably not real.

      Next, if they inform you that surely you must be surprised to hear from them
      since you've never met, it is reasonably certain that the email is
      fraudulent. Real people wanting to give away real money will realize that
      the surprise comes in the form of the dollar-value of the offer, rather than
      the "surprise" of receiving an unsolicited email from a stranger. We all
      get emails from strangers every day - no surprise there - but getting an
      offer for $10 million dollars - how often does that happen? If you're like
      me, not more than three or four times a week, and every time I'm completely

      If the email refers to you as a dear friend or beloved one or any other kind
      of endearment, don't trust it. Legitimate business offers of tens of
      millions of dollars do not, routinely, include such personal greetings.
      After all, business is business, and deals involving giving away big money
      is too serious to be clouded by such tender words. This also applies to
      appeals to God or the bestowing of Blessings - your average international
      John Beresford Tipton doesn't rely on God's Blessing when giving away
      mega-bucks. Perhaps they believe that $10 or $25 million is blessing
      enough, and God knows that they'd be right in thinking that.

      However, if the email is from someone dying from cancer who has a family
      full of vultures who will not respect his charitable desires, believe him.
      Take his money and give it to your favorite charity (remembering, of course,
      that charity begins at home). We all know that people die of cancer and
      that relatives are vultures. Help them and grow rich.

      If you get an email from someone who's close relative (husband, father,
      etc.) was killed in a tribal squabble in central Africa, and who died
      leaving many millions of dollars that the surviving relative wants to get
      out of the country without attracting notice, believe her. Leaders sitting
      on millions of dollars are hacked to death by machetes every day in Africa,
      and all have relatives wanting to smuggle the money out of Africa and into
      the US. Help them and grow rich.

      If you get an email from a sergeant in the US Marine Corps who found one of
      Saddam's hidden stashes of ill-gotten loot, and who wants to safely smuggle
      the money out of Iraq so the corrupt local regime can't grab it and use it
      for nefarious purposes, believe him. Don't automatically trust an Air Force
      puke - or an officer - but if you get a sergeant, especially a Marine, you
      know that you can trust him. Marines are inherently trustworthy. Semper Fi,
      mac .

      If you get an email from a Barrister in England who has a will to settle -
      and who believes that you might be the only surviving relative, believe him.
      Everybody knows that lawyers in the UK are called Barristers, and that
      they're far more honest than American lawyers. Perhaps they're called
      Barristers because Shakespeare wrote that first, we should kill all the
      lawyers - but we all know that he meant slip-and-fall ambulance-chasing
      shysters from Dallas, not honest Barristers from the UK.

      I think that covers it - however, if you know of any other tell-tale
      give-aways - clear clues as to whether such an email is legit or not - I'd
      like to hear from you. And as soon as I get my millions out of Tikrit and
      Lagos, I'll be sure to cut you in on a percentage. Just send me your bank
      account number, your ATM pass-code and your social security number and I'll
      take it from here.

      All the best


      Ned Barnett, APR

      Marketing/PR Fellow, American Hospital Association

      Barnett Marketing Communications

      420 N. Nellis Blvd. A3-276

      Las Vegas NV 89110

      702-696-1200 - ned@...


      [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
    Your message has been successfully submitted and would be delivered to recipients shortly.