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191881Re: [nde] Joel

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  • Michelle Stright
    Aug 6, 2014
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      Hi Noni,

      I meant to add my prayers for your friend Noni. Didn't mean to leave you out. I hope everything works out for her in the way she wants it to be. My friend who is also dying of cancer, is doing so at her own home, surrounded by family. Some are lucky enough to to have things their way as everyone should. But these days, doing things our way isn't always an option. Tough times indeed.

      Best,
      Michelle






      Difficult.. My friend has one sister who is a teacher and is already behind her work in getting ready for her class to begin. Her sister lives over 100 miles away. There is a challenge in finding a place for Susan to stay.  She may need a ride to get her added Chemo treatments. Her 90 year old mother is being taken care of by her 80+ year old sister right now. Her mother doesn't know her daughter has stage 4 cancer. Losing a child-no matter how old (or young) the mother and daughter are- is painful. 
      Susan has no spouse or children. The last time Susan had cancer, she stayed at a house of a fellow church member. That church friend -later found out she also had cancer and died a few years ago. 
      Her sister is trying to get her in a rehab or nursing home on the same side of town as her church so she will have visitors. Some nursing homes smell awful and the staff are dealing with too many patients. 
      I will try to visit her as much as I can and support her in any way I can. I also hope she finds a good place to stay that is not too far. 
      Death is easy.. The dying process -even for family and friends- is never easy. Years ago, the medical field would help the patient survive no matter what. These days they tell the patients what they feel their chances are to survive, tell them what treatments are available, and let them and family find the best resources for care during the dying process. 
      The medically uninsured don't get the treatment offers. 
      In my mind, it's about trying to make it as painless as possible. But I knew one person who refused the pain medications because she wanted to be 'present' with her family as much as possible during her final stages of cancer. 
      Not knowing what is best.. Also makes it difficult. 
      Noni




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