The power of the family
Here is an article I wrote about family. I just wanted to share it with you for
We can see the miracle of God's creation when we look to our family. They are a great gift and often a challenge. It is easy to understand us when we see ourselves through the different reflections of our families. Sometimes we love them and other times we may not speak to them for years but, in any case, they are here to show us who we are. The family can be seen as a microcosm of the whole world, in that every dynamic of personal interaction will come up within the family unit. The family reflects the different dramas that are played in the outer world. When we can see this as a blessing, we can better understand the world around us.
Have you noticed how certain family members are on the hot seat at different times in their lives? Each of our siblings and their children show us many insights about ourselves. If we can learn to watch the family as a movie, noticing who is on center stage at which point, we will understand the lesson we need as a family and individually. By noticing who is sitting in the hot seat and for what reason, we can understand the next step in our own evolution. Let us look to our family to resolve our inner conflicts.
We usually look to our parents when we want to figure out why we are the way we are. And yes, we are a reflection of our mother and father culminating with our own soul's journey. And until we love mom for who she is and dad for who he is, it will be difficult to love them, the world around us, and ourselves unconditionally. They are here to teach us through whatever habits, characteristics and lifestyle they may have. Many people have issues with their parents and would not want to believe this. This does not mean that we have to like the things that they do or agree with their lifestyle. But when we can accept them and know that they are doing the best they can in any moment, this is the healing.
Most of us who have been raised in the old patriarchal model understand this prime example of how the system does not work. The old model uses the concept of "divide and conquer" to instill fear, creating separation. As we move into the new paradigm of the nurturing feminine spirit, we must release the old system. Many of us are caught in between the two worlds at this time. If we stop playing the game, we have to separate out from the family members who still want to play it. It does not need to be indefinite, but long enough to have the space to find our own power and live as an example of the sacred feminine.
We can understand this feeling of being caught between two worlds most clearly through the family, seeing it as a reflection of the world. The old world game has been instilled in us for thousands of years through the church, state, and education systems. Bringing this model into the family unit has been the natural evolution of this paradigm. With fear as the basis for this system there is always a feeling of lack. Parents, children, and siblings play games with each other and off of one another to attain their own individual needs. Holding one's own agenda above all else, the system has to stay in conflict.
Another look at this system can be seen through the matriarch. She is the great nurturer in the family unit. She is the focal point that holds the family together. From giving birth, to feeding and nurturing the family, to listening and counseling as the family grows, makes her a pillar of strength. At all costs, we strive to protect the matriarch. It brings to the surface our deepest survival instincts when the matriarch is in disarray. The very nature of holding her up, or longing to protect her, keeps us trapped into the old system as we lock into a co-dependent relationship.
The patriarch is just as important to understand and embrace as we make this shift in consciousness to bring in the sacred feminine. He is the provider, the hunter and gatherer, who bring home the food. His place in the family system is strong and needs to be seen, not more important or better than the matriarch, but as an equal contribution to the family unit.
When we see our mother and father as equal to each other and equal to us, we can no longer give our power away to them, and must claim it for ourselves. The nature of our shift in this perception of the family will allow us to free ourselves, discovering our own individual gift that we bring into the world; our soul's purpose.
What if we shifted our focus away from our individual needs, to understanding the greater picture of enhancing the whole family? In this place, we can easily see the repercussions of our thoughts, feelings, and actions. We understand that any negative action or lack of action will spiral out to the entire group, thus creating a contraction of energy and keeping the family system in need of each other; thus keeping the old paradigm alive. On the other hand, if a family member does something positive for the group, the whole family is enhanced by this action. The more we are able to live in this expanded awareness, the easier it will be for all of us to make the new paradigm shift.
Let us take the time to understand our family patterns to help bridge this new world. Each family has its own agenda or contracts that they enter into this lifetime to fulfill. How they are played out is the framework from which we chose to learn our life lessons. If we want the freedom to live our soul's purpose we need to understand the contracts we made before coming into this life. By realizing the nature of our relationships to our parents and siblings, we can unlock the key to our happiness.