PSYCHOTECHNOLOGIES, EXERCISES, EXPERIMENTS THAT ENHANCE POLY RELATIONS
- PSYCHOTECHNOLOGIES, EXERCISES, EXPERIMENTS THAT ENHANCE POLY RELATIONS
Share What Works, Experiments Worth Trying
Here's one of ours:
EMPATHIZE, STAY LINKED WITH YOUR PRIMARY IN POLY PLAY by Sasha Lessin
TRY THIS EXERCISE WITH YOUR LOVES AND LET US KNOW ON THIS SITE HOW
THE EXERCISE WORKED FOR YOU!
Partner up for the experience below, so you each explore your inner
jealous and empathetic voices and strengthen your discerning Center.
You befriend your inner Jealous Voice, see how it developed and learn
how it helped and keeps helping you.
Your Jealous Voice confronts you with your deepest needs; it can show
what you need to do to love yourself and let others love you.
Jealousy points to what you can reprogram to become more loving to
yourself and others. You learn to both honor and transcend your
jealous concerns. You re-experience the underlying, loving
consciousness you, your beloveds and their beloveds share.
In the Jealousy/Empathy experience, you balance your Jealous Voice
with your Empathetic one. Your Empathetic voice celebrates the joy
your beloveds share with others.
You feel both Jealous and Empathetic Voices from a discerning, inner
perspective. When you embrace both voices, you are in your Center or
Aware Ego. Your Center values both jealousy and empathy. Your Center
also hears and honors the needs, hurts, fears and delights of the
Child within that the Jealous Voice protects.
Honor your Jealous Voice's impulse: protect your Inner Child; assure
it love. Heed also your Empathetic Voice: rejoice in your beloveds'
pleasure. Choose actions that recognize, accept, coordinate and
synthesize the needs of your Jealous, Empathetic, Child and other
(Practical, Spiritual, Sexual) voices.
Love and enjoy the people in your life. Spread love and community.
GUIDING PARTNERS. You're the facilitator, your partner's the
facilitatee. As facilitator, read the facilitatee the cues in quotes
(")aloud. Read anything enclosed in square brackets [like this]
silently. Give your partner a few breaths' time to respond aloud
where you see asterisks (***).
"Center yourself: imagine you sit between your Insecure and Confident
voices, your Inner Derider and your Inner Praiser, your Giver and
your Taker. You experience from your CENTER between any two voices
when you accept both.
"Tell me when you feel centered. Then tell me about your Jealous
Voice, the part of you that fears competition and loss. What's your
Jealous Voice like? ***
"What does it do for you ? ***
"Move to a new position, a position for your JEALOUS VOICE. Identify
with, become your Jealous Voice. Take its posture; become it
energetically. As the Jealous Voice, say what you do for
[facilitatee's name], how you contribute to her/his inner ecology. ***
"If you, Jealous Voice, ran [name]'s life, what would you have [name]
do? *** Why would you have [name] do that? ***
"When did you emerge as a voice in [name]'s life? *** What's your
history, times when you took center stage, as her/his [name]'s
Jealous Voice? ***
"How did and do you shield [name]'s vulnerable Inner Child from hurt
in the situation that evokes you, Jealous Voice? ***
"Tell me, Jealous Voice, how you protect [name] from feeling "less
than" people you compare to you. ***
"How can [name] improve the areas he feels inferior? ***
"What concerns you as far as possible loss of attention and care from
your love? ***
"How do you contribute to the reactions you fear? ***
"What do you contribute, as [name] 's Jealous Voice, to [name]?
"What do you want [name] to appreciate you for? ***
"Close your eyes, Jealous Voice. Imagine you go to ANOTHER LIFE**,
another body, one where you imprint a script that influences you in
your jealous reactions today.
