Oh, man. A hoot. You gotta
give Judi credit for a her
wonderful sense of humor.
SHE is a hoot. I think I've
written that before.
Reminds me of a tea story
of my own:
My wife, Susan, in the lock
down ward of the health nuts,
order some tea from the
Amazon, called Shipibo.
Not being a tea drinker,
I turned down her offer
to share a cup.
As she looked over the
literature that came with
the tea shipment, she noted
a suggestion that the tea
leaves left over after making
tea, could be integrated
into the soil of plants.
We have a lot of house
plants. One has particularly
heavy leaves that droop over
the side of the pot. Susan
picked this one for her
first experiment. I shrugged.
The next morning, the leaves
of that plant were standing
straight up firm and tall.
"I'll have some of that tea, now."
were my first words that morning.
--- In firstname.lastname@example.org
> Thanks to Judi Rhodes for sharing this jem....
> Well, here is a true life example from the Phoenix College.
> An English Professor assigned his students to a joint writing
> exercise that quickly degraded - check it out...
> "Today we will experiment with a new form called the tandem story.
> The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the person
> sitting to his or her immediate right."
> "As homework tonight, one of you will write the first paragraph of
> short story. You will e-mail your partner that paragraph and send
> another copy to me. The partner will read the first paragraph and
> add another paragraph to the story and send it back also sending
> another copy to me. The first person will then add a third
> and so on, back and forth."
> "Remember to re-read what has been written each time in order to
> keep the story coherent. There is to be absolutely NO talking
> of the e-mails and anything you wish to say must be written in the
> "The story is over when both agree a conclusion has been reached."
> The following was actually turned in by two of my English students:
> Rebecca (last name deleted), and Gary (last name deleted).
> THE STORY:
> (First paragraph by Rebecca)
> At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea she wanted.
> chamomile, which used to be her favorite for lazy evenings at
> home, now reminded her too much of Carl, who once said, in
> happier times, that he liked chamomile. But she felt she
> now, at all costs, keep her mind off Carl. His possessiveness
> suffocating, and if she thought about him too much her asthma
> acting up again. So chamomile was out of the question.
> (Second paragraph by Gary)
> Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of the attack
> squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4, had more important things
> think about than the neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo
> named Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night over a
> ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17", he said into his
> transgalactic communicator. "Polar orbit established. No sign of
> resistance so far...But before he could sign off, a bluish particle
> beam flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through his ship's
> cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent him flying out of his
> seat and across the cockpit.
> He bumped his head and died almost immediately, but not before he
> felt one last pang of regret for psychically brutalizing the one
> woman who had ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth
> stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peaceful farmers of
> Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law Permanently Abolishing War and
> Travel," Laurie read in her newspaper one morning. The news
> simultaneously excited her and bored her. She stared out the
> dreaming of her youth, when the days had passed unhurriedly and
> carefree, with no newspapers to read, no television to distract her
> from her sense of innocent wonder at all the beautiful things
> her. "Why must one lose one's innocence to become a woman?"
> she pondered wistfully.
> Little did she know, but she had less than 10 seconds to live.
> Thousands of miles above the city, the Anu'udrian mothership
> the first of its lithium fusion missiles. The dimwitted wimpy
> peaceniks that pushed the Unilateral Aerospace Disarmament Treaty
> through the congress had left Earth a defenseless target for the
> hostile alien empires who were determined to destroy the human
> Within two hours after the passage of the treaty the Anu'udrian
> ships were on course for Earth, carrying enough firepower to
> the entire planet. With no one to stop them, they swiftly
> their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile entered the
> atmosphere unimpeded. The President, in his top-secret mobile
> submarine headquarters on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam,
> the inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized poor, stupid,
> Laurie and 85 million other Americans. The President slammed his
> on the conference table. "We can't allow this! I'm going to veto
> treaty! Let's blow 'em out of the sky!"
> This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of literature.
> My writing partner is a violent, chauvinistic semiliterate
> Yeah? Well, you're a self-centered tedious neurotic whose attempts
> at writing are the literary equivalent of Valium. "Oh shall I have
> chamomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of F***ING TEA???
> Oh no, I'm such an air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle
> Steele novels."
> Get screwed.
> Eat sh**.
> SC*** YOU - YOU NEANDERTHAL!!!
> GO DRINK SOME TEA - B***h.
> A+ - I really liked this one. Only group to get an A.