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Groundhog Day 2009

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  • cohensmilk1
    Groundhog Day 2009 My list of favorite movies includes Groundhog Day. If you have not seen it, take my advice and do so. I ll readily admit to having seen the
    Message 1 of 1 , Feb 2, 2009
      Groundhog Day 2009

      My list of favorite movies includes Groundhog Day.
      If you have not seen it, take my advice and do so.
      I'll readily admit to having seen the film at least
      20 times, and will view it again this year if it's
      on TV.

      At approximately 7:25 AM, a groundhog will trek to
      Gobbler's Notch to make the official prediction that
      six more weeks of winter remain in 2009. Today's
      celebration will mark the 123rd consecutive year that
      Groundhog Day has been celebrated in Punxsutawney,

      Come sunshine, rain, or snow, the groundhog's keeper
      has assured us that their little rodent will see some
      sort of shadow due to his enormously fattened bulk,
      even though it's cloudy and snowing lightly in
      Punxsutawney as this message is being posted at
      4:45 AM.

      The fix is in. They've been feeding him ice cream
      during the "off season.

      This past year, American consumers have been presented
      with the dairy industry argument that consuming dairy
      products helps people to lose weight, which makes
      absolutely no sense, but makes for great press by
      those whose job it is to deceive America into
      consuming milk.

      On average, groundhogs weigh a little over five pounds
      when they emerge from hibernation in the spring. After
      a summer of eating, September weights can soar to ten
      pounds. The largest wild (free and uncaged) groundhog
      weighed in at fourteen pounds!

      The bigger news has nothing to do with the eather. It's
      why Punxsutawney Phil has become the Holstein cow of
      groundhogs. He's the pig of litte furry hibernators. What
      has Phil been munching on all winter while observing his
      dairy-based weight loss program? Ice cream! The root of
      our groundhog's obesity ain't roots. It's dairy!

      Bill Deeley, the local funeral home director who emcees
      Punxsutawney's much-publicized Groundhog Day Festival and
      sees to Phil's needs 365 days out of the year, had this to
      say about Phil's diet:

      "He's naturally a vegetarian. But he loves ice cream and
      strawberry sundaes."

      Phil, the groundcow, weighs in at 15 pounds and measures
      22 inches in length.

      Could an overweight Phil be due to the powerful growth factors
      in milk and dairy products? Groundhogs should not be eating a
      diet of bovine growth hormones and high calorie-containing
      saturated animal fat. Neither should humans, for that matter.

      So...eyewitnesses will see Phil spring from his burrow and
      report that he saw his own shadow. Winter continues for
      everybody. Easy on the ice cream, or you and Phil might
      look lousy in bathing suits next summer.

      Robert Cohen
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