"Let yourself feel--then look at the feet of a person in an earlier
life, a person whose story will help [name] understand what motivates
you, Jealous Voice, at a deep level. What, if anything, covers your
feet? Tell me about your feet. ***
"Imagine they're your feet. And notice the rest of your body. What's
your body like? Young or old? *** Weak or strong? Male or female? ***
"How're you dressed? ***
"Tell me where you are. Describe your surroundings. Who's there? Tell
me the situation. ***
"Say what's going on around you. ***
"What's about to happen? ***
"Experience the key scene that led to your jealous scripting.
Describe it in the present tense as it unfolds. ***
'What emotions and body sensations do you experience in this scene?
"Feel those feelings now. Sink into them more deeply. Now express
your emotions, move your body, tell the other people involved in the
scene how you feel. Tell them aloud. ***
"What do you decide as a result of this scene. ***
"Do you draw any negative conclusions from that experience? ***
"Do you still carry jealous, vengeful or angry attitudes from that
"Relate your death. Say when you're not in that body anymore. ***
"Go to a higher place. Meet and speak aloud to any souls you harmed
or who harmed you in the scene you imagined. Forgive yourself and
"If you could redo that life, Jealous Voice, what would you change?
"What did you need to experience and learn, that life? ***
"Anyone from that past life remind you of someone in this life? ***
"Compare the past life with this one. ***
"Thank you, Jealous Voice, I understand how you feel and how you make
sense. Would you let [name] return to your Center position? ***
[Wait till s/he moves.] "Hi, Center. Tell me about your EMPATHETIC
VOICE, the part of you that rejoices at the joy your lovers share
with others ***
"Move to a position for that self. [Wait till s/he moves.] Become
your Empathetic Voice. Say how you are, what you do and what you
would like to do for [name] . ***
"Tell me the main times she/he [choose one] experienced you, when you
came out in [name] 's life. ***
"Tell me how the times you came out helped [name] . ***
"Tell me what you'd like appreciation for. ***
"Tell me about the areas of [name]'s life nowadays where you'd like
her/him [choose one] to rejoice at the joy her/his [choose] love(s)
share(s) with others. ***
"Rate and describe, from your perspective as [name]'s Empathetic
Voice, [name] 's successes rejoicing at the love her/his [choose]
beloved(s) share(s) with others? ***
"Thank you, Empathetic Voice. Would you let [name] return to the
Center position. [Wait till s/he moves.] Feel and appreciate your
Jealous and Empathetic Voices at the same time. What've you've
learned so far. ****
"Move to another position and become your SEXUAL VOICE, the part of
you that feels sexual and sensual. [Wait till s/he moves.] As Sexual
Voice, what're your reactions to the situations that bring out
[name]'s Jealous and Empathetic Voices? *** What else would you like
[name] to know? ***
"Thank you, Sexual Voice. Would you let [name] return to Center.
[Wait till s/he moves.] Any comments you'd like to make on the Sexual
Voice, from your perspective as Center? ***
"Move to another position and become your SPIRITUAL VOICE, the part
of you that experiences the love, beauty, perfection and sacredness
in all situations. [Wait till s/he moves.] As Spiritual Voice,
what're your reactions to the situations that bring out [name]'s
Jealous and Empathetic Voices? ***
"What else would you like [name] to know? ***
"Thank you, Spiritual Voice. Let [name] return to Center. [Wait till
s/he moves.] Any comments you'd like to make on the Spiritual Voice,
from your perspective as Center? ****
"Move to another position for any other voice--perhaps your
PRACTICAL, CRITICAL, ARTISTIC or CHILD Voice--that wants to express
itself (about managing your Jealous Voice). Say what voice you're
enacting and say what, from your unique view, you'd like [name] to
hear . ***
"Thank you, I liked talking with you. Let [name] return to Center.
[Wait till s/he moves.]
"Move again. This time, become the facilitative part of yourself; be
your INNER FACILITATOR. Summarize the session. Review the selves
[name] voiced and what she/he learned from each."
"Now focus on yourself, Inner Therapist, as one of [name] 's voices.
Say your qualities? What would you like [name] to hear?"
"Go back to the Center seat. Discuss the session. ***