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14171Re: The Writing Assignment

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  • Jeff Belyea
    Jul 2, 2005
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      Oh, man. A hoot. You gotta
      give Judi credit for a her
      wonderful sense of humor.
      SHE is a hoot. I think I've
      written that before.

      Reminds me of a tea story
      of my own:

      My wife, Susan, in the lock
      down ward of the health nuts,
      order some tea from the
      Amazon, called Shipibo.
      Not being a tea drinker,
      I turned down her offer
      to share a cup.

      As she looked over the
      literature that came with
      the tea shipment, she noted
      a suggestion that the tea
      leaves left over after making
      tea, could be integrated
      into the soil of plants.

      We have a lot of house
      plants. One has particularly
      heavy leaves that droop over
      the side of the pot. Susan
      picked this one for her
      first experiment. I shrugged.

      The next morning, the leaves
      of that plant were standing
      straight up firm and tall.

      "I'll have some of that tea, now."
      were my first words that morning.


      --- In meditationsocietyofamerica@yahoogroups.com, medit8ionsociety
      <no_reply@y...> wrote:
      > Thanks to Judi Rhodes for sharing this jem....
      > -------------------------------------------------------------------
      > Well, here is a true life example from the Phoenix College.
      > An English Professor assigned his students to a joint writing
      > exercise that quickly degraded - check it out...
      > "Today we will experiment with a new form called the tandem story.
      > The process is simple. Each person will pair off with the person
      > sitting to his or her immediate right."
      > "As homework tonight, one of you will write the first paragraph of
      > short story. You will e-mail your partner that paragraph and send
      > another copy to me. The partner will read the first paragraph and
      > add another paragraph to the story and send it back also sending
      > another copy to me. The first person will then add a third
      > and so on, back and forth."
      > "Remember to re-read what has been written each time in order to
      > keep the story coherent. There is to be absolutely NO talking
      > of the e-mails and anything you wish to say must be written in the
      > e-mail."
      > "The story is over when both agree a conclusion has been reached."
      > The following was actually turned in by two of my English students:
      > Rebecca (last name deleted), and Gary (last name deleted).
      > ----------------------------------------------------------------
      > THE STORY:
      > (First paragraph by Rebecca)
      > At first, Laurie couldn't decide which kind of tea she wanted.
      > chamomile, which used to be her favorite for lazy evenings at
      > home, now reminded her too much of Carl, who once said, in
      > happier times, that he liked chamomile. But she felt she
      > now, at all costs, keep her mind off Carl. His possessiveness
      > suffocating, and if she thought about him too much her asthma
      > acting up again. So chamomile was out of the question.
      > (Second paragraph by Gary)
      > Meanwhile, Advance Sergeant Carl Harris, leader of the attack
      > squadron now in orbit over Skylon 4, had more important things
      > think about than the neuroses of an air-headed asthmatic bimbo
      > named Laurie with whom he had spent one sweaty night over a
      > ago. "A.S. Harris to Geostation 17", he said into his
      > transgalactic communicator. "Polar orbit established. No sign of
      > resistance so far...But before he could sign off, a bluish particle
      > beam flashed out of nowhere and blasted a hole through his ship's
      > cargo bay. The jolt from the direct hit sent him flying out of his
      > seat and across the cockpit.
      > (Rebecca)
      > He bumped his head and died almost immediately, but not before he
      > felt one last pang of regret for psychically brutalizing the one
      > woman who had ever had feelings for him. Soon afterwards, Earth
      > stopped its pointless hostilities towards the peaceful farmers of
      > Skylon 4. "Congress Passes Law Permanently Abolishing War and
      > Travel," Laurie read in her newspaper one morning. The news
      > simultaneously excited her and bored her. She stared out the
      > dreaming of her youth, when the days had passed unhurriedly and
      > carefree, with no newspapers to read, no television to distract her
      > from her sense of innocent wonder at all the beautiful things
      > her. "Why must one lose one's innocence to become a woman?"
      > she pondered wistfully.
      > (Gary)
      > Little did she know, but she had less than 10 seconds to live.
      > Thousands of miles above the city, the Anu'udrian mothership
      > the first of its lithium fusion missiles. The dimwitted wimpy
      > peaceniks that pushed the Unilateral Aerospace Disarmament Treaty
      > through the congress had left Earth a defenseless target for the
      > hostile alien empires who were determined to destroy the human
      > Within two hours after the passage of the treaty the Anu'udrian
      > ships were on course for Earth, carrying enough firepower to
      > the entire planet. With no one to stop them, they swiftly
      > their diabolical plan. The lithium fusion missile entered the
      > atmosphere unimpeded. The President, in his top-secret mobile
      > submarine headquarters on the ocean floor off the coast of Guam,
      > the inconceivably massive explosion, which vaporized poor, stupid,
      > Laurie and 85 million other Americans. The President slammed his
      > on the conference table. "We can't allow this! I'm going to veto
      > treaty! Let's blow 'em out of the sky!"
      > (Rebecca)
      > This is absurd. I refuse to continue this mockery of literature.
      > My writing partner is a violent, chauvinistic semiliterate
      > (Gary)
      > Yeah? Well, you're a self-centered tedious neurotic whose attempts
      > at writing are the literary equivalent of Valium. "Oh shall I have
      > chamomile tea? Or shall I have some other sort of F***ING TEA???
      > Oh no, I'm such an air headed bimbo who reads too many Danielle
      > Steele novels."
      > (Rebecca)
      > A**hole.
      > (Gary)
      > B****.
      > (Rebecca)
      > Get screwed.
      > (Gary)
      > Eat sh**.
      > (Rebecca)
      > SC*** YOU - YOU NEANDERTHAL!!!
      > (Gary)
      > GO DRINK SOME TEA - B***h.
      > **********************************************
      > (TEACHER)
      > A+ - I really liked this one. Only group to get an A.
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