They Spew. Therefore, they are.
"Cogito Ergo Sum (I think, therefore, I am.)
- Rene Descartes, 1637
* * * *
They regurgitate and have diarrhea. Therefore, they are.
Therefore, they ate a virulent mold in Chobani yogurt
and the company assured consumers that could do no harm.
Ten months ago, in September of 2013, hundreds of Chobani
Greek yogurt eaters became sick to their stomachs after
eating a fungus in their yogurt called Mucor circinelloides.
In July, 2014, the journal mBIO published their findings
regarding the etiology (eat-eee-ology) of mass heavings
subsequent to the largest Greek yogurt recall in history.
Soo Chan Lee of Duke University did not trust Chobani's
vomit investigation, or the shoddy investigation conducted
by America's Food and Drug Administration (FDA). Dr. Lee
was motivated to issue a press release, in which he wrote:
"When we heard about the Chobani recall after reports
of people becoming sick from yogurt contaminated with
Mucor circinelloides, we thought the M. circinelloides
strain could cause more serious problems than one might
So what happened to the unfortunate Chobani eaters?
Got puking, nausea, and diarrhea for two days?
FDA initially concluded that the M. circinelloides mold
had little or no effect on humans.
In a July 8, 2014 story, Food Safety News explained
Chobani's reaction to the consumer vomiting by writing:
"The company cited a statement by Randy Worobo, a professor
of Food Science in Cornell University's College of Agriculture
and Life Sciences, that stated: 'Mucor circinelloides is a
species of mold commonly associated with fruits, vegetables
and dairy that has been reported to cause spoilage like
swelling and bloating in yogurt. It is not considered a
disease-causing foodborne microorganism.'"
* * * *
"I love cake. I love pie. I love potato chips. I love salt.
I do not want yogurt, plain yogurt. It's healthy. 'Why don't
you like it?' Because it tastes like bad breath."
- Bill Cosby
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