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40914Fwd: Holy Humor

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  • JSFrog65@...
    Jul 29, 2014
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      -----Original Message-----
      From: K Shultz <k_dshultz@...>
      Sent: Tue, Jul 29, 2014 8:33 pm
      Subject: FW: Holy Humor

      During these serious and troubled times, people of all
      faiths should remember these four great religious

      1. Muslims do not recognize Jews as God's
      Chosen People.

      2. Jews do not recognize Jesus as the

      3. Protestants do not recognize the Pope
      as the leader of the Christian world.

      4. Baptists do not recognize each other at the liquor


      A Sunday school teacher was telling her class the
      story of the Good Samaritan.

      She asked the class, "If you saw a person lying on the
      roadside, all wounded and

      bleeding, what would you do?"

      A thoughtful little girl broke the hushed silence, "I
      think I'd throw up."


      A Sunday school teacher asked, "Johnny, do you think
      Noah did a lot of fishing when he was on the
      Ark ?"

      "No," replied Johnny. "How could he, with just two


      A Sunday School teacher decided to have her young
      class memorize one of the most quoted passages in the Bible - Psalm 23. She
      gave the youngsters a month to learn the chapter. Little Rick was excited
      about the task - but he just couldn't remember the Psalm. After much practice,
      he could barely get past the first line.

      On the day that the kids were scheduled to recite
      Psalm 23 in front of the congregation, Ricky was so nervous. When it was his
      turn, he stepped up to the microphone and said proudly, "The Lord is my
      Shepherd, and that's all I need to know.


      The preacher's 5 year-old daughter noticed that her
      father always paused and bowed his head for a moment before starting his
      sermon. One day, she asked him why.

      "Well, Honey," he began, proud that his daughter was
      so observant of his messages. "I'm asking the Lord to help me preach a good

      "How come He doesn't answer it?" she


      A Rabbi said to a precocious six-year-old boy, "So
      your mother says your prayers for you each night? That's very commendable.
      What does she say?"

      The little boy replied, "Thank God he's in

      ALL MEN / ALL

      When my daughter, Kelli, said her bedtime
      prayers, she would bless every family member, every friend, and every animal
      (current and past). For several weeks, after we had finished the nightly
      prayer, Kelli would say, "And all girls."

      This soon became part of her nightly routine, to
      include this closing. My curiosity got the best of me and I asked her, "Kelli,
      why do you always add the part about all girls?"

      Her response, "Because everybody always finish their
      prayers by saying 'All Men'!


      Little Johnny and his family were having Sunday dinner
      at his Grandmother's house. Everyone was seated around the table as the food
      was being served. When Little Johnny received his plate, he started eating
      right away.

      "Johnny! Please wait until we say our
      prayer." said his mother.

      "I don't need to," the boy

      "Of course, you do "his mother insisted.
      "We always say a prayer before eating at our house."

      "That's at our house." Johnny explained. "But this is
      Grandma's house and she knows how to cook.


      Did you know that... When you carry the Bible, Satan
      has a headache. When you open it, he collapses. When he sees you reading it,
      he faints. Let's read the Bible every day so he keeps on fainting. Maybe one
      day he'll have a stroke and never wake up. And did you also know that when you
      are about to forward this email to others the devil will discourage you but
      forward it anyway