- For some months now my mediation had stayed at a superficial level. I
noticed that I had more mind chatter, although it did not seem that much
more than normal. The result however, was that I seldom went deeper than the
first two levels. So today, I tried some subtle variations.
I started by appreciating that rather than having "one" mind I have
"several" minds working seamlessly to give the impression of one mind. The
dominate mind was the one producing the mind chatter. What was happening
recently was that it was maintaining a firmer grip over the other "minds".
By not releasing control, I was not able to access the "higher" minds as I
normally did during meditation.
The question now was how to get the mind chatter "mind" to release control.
Usually, simply reducing the physical sensations was sufficient to start the
process (reducing the stimuli from my five senses). The second step was to
listen for the most subtle inner sound. When I locked onto that sound, I
would normally go deeper into meditation as the subtle sound grew louder.
The insight I had today was that it was not so much the subtle sound that
was important but the attitude of listening. It is paying deep attention
anticipating something, without knowing what it would be. That "attitude"
took me deeper into my meditation instantly. It was independent of there
being a subtle inner sound.
As I went into the deeper stages, I noticed the usual physical symptoms with
their corresponding inner sounds. However the normal feelings of euphoria
were not as strong. When I came out of the mediation, the room seemed
brighter and sharper.
I had a few other insights. One was that at deeper levels of mediation, the
thought recording mechanism might have to be turned off - meaning that parts
of the mediation may not be remembered at the end of the session. The logic
of this was startling - imagine doing something and not remembering that you
did it (anyone see the film "Memento"?).
Look forward to your thoughts and comments.
- Thanks for a such a beautiful description..."No agenda mediation".
Letting go, to me, means more than simple surrender. We can think that
we have surrender and are ready for whatever comes in meditation,
however, when something truly unique and unusual comes along, our
instinctive fear of the unknown kicks in and we withdraw until we have
understood what is happening.
One experience comes to mind. I was practicing inner sounds mediation
when, out of nowhere I heard a continuous bell-like sound from within
grow louder. It started faintly but grew louder very quickly. My fear
was that it would grow louder until it (my mind) exploded. Since I had
no previous experience to guide me I startled myself out of the session.
Afterwards, I regretted doing that. My sense was that I had triggered
something and it needed to run its course. By stopping it before it had
completed its passage I had prevented myself from moving to a higher
plane. What is odd is that I have nothing to support this idea except
wishful thinking maybe.
The point though is that "acceptance" means accepting the unknown, no
matter how strange. Not simply saying I accept whatever comes - so long
as it is not unpleasant. My sense is that until we release that inner
defense mechanism, many paths of meditation will never open up.
Mediating with absolute acceptance will, I feel, give different results
to meditation with tacit acceptance.
Date: Sun, 13 Mar 2005 16:32:25 EST
Subject: Re: Mediation Insights
I believe this is what is meant by "surrender." And, yes, it is
our normal minds. But it is, I venture to say, much closer to truly
connected--to that which we can't name or coceptualize--or even know!
Are we really
ready and willing to do this? I wonder.
And I sure hope so.
Interesting. For those of us who say we want to be 'enlightened'--yet
want to remain in control, and to direct the higher energies we tap
Thanks for sharing your observations/insights.I have been experiencing
similar ones in my meditation. Today, as I efforted at going in deeper,
becoming enmeshed in my own thoughts, I found myself just letting go,
nothing, just allowing my thoughts to go, not looking for or expecting
I, too, found myself going deeper. But, as you said, I had to (also)
my right/desire to glean something from this. I had to just sit, not
not understanding, no agenda. And, upon coming out, I still had no
or insight. I do believe that, today, I was experiencing something
No agenda meditation--either going in, during, or coming out. Now, what
you make of that???
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