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Re: [Meditation Society of America] Jim Dreaver

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  • Melody
    Hi Jason, Thanks for forwarding this..... [] ... I appreciate that definition very much. This speaks to the question I posed last night as to what some may see
    Message 1 of 34 , Feb 23, 2003
      Hi Jason,

      Thanks for forwarding this.....


      > Enlightenment, or awakening, simply means the end of
      > suffering. That is, no more
      > personal angst, worry, conflict, or inner struggle.

      I appreciate that definition very much.

      This speaks to the question I posed last night
      as to what some may see as the correlation between enlightenment and
      the kundalini process.

      In my self, I've come to see the parallels between
      kundalini 'symptoms' (and certain energetic
      experiences from within the body)

      and that of transformation in consciousness.

      In other words, the 'symptoms' seem to mirror
      what is happening (or about to happen) in

      And part of what I observe in this transformation
      of consciousness is just what is described above.

      Such a melting away of the inner struggle, the
      personal angst and worry that 'drove' my life
      for almost a half century. And although
      that 'melting' process has not yet completed,
      the difference in life experience day to day
      is remarkable (to me).....especially when I
      look back on all those years of inner torment....

      and what I call 'divided mind' fighting one part
      against another.'

      I say that the process isn't complete because
      there are still some moments, such as this very
      moment, when there is the experience of
      "divided mind".....when natural, unencumbered
      action is halted by a 'nah saying' voice.

      (As convoluted as this may seem, this
      'nah saying' voice....voice of 'judgment'....
      is what I would characterize as an 'affliction'...
      something that is an obstruction to natural,
      spontaneous movement.....and that which
      creates 'suffering'.)

      > That's how the Buddha
      > defined it, that is how Jean Klein, my teacher defined
      > it.

      I never knew that.

      > He also made it clear
      > that once the suffering goes, clarity reigns supreme,
      > and you always feel deeply
      > at peace within, regardless of what is going on around
      > you. I can testify to
      > that.
      > How, then, do we awaken? By seeing that the 'person'
      > we have taken ourselves to
      > be isn't real. In the seeing--and enlightenment is
      > above all a shift in
      > perception--the attachment to, or identification with,
      > thoughts centered around
      > 'I,' 'me,' and 'mine' falls away, Our head clears, our
      > body relaxes, our heart
      > opens. Thinking then becomes available as the
      > extraordinary creative tool that
      > it is.

      Yes. That's one way....the way commonly
      spoken of on these lists. As if one moment
      there was confusion, and then 'bam!' the
      light goes on, and suffering is no more.....ever.

      Life seems to have other 'designs' for melody.

      And today, after having had the strangest dream...
      and having even more 'symptoms' appearing,

      I don't mind saying that I kind of wish I had
      someone to talk to about all this. Not so much
      for guidance, or for answers. Just to be able
      to speak of this aloud.

      So even though you have said that you don't
      know anything about this stuff, I've volunteered
      you as my 'sounding board'. :-)

      I'm observing 2 voices at play within me this
      morning. One saying "don't try to figure this
      stuff out", and another voice naturally inclined
      to write about it.....to really 'look' at it.

      So, rightly or wrongly <g>, I'm going to
      disregard the voice of caution and just
      talk about it.

      I said last night that I had tender bumps on
      my crown. Well, what I realized last evening
      after writing this stuff, is that I hadn't also
      written about the tender 'bumps' on my ass. :-))

      I kid you not.....all of a sudden I have some
      kind of blisters a couple of inches below my
      tail bone. And it didn't strike me, until I was
      in bed last night, that one set of 'symptoms'
      were at the crown (chakra), while the other
      were at the base (chakra). I saw that, thought
      'how wierd'..... went to sleep.

      This morning I awoke with a dream about
      having a love affair with Sandeep. (Wouldn't
      he get a kick out of that ! )

      And I can remember wondering in my dream
      where was all this romantic passion coming from....
      in that I have loved Sandeep so much for years,
      but never thought of him in 'romantic' terms.

      But, boy howdy, was I loving him in a new 'way'
      last night. No it wasn't about sex. It was about
      wanting to 'be' with him...touch him....lie next to
      him. And fortunately for me, in my dream,
      him wanting to do the same.

      But then, later this morning, remembering my
      earlier association of the 'bumps' being at first
      and seventh chakra locations, I did a quick
      search and found this:

      "The feminine force of Shakti is assigned to the base Chakra, and the
      male force of Shiva to the crown. When Kundalini rises fully, Shakti
      and Shiva are united and cosmic consciousness is born. When the two
      Chakras are not united, a state of duality exists."

      Well, you could have knocked me over with a feather.

      Having heard that, another element of my dream was
      recalled. That the only thing stopping him from totally
      being with *me* was his duty to, and concern about,
      his invalid wife. (Remember folks, this is just a dream.)

      I remember thinking that I understood....and I didn't
      want him to leave her. That I was completely willing
      to have whatever part of him (time wise) was available
      to me. And then, just before I woke up, I was with
      his wife....befriending her....caring for her, too. It
      had no longer become an 'either/or' situation.

      Having said this now, the question arises in me,

      Who is the ailing and invalid wife waiting to be
      befriended by me?

    • Melody
      ... away from you....It is your experience, your insight. Now I getcha. I just caught myself trying to justify my experience to Jason. I see how this
      Message 34 of 34 , Feb 28, 2003
        >Yes, I know what that's like......Now...don't let anyone attempt to take this
        away from you....It is your experience, your insight.

        Now I getcha.

        I just caught myself trying
        to 'justify' my experience to

        I see how this tendency is related
        to the other: an attempt to justify
        my experience.

        And in the end, it's an attempt
        to justify 'me'.

        Breathing in, breathing out.....


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