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Grandiosity, Fantasies, and Narcissism

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  • Sam Vaknin author of "Malignant Self Lov
    As one Source of Narcissistic Supply dwindles, the narcissist finds himself trapped in a frantic (though, at times, unconscious) effort to secure alternatives.
    Message 1 of 1 , Mar 20, 2007
      As one Source of Narcissistic Supply dwindles, the narcissist finds himself
      trapped in a frantic (though, at times, unconscious) effort to secure
      alternatives. As one Pathological Narcissistic Space (the narcissist's
      stomping grounds) is rendered "uninhabitable" (too many people "see through"
      the narcissist's manipulation and machinations) – the narcissist wanders off
      to find another.

      These hysterical endeavours sometimes lead to boom-bust cycles which
      involve, in the first stage, the formation of a Grandiosity Bubble.

      Continue to read this article here (click on this link):

      http://samvak.tripod.com/grandiositybubbles.html

      The grandiose fantasies of the narcissist inevitably and invariably clash
      with his drab, routine, and mundane reality. We call this constant
      dissonance the Grandiosity Gap. Sometimes the gap is so yawning that even
      the narcissist - however dimly - recognizes its existence. Still, this
      insight into his real situation fails to alter his behaviour. The narcissist
      knows that his grandiose fantasies are incommensurate with his
      accomplishments, knowledge, status, actual wealth (or lack thereof),
      physical constitution, or sex appeal - yet, he keeps behaving as though this
      were untrue.

      Continue to read this article here (click on this link):

      http://www.narcissistic-abuse.com/journal56.html

      The narcissist cathexes (emotionally invests) with grandiosity everything he
      owns or does: his nearest and dearest, his work, his environment. But, as
      time passes, this pathologically intense aura fades. The narcissist finds
      fault with things and people he had first thought impeccable. He
      energetically berates and denigrates that which he equally zealously exulted
      and praised only a short while before.

      Continue to read this article here (click on this link):

      http://samvak.tripod.com/devaluediscard.html

      Being the target of relentless, ubiquitous, and unjust persecution proves to
      the paranoid narcissist how important and feared he is. Being hounded by the
      mighty and the privileged validates his pivotal role in the scheme of
      things. Only vital, weighty, crucial, essential principals are thus bullied
      and intimidated, followed and harassed, stalked and intruded upon - goes his
      unconscious inner dialog. The narcissist consistently baits authority
      figures into punishing him and thus into upholding his delusional self-image
      as worthy of their attention. This provocative behaviour is called
      Projective Identification.

      Continue to read this article here (click on this link):

      http://www.narcissistic-abuse.com/journal60.html

      It is healthy to daydream and fantasize. It is the antechamber of life and
      its circumstances. It is a process of preparing for eventualities,
      embellished and decorated. No, I am talking about feeling grandiose.

      This feeling has four components.

      Continue to read this article here (click on this link):

      http://www.narcissistic-abuse.com/journal9.html

      Question:

      What happens to a narcissist who lacks even the basic potential and skills
      to realise some of his grandiose fantasies?

      Answer:

      Continue to read this article here (click on this link):

      http://www.narcissistic-abuse.com/faq3.html

      Question:

      Is the narcissist confined in his grandiose fantasies to one subject?

      Answer:

      This apparently simple question is more complex than it sounds. The
      narcissist is bound to make use of his more pronounced traits and qualities
      in both the design of his False Self and the extraction of Narcissistic
      Supply from others. Thus, a cerebral narcissist is likely to emphasise his
      intellect, his brainpower, his analytical skills and his rich and varied
      fund of knowledge. A somatic narcissist accentuates his body, his physical
      strength, his appearance, his sex appeal and so on. But this is only one
      facet of the answer. It seems that narcissists engage in what could best be
      described as Narcissistic Hedges.

      Continue to read this article here (click on this link):

      http://www.narcissistic-abuse.com/faq35.html

      The disparity between the accomplishments of the narcissist and his
      grandiose fantasies and inflated self-image - the Grandiosity Gap - is
      staggering and, in the long run, insupportable. It imposes onerous
      exigencies on the narcissist's grasp of reality and social skills. It pushes
      him either to seclusion or to a frenzy of "acquisitions" - cars, women,
      wealth, power.

      Continue to read this article here (click on this link):

      http://samvak.tripod.com/grandiositygap.html

      cannot confront my life - that dreary, aimless, unpromising stream of days
      and nights and days. I am past my prime - a pitiable figure, a has been who
      never was, a loser and a failure (and not only by my inflated standards).
      These facts are hard enough to face when one is not burdened with a
      grandiose False Self and a sadistic inner voice (Superego). I have both.

      Continue to read this article here (click on this link):

      http://samvak.tripod.com/narcissistreal.html

      I feel entitled to more. I feel it is my right - due to my intellectual
      superiority - to lead a thrilling, rewarding, kaleidoscopic life. I feel
      entitled to force life itself, or, at least, people around me - to yield to
      my wishes and needs, supreme among them the need for stimulating variety.

      Continue to read this article here (click on this link):

      http://samvak.tripod.com/entitlement.html

      Question:

      I met many narcissists who are modest – even self-effacing. This seems to
      conflict with your observations. How do you reconcile the two?

      Answer:

      Continue to read this article here (click on this link):

      http://www.narcissistic-abuse.com/faq36.html

      To avoid the agonizing realization of his failed, defeat-strewn, biography,
      the narcissist resorts to reality-substitutes. The dynamics are simple: as
      the narcissist grows older, his Sources of Supply become scarcer, and his
      Grandiosity Gap yawns wider. Mortified by the prospect of facing his
      actuality, the narcissist withdraws ever deeper into a dreamland of
      concocted accomplishments, feigned omnipotence and omniscience, and brattish
      entitlement.

      Continue to read this article here (click on this link):

      http://www.narcissistic-abuse.com/journal74.html

      The manic phase of Bipolar I Disorder is often misdiagnosed as Narcissistic
      Personality Disorder (NPD).

      Bipolar patients in the manic phase exhibit many of the signs and symptoms
      of pathological narcissism - hyperactivity, self-centeredness, lack of
      empathy, and control freakery. During this recurring chapter of the disease,
      the patient is euphoric, has grandiose fantasies, spins unrealistic schemes,
      and has frequent rage attacks (is irritable) if her or his wishes and plans
      are (inevitably) frustrated.

      Continue to read this article here (click on this link):

      http://www.narcissistic-abuse.com/journal71.html

      The narcissist's very self is a piece of fiction concocted to fend off hurt
      and to nurture the narcissist's grandiosity. He fails in his "reality
      test" - the ability to distinguish the actual from the imagined. The
      narcissist fervently believes in his own infallibility, brilliance,
      omnipotence, heroism, and perfection. He doesn't dare confront the truth and
      admit it even to himself.

      Continue to read this article here (click on this link):

      http://www.narcissistic-abuse.com/journal75.html

      The irony is that narcissists, who consider themselves worldly, discerning,
      knowledgeable, shrewd, erudite, and astute - are actually more gullible than
      the average person. This is because they are fake. Their self is false,
      their life a confabulation, their reality test gone. They live in a fantasy
      land all their own in which they are the center of the universe, admired,
      feared, held in awe, and respected for their omnipotence and omniscience.

      Continue to read this article here (click on this link):

      http://samvak.tripod.com/narcissistgullible.html
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